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Author Topic: The Guitar Topic  (Read 1492416 times)

doombilly

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1550 on: 09 Mar 2008, 11:04 »

Bonus points if you play misirlou when you do it.

I tried that once, I swear it is easier to do it Dick Dale stop with your hand over the top (er um bottom?  the side of the neck with the high E).

And on a completely random note, why are there so many female bass players?  I have gigantic monkey hands and I pick up a bass and some of the stretches still seem huge.

Four fingers for three frets when you're near the nut.
Wrong. More like your monkey hands can't make the stretch. Limber up. Ican't do it that well. That's why Ihave a girl play the bass.  :P
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1551 on: 09 Mar 2008, 11:22 »

Shane, if you want a non-existant guitar, I'll be happy to convert all of your instruments.

I THINK NOT.
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Patrick

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1552 on: 09 Mar 2008, 11:27 »

That's why Ihave a girl play the bass.  :P

Female bass players are the sexiest thing known to man. Second in the running is boyshorts and a close third is girl-ninjas.

Also Shane don't be a pussy I promise I won't damage anything. Just steal it. COME ON BUDDY
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valley_parade

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1553 on: 09 Mar 2008, 11:33 »

My guitars.

YOU DON'T TOUCHING THEM.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1554 on: 09 Mar 2008, 11:42 »

I'll use a robotic arm if I have to.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1555 on: 09 Mar 2008, 12:01 »

No, seriously. I've only let one person ever play one of my guitars. And the only reason was that I was really into her.

I hate to break it to you, Patrick, but I don't love you in that way.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1556 on: 09 Mar 2008, 12:09 »

Oooh, new LTD Eclipses. Distressed, at that!

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1557 on: 09 Mar 2008, 14:29 »

@Jeph: With all due respect, Fuck You!

@Pat: I think that I have to replace girl ninjas with girls in combat boots, sorry. For the good of humanity and whatnot.

What the hell is the idea behind distressed guitars? Same with distressed jeans, or distressed anything. So I could buy something, have it for a couple years, and then sell it as "distressed" for no loss?
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Beastmouth

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1558 on: 09 Mar 2008, 15:56 »

@Jeph: With all due respect, Fuck You!

@Pat: I think that I have to replace girl ninjas with girls in combat boots, sorry. For the good of humanity and whatnot.

What the hell is the idea behind distressed guitars? Same with distressed jeans, or distressed anything. So I could buy something, have it for a couple years, and then sell it as "distressed" for no loss?
The way I understand it, it's for people who'd rather try to look cool and not worry about breaking anything than actually, you know, take any risks.
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greenMonkey

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1559 on: 09 Mar 2008, 15:57 »

I don't understand the ideas behind 'relic'-ing guitars.  I would rather rock out hard enough that my guitar got beat up than beat my guitar up and pretend its vintage.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1560 on: 09 Mar 2008, 16:00 »

Are the distressed ones more durable? Otherwise you are still going to get it beaten up eventually, getting stuff with fake damage just seems stupid.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1561 on: 09 Mar 2008, 16:45 »

What the hell is the idea behind distressed guitars? Same with distressed jeans, or distressed anything. So I could buy something, have it for a couple years, and then sell it as "distressed" for no loss?

I prefer to distress my own jeans, it's so much more authentic when it's your own natural wear patterns. Guitars are no different. It's far superior to have your own actual finger-grime on the fretboard than to have finger-grime simulator.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1562 on: 09 Mar 2008, 16:47 »

Yeah, I agree. Though I only have finger-grime on the fingerboard because I always forget to clean it off while I change strings, because I am usually in a hurry to get back to playing.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1563 on: 09 Mar 2008, 17:01 »

in b4 Blackie
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MadassAlex

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1564 on: 09 Mar 2008, 17:07 »

Is it okay to use saliva to clean fretboard grime?
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1565 on: 09 Mar 2008, 17:10 »

Sure, why not.

Blackie? What is that? Is it worse than Mike Campbell's Broadcaster?
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1566 on: 09 Mar 2008, 17:18 »

You know that black Stratocaster with the maple fretboard that Clapton used a lot? The really old, really pretty one? The one that was made with parts from three different Strats?

Yeah that one.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1567 on: 09 Mar 2008, 17:27 »

No, actually, I don't. Sorry.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1568 on: 09 Mar 2008, 19:46 »

Blackie isn't really that beat up, just a lot of fretboard wear and some hellacious buckle burn. 

I dislike relics, and I don't really like signatures either (some are ok...).  this one just pisses me off though.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1569 on: 09 Mar 2008, 22:24 »

You know that black Stratocaster with the maple fretboard that Clapton used a lot? The really old, really pretty one? The one that was made with parts from three different Strats?

Yeah that one.
As a matter of fact, that quickly-visible wear is supposedly why Clapton prefers maple fretboards. 

About as good a reason as Les Paul saying ebony makes yr fingers 'look fast', I guess.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1570 on: 10 Mar 2008, 03:32 »

Wasn't aware of that, but that's exactly why I want an Olympic white Strat with a maple fretboard. The nitrocellulose finish will yellow with age, that maple will show your fretboard wear beautifully, and it's just a damn classy combination of colors and looks good with just about anything.
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Lummer

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1571 on: 10 Mar 2008, 04:24 »

Wasn't aware of that, but that's exactly why I want an Olympic white Strat with a maple fretboard. The nitrocellulose finish will yellow with age, that maple will show your fretboard wear beautifully, and it's just a damn classy combination of colors and looks good with just about anything.

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1572 on: 10 Mar 2008, 04:45 »

On one hand, he probably doesn't touch the fretboard much due to the scallops, but he probably drips enough grease and sweat onto it to age it faster than anyone.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1573 on: 10 Mar 2008, 05:00 »

Clapton's black Strat.
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Patrick

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1574 on: 10 Mar 2008, 05:00 »

Lummer I hate you. There is nobody on this earth I would be happier to see get punched in the face than Yngwie Fucking Malmsteen.
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doombilly

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1575 on: 10 Mar 2008, 06:52 »

I don't understand the ideas behind 'relic'-ing guitars.  I would rather rock out hard enough that my guitar got beat up than beat my guitar up and pretend its vintage.
Agreed. Totally retarded concept. When I see some kid with one of those, I want to distress them with my Dr Martens.

And:

[img width= height=]http://lh5.google.com/illicitizen/R9SIXnrWr-I/AAAAAAAAA5w/q1dypBLZELY/s400/IMG_0246.JPG[/img]
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1576 on: 10 Mar 2008, 10:56 »

I don't understand the ideas behind 'relic'-ing guitars.  I would rather rock out hard enough that my guitar got beat up than beat my guitar up and pretend its vintage.
Agreed. Totally retarded concept.

YES! THANKYOU!

I entirely agree. 'Antiquing' is such a bullshit concept. 'Let's make this guitar look older than it is and pretend that it means something to me.'

My '72 Custom is pristine, and I like that it is.

My Encore has bashes all over it, but I know that they all were, and they are my bashes, they're real.
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Nodaisho

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1577 on: 10 Mar 2008, 13:58 »

Lummer I hate you. There is nobody on this earth I would be happier to see get punched in the face than Yngwie Fucking Malmsteen.
Nobody? You sure about that? I am sure there has to be someone.

I honestly don't like the light-colored guitars, not even the white with gold furniture, which looks good, but not when someone is actually using it. Maybe it just has to be certain clothing that goes good with it.
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Patrick

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1578 on: 10 Mar 2008, 16:06 »

Maybe Putin and/or Hillary, but my distaste for them is way more fleeting than my hatred of Yngwie Fucking Malmsteen.

White + gold just looks bad altogether, if you ask me. Especially if the white has yellowed like it always will on a nitrocellulose-finish guitar.
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Beastmouth

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1579 on: 10 Mar 2008, 16:20 »

Gold hardware is easily the tackiest thing imaginable this side of a drunken Ibanez/BC Rich hookup
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1580 on: 10 Mar 2008, 16:23 »

I never wanted to picture that.

The imaginary pointyness of that guitar just cut my legs off.
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Ballard

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1581 on: 10 Mar 2008, 16:27 »

Gold hardware is easily the tackiest thing imaginable this side of a drunken Ibanez/BC Rich hookup



The only Strat I have ever found appealing (with a small number of exceptions).
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1582 on: 10 Mar 2008, 16:28 »

I never wanted to picture that.

The imaginary pointyness of that guitar just cut my legs off.
You can't unsee it!  [/Voice of Interest]


Also, yeah, that gold looks pretty obnoxious to me.  Of course, I'll have to get some pics of my strat when I get the neck finished...
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Nodaisho

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1583 on: 10 Mar 2008, 16:32 »

I think the gold hardware might look better if it was white, and the gold was just like engraving on the guitar, less is more when it comes to gold.

I dunno about the yellowing, I haven't thought about that, but I don't think yellow and gold would go together so well.
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Patrick

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1584 on: 10 Mar 2008, 16:34 »

(Deluxe Players' Strat)

Dude Gene you have no idea how much I want one of those things. Seriously? You can use any Strat pickup combination you could ever want. Ever. I would shell out the $600 for it just because it has the ability to provide every sound my Squier makes and then some. I still despise the gold, and I would probably do another paint job a-la my Squier.

This is going to happen after I buy a Sheraton, a Jag, a new computer, a Vox AC-100 + 4x12 cab, etcetera.
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sean

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1585 on: 10 Mar 2008, 17:22 »

He doesn't play guitar, just buys and sells them for profit

Man that is just not cool. Guitars are expensive enough already, I don't need some dude selling me an overpriced instrument.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1586 on: 10 Mar 2008, 17:49 »

Yeah, gold hardware's usually pretty tacky, but sometimes it's just right.

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1587 on: 10 Mar 2008, 18:15 »

(Deluxe Players' Strat)

Dude Gene you have no idea how much I want one of those things. Seriously? You can use any Strat pickup combination you could ever want. Ever. I would shell out the $600 for it just because it has the ability to provide every sound my Squier makes and then some. I still despise the gold, and I would probably do another paint job a-la my Squier.

This is going to happen after I buy a Sheraton, a Jag, a new computer, a Vox AC-100 + 4x12 cab, etcetera.

Why would you ruin that finish??  That is a beautiful instrument, except for the gross gold hardware.  I do agree it works on some guitars, though.
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Nodaisho

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1588 on: 10 Mar 2008, 19:49 »

Yeah, gold hardware's usually pretty tacky, but sometimes it's just right.


Sometimes it is just the right amount of tacky, you mean?
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1589 on: 10 Mar 2008, 19:55 »

Who had the bad taste to make that thing for prince?
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1590 on: 10 Mar 2008, 19:58 »

Someone that probably got a lot of money for it.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1591 on: 10 Mar 2008, 20:39 »

Hey, it's a kitschy guitar made for the king of kitsch. It's not like anyone has deluded themselves into thinking that it's a gorgeous instrument.

Just a stage prop, really.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1592 on: 10 Mar 2008, 22:54 »

Bear in mind Prince is an amazing musician with most intruments, but is specially bitchin on the guitar.
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Ballard

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1593 on: 10 Mar 2008, 23:30 »

Oh, I wasn't underwriting his playing ability at all. Just underlining the fact that the shape exists for added entertainment.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1594 on: 11 Mar 2008, 01:10 »

Guys, I think Gibsons with gold hardware are ridiculously sexy.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1595 on: 11 Mar 2008, 03:49 »

Someone that probably got a lot of money for it.

I want to say Dean.
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doombilly

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1596 on: 11 Mar 2008, 04:21 »

Gold hardware is easily the tackiest thing imaginable this side of a drunken Ibanez/BC Rich hookup
Agreed. I just hate Gold gardwareon anything. And after the guitar is 5 minutes old the "gold" starts to look like crap. Acceptable hardware colors: Chrome, Black, or like some kind of brushed bare metal. gold hardware is the spinner of guitar affectations.
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1597 on: 11 Mar 2008, 06:18 »

Why would you ruin that finish??  That is a beautiful instrument, except for the gross gold hardware.  I do agree it works on some guitars, though.

Because transparent red is reserved for Gibson. Fender is the brand you buy new and bash up over time, Gibson is the brand you change diapers for all it's life. If I am getting a Fender I am not getting it for the 'gorgeous finish'.
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doombilly

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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1598 on: 11 Mar 2008, 07:00 »

yeah I dunno KimJong. I mean actually my old Pawn Shop Mustang looks kind of good with the scars. I feel pretty certain if a gibson had sustained that level of abuse it would be in a dumpster or 'parts.'

I think the only Gibsons I like are the ES series. And like the really old models.
Like:

EDIT: EXCEPT THE GOLD #@$^@$%& HARDWARE!!!!11
But if I had to be too careful with it, meh...
« Last Edit: 11 Mar 2008, 07:03 by doombilly »
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Re: The Guitar Topic
« Reply #1599 on: 11 Mar 2008, 08:08 »

Pawn. Shop. Mustang.

Those are the three greatest words ever.
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