Aloha!
I'm throwing down on this Sweepstakes 4 Sho'.
Fair Maiden, if your looking for a Prom for the ages, then I may be your man.
Not only do I look positively dashing in a suit, tuxedo, or Utility Kilt, I could more than likely power a small town for a few days with the energy produced from my Move Busting capabilities. I call this the Nuclear Groove Effect.
At age 20, 6'1, I feel I fall into the Physical and Chronological qualifications quite nicely, but that's not all.
At my High School, before I went to my own Sr. Prom, I was two different girl's "Security Date", meaning they couldn't get a real date for whatever reasons, and KNEW that bringing me guaranteed a Baller Evening, so I went to a Sr. prom three years in a row, and I know what makes a good one vs. a bad one (Hint: Getting the DJ to play "The Thong Song" is basically a guaranteed excellent time). I can and will chit chat with all your friends and make sure they're having a great time as well (In Philadelphia, I do some freelance party promotion, and have about two years of "Making sure everyone is enjoying themselves" experience). I can seriously make talk SO SMALL that it is invisible to the naked eye.
I have personally been responsible for at least three "Most Magical Night of My Life"s as well as no less than two "A Summer I would Never Forget"s, although, obviously, for the purposes of this event I certainly have to dust off the "No Monkey Business/Perfect Gentleman" clause.
I have EXTENSIVE experience making my date's friends and peers jealous, and I also come with the optional "Point out the bitchiest bitch in your school that you hate and I will give her a severe dressing down a'la Brian from that episode of Family Guy where he does that at Meg's Prom to Connie Dimico" Package.
Last but not least, I'd like to think of myself as a relatively cool guy, and if some Prince Charming comes in halfway through and sweeps you off your feet, I would be thrilled, although I'd have to slink off like Charlie in that episode of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia where basically that same thing happens to him.
Don't know if I can compete with Hella Corsages though. That is one super smooth Mac Daddy move, right there.