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Author Topic: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank  (Read 20849 times)

Spluff

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Showcasing the human race's astounding lack of preparation for the inevitable zombie invasion, signs of the apocalypse have been dismissed as a 'prank', giving those who were foolish enough to brush off the warnings a cheap laugh - whilst the wiser and more knowledgeable of us are now battened down in our super secret anti zombie bunkers with enough food and weaponry to survive for many years, only to emerge in what will hopefully be a faithful recreation of either Mad Max or Fallout 3.

Whether these people are still laughing when their fatal mistake causes them to be eaten by zombies remains to be seen.





http://news.aol.com/article/zombie-road-signs-attack-austin-texas/322482
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Josefbugman

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #1 on: 31 Jan 2009, 14:31 »

Its only the Nazi zombie one that would have had me still going in to work, otherwise I would have believed them.
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Tom

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #2 on: 31 Jan 2009, 14:43 »

Man that is crazy, everyone knows that there is no where to run to.
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Josefbugman

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #3 on: 31 Jan 2009, 14:58 »

Bullpies, I know at least 3 locations I can flee to in case of zombie attack.
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Cartilage Head

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #4 on: 31 Jan 2009, 15:32 »

It’s been 2 weeks since this whole thing started.

It all started with a tanker accident. It was all over the news. Everyone thought it was just another oil spill. There were plenty of volunteers. Plenty of people wanting to help the poor defenseless animals. Plenty of victims. Within hours of the tanker accident, it started happening. The animals had gone crazy, they were scratching and biting the clean up volunteers. They said that it was an adverse effect to whatever was in that tanker.

Rescue workers were still trying to get the crew out of the ship. They could hear screaming inside. Screams to open the doors. But that’s when it all went to hell. As soon as they cut the door out.

There was 6 minutes of broadcast before it went silent. 6 minutes of screaming and agony. The ship crew attacked the rescue workers like rabid baboons. Breaking bones and tearing flesh. The people on the shore weren’t fairing any better. Those that had been attacked by animals were attacking everyone else. It was worse than any war zone report, it was sheer brutality, and yet the broadcast still went on for 6 minutes. 6 minutes and then blank faces. Nobody could explain what was happening. They tried to continue with regular news, the economy, the weather, a cute human interest story, but they couldn’t make us unsee what we saw.

I tried to continue with my regular existence but every time I switched on the news or walked by a news stand it was there. This big mystery. They had some explanations, some kind of infection, brain parasites, but it didn’t matter. It wasn’t an infection we were afraid of, it was them.

4 days after the initial report, a state of emergency was raised. And yet we’d all seen this before. Every zombie movie ever. People didn’t know who to trust. People were stockpiling food and weapons. Some tried to flee but it seems every zombie movie was right. They didn’t make it. 3 days later they arrived in my town.

I expected moans, shuffling corpses, dismemberment, but that’s where the movies lied. They ran through the streets, screaming. I remember running to my front door as fast as I could, locking, barricading, doing anything to make sure it would stay shut, and then I headed for the window. I was on the second story and I could see the carnage. They were unstoppable. They were aware.

A group of them made there way through a building across the street. They jumped straight through plate glass windows. Even the shards slicing through them made no difference, they just kept coming. My barricade wasn’t going to hold. I rushed around my flat, grabbing supplies and jamming them into the most secure room of the flat. I went back for one last look across the street, and I wish I hadn’t. In a second story window, my face met one of theirs. They knew where I was. I quickly dashed into the room and locked the door.

I don’t have any kind of panic room, or a secure basement, so the safest place I could think of was my bathroom. No windows, one door with a lock. I had filled my sink and bathtub full of water, So I could stay for a while. So I sat there in the dark room, with the distant screams in my ears.

I began to feel like I may have over-reacted, it had been 2 hours and no sign of them. It actually got quieter and I thought they had moved on. Maybe I could leave the room, get to the kitchen. Grab more food to wait it out. A crash came from the front door. The sound of someone running full force into the door and knocking down the barrier behind it. There was a couple more crashes before I knew they were inside. Rapid footsteps moving around the flat, a couple screams and then a bang on the wall beside me. My eyes were open to their widest, even in the pitch black darkness of the room. Another bang, and another. They knew I was there and they knew I was scared.

This was the zombie nightmare I had been expecting from the start. I had nowhere to run. There was only so much time before they would break in. I sat with my back to the door, hoping my extra weight would make it harder for them to get in. And then it got worse.
“why don’t you open the door?”

A voice on the opposite side of the door. No screams or moans, just a quiet, whispery voice. And then more of them.

“we’ve come for you.”
“you’ll be happier if you open the door”
“it’s not so bad…”

The whispery voices, became a cacophony of noise trying to persuade me, to break me, to fool me. I had heard that the moaning of zombies would drive people insane but this was worse, a siren call. I sat in the darkness and hoped and prayed that they’d get bored. But they don’t get bored and they don’t leave. I managed to use the mirror to peak under the door, only to be greeted by horrible unblinking eyes, blood smeared faces, screams and more horrible whispers. That was two days ago…

I don’t know what to do anymore… maybe it won’t be so bad…
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Patrick

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #5 on: 31 Jan 2009, 15:41 »

My friends all think I'm crazy for wanting to buy a Glock .357, but they have no idea how serious this threat is.
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Mr. Skawronska

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #7 on: 31 Jan 2009, 15:44 »

As a lurker/poster at Zombie Squad, America's Premier Mobile Cadaver Suppression Task Force, I can safely say that I and every level of membership of Zombie Squad is prepared at some level for the impending Zombie Apocalypse.

Admittedly, some of us are more prepared than others.

I myself consider myself an Armorer and a Medic.  I have a BoB, BoV, BoL, and I can instruct in those and other cool acronyms.  I know CPR, PALS, ACLS, PHTLS, AMLS, and a whole bunch of other letters put together in funny ways.  I know how to work on an AR-15, M-16, M-14, SU-16, Sub-2000, G17, G19, G26, G34, G37, P-11, PF-9, 24/7, 10/22, and a 1974 Pinto.  I can consistently my shot from a rifle at 50 yards with a quarter, and have enough ammunition to comfortably supply a rabid platoon of hyenas if they're not too choosy as to caliber.

the Zeds don't scare me;  I'm an expert -- we talk about this on Teh Intarweb!

Put the spotlight on 'em, and as Great Teacher Largo from Megatokyo says: ""GO FOR T3H H3DZ"

Now if you'll excuse me, "I GOTTA PICK UP A ZILL4 AND MORE DUCT TAPE"

S
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Josefbugman

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #8 on: 31 Jan 2009, 15:59 »

Every day it just keeps on getting worse, the things are attacking us, even here, even here where we thought we were safe. They surround us, thousands upon thousands, maws open, hands outstreched in a vile parody of an embrace.

But we are humans, we are not going gently into this dark night. They tried to break through the doors again, the faster ones, the ones that lead them they came first, running up the closed gates and whispering, twelve of them died in 10 seconds. Then the slow ones came, a rushing horde of anger and moaning, they died too but we could afford to pick our shots, we thought that they were trying to build a ramp up to the ramparts with the dead. They hadn't counted on some well placed molotovs.

We have enough food to last for 3 months, after that I don't know, london has already fallen, 9 million people all of them dead and all of them making their way to us. I have heard nothing from the three other forts that make up the route, the lights are going out all over Europe and unlike our grandparents, who thought they would not be lit in their lifetime, these will simply never be lit.

Only so much can be done, already we have killed thousands, with booby traps, with staves, with bullets and with our bare hands if neccesary. Its not enough, nothing like enough. Then night falls and the whispering begins the tempting offers of sweet oblivion and peace. I saw a little girl, no older than 12 jump from the walls screaming to parents who were holding their hands up to her, I could not see what happened to her in the dark night, but the softest of sighs. I haven't told anyone, I don't think she was even missed.

Worry is set up over all of us like a miasma, too much too soon and there is no hope, how can we kill all of them? Forays into the wilderness have been met with gutted patrols and stronger whispers.

I will volunteer for the next patrol, and hope against hope that we can survive this assault on humanity.

Vae Victus- Woe to the vanquished
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Spluff

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #9 on: 31 Jan 2009, 16:04 »

The only glock I would be using is this one.
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Melodic

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #10 on: 31 Jan 2009, 16:05 »

My friends all think I'm crazy for wanting to buy a Glock .357, but they have no idea how serious this threat is.

I think you are pretty crazy too. Glock doesn't have .357 caliber varieties.

G31, 32, 33. Don't worry though, he's still crazy.
« Last Edit: 31 Jan 2009, 16:10 by Melodic »
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Josefbugman

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #11 on: 31 Jan 2009, 16:10 »

mhmmm, you want a hunting rifle and a shaolin spade.
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Melodic

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #12 on: 31 Jan 2009, 16:10 »

Jens are you saying that my dick is not a lethal weapon.
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Patrick

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #13 on: 31 Jan 2009, 16:58 »

Man do you even know the ballistic capabilities of a Glock 31? If it can take out a black bear with a headshot, it can take out any punk bitch zombie.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #14 on: 31 Jan 2009, 17:10 »

Bullpies, I know at least 3 locations I can flee to in case of zombie attack.

Tell us. Tell us where they are.

Teeeeeeeeeeelllllll uuuuuuuusssssss.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #15 on: 31 Jan 2009, 17:16 »

I completely just imagined Harry outside of Cory's bathroom going "Open the dooooor. It won't be so baaaad".
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Josefbugman

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #16 on: 31 Jan 2009, 17:17 »

I don't want to, but the voices are so pervasive.

No chance deadhead.
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #17 on: 31 Jan 2009, 17:19 »

The problem with a pistol is that it isn't a rifle. The ammo is also pretty heavy, as ammo goes. The lack of a stock is a problem, and the short sight radius is as well. Unless you are Todd Jarrett or Jerry Miculek, grab a rifle. But you know what? They would go for a rifle first, as well.

I have been convinced that the best weapon for the zombocalypse is an AKS-74U (or semi-auto clone). Actually, the best weapon for the zombocalypse would be an orbital nuke, that is the only way to make sure, but I would have difficulties finding an orbital nuke.

A hunting rifle (depending on the caliber) uses larger rounds than you need, weighs more than you need it to weigh, and the bolt action is not an advantage, no matter what Max Brooks says. Unless you are at extremely long ranges, but if that is the case, you probably don't need to be shooting the zombie. The AKS-74U is light, less than 6 pounds empty, all steel and wood, ammo is all over the place (in the US, and other places with relatively lax gun laws), but not in high demand, because everyone "knows" that for combat, 5.56 is better. It doesn't matter when you have to get headshots anyway, though. Ammo is lightweight, the gun is accurate enough to get headshots out to about 200 meters or yards, and the tube steel stock is capable of bashing heads in better than a polymer stock. Not as good as an old world-war vintage rifle for bashing, but that would be much heavier, use heavier ammo, might be bolt action, and would have less ammo capacity.

For a hand-to-hand weapon, I'd want something small, blunt, and heavy. Maybe a hatchet of some sort, with something over the blade? Then you would be able to cut wood, skin and butcher animals if necessary, and have a nice back-up weapon as well, if you have screwed up and lost your gun.

What I would want most, though, is a bunker with a backup generator, a backup backup generator, a garden, solar panels, wind turbines, truly ridiculous amounts of ammo, enough MREs to feed a dozen people for a few years, enough water to last for years (possibly an underground water source? Would need some sort of filtration method to avoid virus contamination), possibly a big tank of diesel (how long does diesel last? I know gas only lasts 6 months before it starts to run very dirty) and air scrubbers.

edit: Oh, and I forgot another thing about the 74U. In case of nazi zombies, the 5.45 steelcore will go through their helmets like they weren't even there. So would most modern rifle rounds, but pistols would just make a gonging sound. Funny, but ineffective.
« Last Edit: 31 Jan 2009, 17:21 by Nodaisho »
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Blue Kitty

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #18 on: 31 Jan 2009, 17:21 »

People are, "99100 percent sure it is not," viral marketing for Resident Evil 5.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #19 on: 31 Jan 2009, 17:25 »

Hand to hand, I'd like a solidly built machete. I think I'd probably try to hide out on one of the harbor islands close by. There's a wicked current running through Hull gut that would make it very difficult for any zombies to reach the island I have in mind.
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #20 on: 31 Jan 2009, 18:27 »

My issue with a sharp object is the blood spatter, which would be greater than with a blunt object.

What about armor? I'm thinking chain mail and leather, possibly kevlar and a steel insert underneath in case of unfriendly living humans. Of course, anyone still surviving is probably pretty good at getting headshots by now, hopefully not so good when someone is shooting back.

I doubt it is marketing for RE5, the nazi zombie comment wouldn't make sense, and I think that hacking into road signs is a bit far across the legal line for a company to endorse for something that obvious.
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Tyler

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #21 on: 31 Jan 2009, 18:28 »

It is clearly marketing for Dead Snow.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #22 on: 31 Jan 2009, 18:37 »

Yeah except there's that "hitting the fucking thing" deal. Have you ever actually fired a pistol?

When you are firing into a crowd of zombies, you would probably have to fire straight up into the sky to not hit something.
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #23 on: 31 Jan 2009, 18:49 »

It is clearly marketing for Dead Snow.
I think I might want to watch that, the previews are pretty funny. Anyone notice someone grabbing a hammer, and then someone else grabbing a sickle in the arming up bit of the trailer?

I think the Nazi zombies bit is more likely to be referencing CoD5, though.

Patrick, remember that hitting isn't enough, you need to hit them in the head. And you don't want the .357 sig, anyway. Ammo is harder to find, it isn't noticeably more powerful than a 9mm, unless you (you all probably don't care about this technical stuff), which doesn't matter on non-living matter, anyway. Go for the 9mm or .40 version, those are the more popular ones, and the 9mm version has 33 round magazines, for when you really don't have time to spend that second and a half reloading.
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Patrick

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #24 on: 31 Jan 2009, 19:22 »

The thing about the .357 coming out of a 5" barrel is that the longer barrel means greater muzzle velocity, and in this case it makes your impact force roughly the same as a .45 would be coming out of a more compact weapon at much shorter range.

Since I'm just working from the little passage Cartilage Head posted, it's unclear whether these zombies are undead, or whether they're just infected with parasites. He did mention that they were not only running, but that they were aware. That to me suggests a living enemy, since if you are undead you are probably a lot less able to move (rigor mortis and shit). If they're living and they're just infected by a parasite (or, like the film version of I Am Legend, an airborne vaccine gone horribly wrong), you have a much more fearsome target, but at the same time a much less hardy one.

The problem with a pistol is that it isn't a rifle. The ammo is also pretty heavy, as ammo goes. The lack of a stock is a problem, and the short sight radius is as well. Unless you are Todd Jarrett or Jerry Miculek, grab a rifle. But you know what? They would go for a rifle first, as well.

The thing about rifles is that they are (not pistols, lolol) much longer and therefore harder to whip out. Ideally, you would have both so that you could grab your pistol, start firing at random so that the impact of the bullets forces some of them to fall over backward (hence my preference of the relatively large caliber with high muzzle velocity), causing them to trip over each other, giving you a chance to run. Then as soon as you empty your mag, you'll hopefully have enough room to start running, pulling back the bolt of your rifle as you whip it out, and blind-firing behind you. Obviously, since the rifle is going to be your main weapon, you will have more ammo for that, but definitely keep a good stockpile of that pistol stuff handy.
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #25 on: 31 Jan 2009, 19:42 »

Well, the thing is that power isn't necessarily important in wounding, with pistols it is the size of the wound channel that matters, with rifles it is argued over whether the hydrostatic shock actually has noticeable effect, and if it makes up for lack of permanent wound channel. The glock 31 only has a 4.5 inch barrel, the most common .45 has a 5 inch barrel in the standard model, with some 4 inch ones, and a few 3" models (there are reliability issues with most of them, which is why they aren't more popular). If they were immune to pain, the issue would be stopping them as quickly as possible, which would either mean crippling (spine severing? shotguns would be good for that.) or killing (headshot), rather than waiting for the bleeding to kill them. Normally, people stop when shot because it hurts like hell. When they don't, it goes very bad.

I would go with a 10mm, assuming I'm not a wimp and can handle the recoil, but would have my rifle out whenever I had the chance. The 74U is very small, less than 20" with the stock folded, and it doesn't extend more than 4 inches past your front hand. I would also go with carrying a round in the chamber and having the safety on for rifles as well as pistols, that allows one more round before reloading the first time, and there really isn't any danger of them going off, as long as the safety is on. Sure, have a pistol, but only as a back-up, for when you are in serious shit, but not quite bad enough to need to be going hand-to-hand. In case of the living, crazy, human zombies, I think I'd go with a Saiga-12K rather than the 74, with 10 round magazines of buckshot, it would make headshots easier, and the greater spread makes spine severing more likely as well, if you aim for center of mass (though then they will keep crawling at you, you'll have to stay away long enough for them to bleed out, or finish them).
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #26 on: 31 Jan 2009, 19:51 »

bullets do not make you fly backwards when hit, contrary to popular hollywood method.

I'm not looking for flight, just enough to slow them down enough so that they get bumped into, losing their balance, causing them to trip over and cause a disturbance in the movement of the rest of the horde. That would buy enough time to get your rifle out and ready while you run.
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Spluff

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #27 on: 31 Jan 2009, 19:54 »

pfffft

amateurs




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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #28 on: 31 Jan 2009, 20:05 »

And, if they are too close for you to not get blown up too, just turn around and fire. Mmm, toasty.

Jens, that is a misleading link. The force from a handgun bullet is hundreds of foot-pounds, usually upwards of 300 (the caliber he mentioned is between 400 and 500, depending on loading). If it transferred all of that as a push, someone would get slowed down. The problem is that bullets don't do that, they put their energy into penetration rather than pushing.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #29 on: 31 Jan 2009, 20:10 »

Let's go back a second here to the pain theory, then. I just don't quite think I agree with the idea that they don't feel pain. If they are aware, to me that sounds like they've got sufficient neurological function to do just that. And given that they've got parasites affecting their instinctive reactions to make them attack any living thing to get the meat off of it, I would imagine that not only are their feeding instincts amplified, the neural mechanisms for their survival instincts would be sharpened as well.

Back to the forces in question with handguns: say you aim for the legs. Do you think that would be enough of a slowdown to make them trip up? If not, do you just aim in the general direction of their heads and empty the shit out of that pistol and hope one of them dies, causing the same domino effect?
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #30 on: 31 Jan 2009, 20:18 »

Shooting one in the leg might cause it to slow, especially if you break the leg. This is assuming that they aren't so ridiculously tense that their muscles would prevent the leg front collapsing.

I assumed that they felt no pain, since he mentioned them going through the window and ignoring the glass they cut themselves on.

If one did fall, you would have to hope that he didn't just get trampled, rather than having them trip on him.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #31 on: 31 Jan 2009, 20:55 »

I'm a little bummed at the idea of not having a domino effect going on. Slowing them down would be

Idunno if that necessarily means they don't feel pain. The urge to feed is a powerful motivator, so I could imagine they could just ignore it for the duration of their hunt and worry later. Since they are aware zombies, it would be very helpful to figure out a way to trap one and study the specimen's psychology.

I wonder if it'd be a good idea to keep ingredients and materials for Works bombs around. Since they are aware, living beings and not undead, their eyes and other senses would be quite useful to them. Having drain cleaner exploding in their faces would damage sight and smell, and the incredibly loud bang a Works bomb gives off could serve as a sort of diversion. If you added nails or broken glass to the outside of your Works bomb somehow, it could possibly cut the zombies' skin enough to cause significant bleeding damage (here's where the armor plan would best come in, you don't want to take any chances), and maybe even poison some of them.

And Works drain cleaner and aluminum foil is also much more readily available than conventional warfare weapons, so stocking up during the incredibly tense, chaotic prelude to the attack would be loads easier than getting guns and ammo.
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #32 on: 31 Jan 2009, 21:00 »

Are you seriously asking yourself if it is a good idea to keep the ingredients for a bomb around?


Of course it's a good idea.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #33 on: 31 Jan 2009, 21:06 »

Are we really going to start up another zombie thread? If this is the case, unlike the prior discussion I have read both The Zombie Survival Guide and World War Z, played both Dead Rising and Left 4 Dead, and me and all of my friends that I hang out with in real life who have their priorities straight have a plan for both escape and remaining stationary within our current hometown.

I don't agree entirely with all of Max Brooks guide, but I don't have it on hand so I'm going to have to wait until tomorrow to really dive into this when I'm back in Maryland.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #34 on: 31 Jan 2009, 21:17 »

If we're gong to have a thread about zombies I would have thought that the done thing would be to revive an old one.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #35 on: 31 Jan 2009, 21:25 »

I don't think it was supposed to turn into the zombie thread again, it just did.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #36 on: 31 Jan 2009, 21:32 »

That thread was about undead zombies. These zombies are actually alive and aware (see: the hemocytes in the film version of I Am Legend, except it hasn't been clarified whether they are incapable of survival in sunlight) and are a much different threat, and no guide has been written for them.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #37 on: 31 Jan 2009, 21:54 »

Yeah, but at the same time we've covered both "slow" and "fast" zombies a la 28 Days later pretty extensively in that other thread as well. The ones from I am Legend were also hardly self-aware, I mean, the ones from the book were, but then the book was about vampires specifically, and the original Film adaptation The Last Man On Earth had the kind from the book that went self-aware enough to try and fight their own disease, but the "slow" vampires from that one actually went on to inspire George Romero's Night of the Living Dead which in turn revolutionized the Post apocalyptic and zombie movie genres, which up until recently the staple was primarily of the "slow" kind.

You following me?
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Yeah, I mean, "I won't kill and eat you if you won't kill and eat me" is typically a ground rule for social groups.

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #38 on: 31 Jan 2009, 21:58 »

The ones from I Am Legend are vampires goddammit.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #39 on: 31 Jan 2009, 22:11 »

In the film version, they were able to be killed (I love that phrase, it is a hell of an ability) by reg'lur ol' gunshot wounds, could feel pain, and were obviously bright enough to rebuild the same trap he used on them. I am using them as a model for right now.
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #40 on: 31 Jan 2009, 22:36 »

The nazi zombies wouldn't be alive, would they? It doesn't say neo-nazi zombies. Or... wheelchair-riding nonagenarian zombies? We're doomed!
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #41 on: 31 Jan 2009, 22:37 »

Rule 1. No automatic weapons. Even if they have a single shot capability, the temptation for many people, will be to open up on full auto and waste ammo.
Rule 2. Keep a secondary weapon. A pistol of some sort, a .22 is ideal, small caliber, light, accurate at the distance for which you will need it, and no where near as noisy as a 9mil or a .45 or the other more common calibers.
Rule 3. You need a melee weapon. There is no substitute for skull splitting or cracking power when it comes down to the crunch. A small metal club, or a mchete, or even some sore of customised fist weapon if you can get it.
Rule 4. Keep water. Rule of threes, 3 minutes without air, 3 days without water, 3 weeks without food.
Rule 5. Leather is your friend. It's light, and very difficult for teeth and fingernails to get through if you have the genuine article.
Rule 6. If you have to engage, do it from the nearest high ground, it provides a good vantage point, and zombies are poor climber, any high ground will do, even on top of an SUV.
Rule 7. Keep your eyes and ears open at all times.
Rule 8. Try to make the best use of your melee weapon, ammo will be hard to find in a post apocalyptic world.
Rule 9. The final rule, if it's shuffling and doesn't talk, shoot first and ask questions later.

Ideally in terms of primary weapons, I would recommend one of these 3


Gewehr-43

M1 Garand

SVT-40
« Last Edit: 31 Jan 2009, 23:02 by Iron_Fist »
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Jace

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #42 on: 31 Jan 2009, 22:55 »

mhmmm, you want a hunting rifle and a shaolin spade.

I want to diffuse this right here.

If you're referring to this, then you are better off carrying a shovel. That is all that the monk's spade is. It does not have sharpenend ends, it is a long blunt object. Generally it is used in a swinging motion, and the sides are not sharp, they are thick and blunt. Even the end isn't that sharp, but you are better off with a machette, katana, basically any kind of slashing weapon is better than the monk's spade. My roommate owns one, I have seen the form that goes with it, there is very little slashing and a whole lot of swinging. If you want something that has a blade on the end and is still a polearm, a Quan Dao or Pudao is what you are looking for.

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #43 on: 31 Jan 2009, 22:58 »

Is that bloody spade cited in the damn survivor guide or something (I've never read it)? Because it's silly how often it gets brought up. I hate how people always start pulling out "customized fist weapons" and shaolin spaces etc. when talking about melee weapons in general, actually. I mean, how many people here know weapon smiths and have actually trained with something? As long as you're going to go be swinging away at something like a clumsy oaf, you may as well take something that doubles as a useful tool rather than a one trick pony. I'd suggest a hooligan bar. At least it'll give you some more help when trying to break into potential shelter.
« Last Edit: 31 Jan 2009, 23:01 by Alex C »
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #44 on: 31 Jan 2009, 23:21 »

Rule 1. No automatic weapons. Even if they have a single shot capability, the temptation for many people, will be to open up on full auto and waste ammo.

That right there is one that I have issue with. At least you didn't say use a manually-operated gun (pump, bolt, lever), because this is a matter more of training and discipline than effectiveness. If you could get your hands on them, two or three belt-fed automatics would be an absolute life-saver in case of a big horde, if you had a small angle. Have each person aim at a few inches different level, and sweep back and forth on that level as they fire.

As long as they can manage the recoil, that would cover all but the most extreme differences in height, allowing at least one of you to get a headshot on anyone that isn't a midget or Andre the Giant. Andre would be pulling himself towards you on his hands, due to having his spine severed by repeated sweeps, and the midget would be walking on corpses before long, making him tall enough to get shot without changing the field of fire. Alternately, have a fourth person taking shots at anyone still moving, or outside of the range of the fire. The main difficulty here is getting your hands on three belt-feds.

Quote
Rule 2. Keep a secondary weapon. A pistol of some sort, a .22 is ideal, small caliber, light, accurate at the distance for which you will need it, and no where near as noisy as a 9mil or a .45 or the other more common calibers.

.22s are good. Ammo is light, extremely common (it is frequently packaged in boxes of 500 or more), it is accurate as far as it will shoot (you can hit out to 200 meters with it, though holdover would be a pain, and I wouldn't trust it to punch a skull), small game can be hunted with it for food, but one thing about that bit bothers me.

Guns are loud. Period. Doesn't matter the caliber, they are loud. Get the supplies to make suppressors the first chance you get when you know the zombies are coming. The Anarchist's cookbook has a diagram of one, but that one is outdated, look on the internet. Find a way to attach them to your gun, if it doesn't have threading, improvise. It's even better if you have an integrally suppressed gun, but those aren't common, except among the most enthusiastic of gun collectors. Brits and most non-USers have the advantage here, actually, they don't have laws against suppressors (I believe they are sometimes called mufflers over there, like on a car). If you are in the US, get your hands on one or make one as soon as you can, if you live long enough to be charged with illegally making a class III firearm, you have already succeeded.

Quote
Rule 3. You need a melee weapon. There is no substitute for skull splitting or cracking power when it comes down to the crunch. A small metal club, or a mchete, or even some sore of customised fist weapon if you can get it.
Melee weapons are good, though your rifle's stock should be capable of doing the job, unless you have a nylon stock. What is a customized fist weapon? A gauntlet? Punch dagger? I like the idea of a gauntlet, but it would be hard to find, and probably a bit awkward to operate the rifle with it. Alex's Hooligan bar idea is a damn good one, I also like the machete, hatchet, or kukri (if you can find one), you will need to cut wood to survive when it gets cold, unless you are staying in a city. The aforementioned weapons also are more designed for placing the force of the impact in one place, making it more effective.

Quote
Rule 4. Keep water. Rule of threes, 3 minutes without air, 3 days without water, 3 weeks without food.
Rule 5. Leather is your friend. It's light, and very difficult for teeth and fingernails to get through if you have the genuine article.
Good rules, though you wouldn't be at your full capabilities for the last one (or even two) of those threes. Leather is very good, it doesn't matter if you look like a gay biker, the zombies won't care about how you look, just how difficult it is to get to your tasty flesh. If the zombies rely on sight, see if you can get some form of camouflage clothing over the leather, and learn how to use it well. A ghille suit would be even better, assuming you would be still, but those get hot as hell, and take a lot of work.

Quote
Rule 6. If you have to engage, do it from the nearest high ground, it provides a good vantage point, and zombies are poor climber, any high ground will do, even on top of an SUV.
This one, I'm assuming you mean if you aren't able to retreat while engaging, otherwise distance is your friend, it prevents you from being surrounded. If the zombies make sounds to attract others, though, take them out before they make a noise, if at all possible.

Quote
Rule 7. Keep your eyes and ears open at all times.
Rule 8. Try to make the best use of your melee weapon, ammo will be hard to find in a post apocalyptic world.
Rule 9. The final rule, if it's shuffling and doesn't talk, shoot first and ask questions later.
Pretty good rules here, rule 7 I agree with whole-heartedly, rule 8 I think largely depends on the person. I happen to know some people have ammunition stockpiles that would make Burt Gummer green with envy, and nice secluded houses, or friends with secluded houses, and trucks to carry all the ammo. Those people, who have hundreds of thousands of rounds, they are probably fine shooting everything. Everyone else, kill it without shooting when it won't put you in much danger. Rule 9, I would be hesitant about, but that is why I will end up bitten for being too nice of a guy.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #45 on: 31 Jan 2009, 23:48 »

Zombie games have skewed my vision on what a zombie apocalypse would be like.  A rifle would work well at range, but in a post-apocalyptic world, you're not fighting zombies at range, them bitches are right up on you.  Therefore fuck your rifles and handguns, I'm going with one of these.
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Nodaisho

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #46 on: 01 Feb 2009, 00:26 »

I am unsure of the reliability of the AA12, I'd rather have the Saiga-12. The reason I would go for a rifle is weight. Shotgun shells are heavy all get-out, at least an ounce, usually at least an ounce and a quarter of lead, for each shot, ignoring the powder, primer, wad, and case. Assuming you need a headshot, the zombie will be just as dead with one rifle round in it as a dozen balls of 00 buck. it is probably easier to get a headshot with a shotgun, but not very much easier. Some sort of reflex sight or red dot would make it easier as well, but I would be worried about batteries with most of them, I'd want something that didn't use batteries, maybe tritium, both on the iron sights of my pistol, irons of my rifle, and the glass on the rifle.

edit: Oh, if you were thinking the shaolin spade was something actually similar to a spade (I did), go for an entrenching tool. Works as a shovel, a blunt instrument, and a sharp weapon.
« Last Edit: 01 Feb 2009, 00:35 by Nodaisho »
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Josefbugman

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #47 on: 01 Feb 2009, 02:00 »

yeah, but the shaolin spade is lighter, with longer reach and you can use both ends on the living dead.

Also if its fast zombies your up against? Head for the sea and live on an oil rig, they will burn out faster than your usual shufflers.
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clockworkjames

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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #48 on: 01 Feb 2009, 03:05 »



Go nuts, this gets fun.
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Re: Dire warnings of the apocalypse mistaken for prank
« Reply #49 on: 01 Feb 2009, 03:23 »

I guess if you want to hit zombies in the head with a piece of metal, then yes, it would work better, but you will not be severing anything whatsoever when using a monks spade. It is not a sharp object. You can use it all you want. I'll use a quan dao or nan dao
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