THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)

  • 21 Apr 2024, 01:12
  • Welcome, Guest
Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: [1] 2   Go Down

Author Topic: The Epic Portal Update  (Read 28310 times)

Ozymandias

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,497
The Epic Portal Update
« on: 01 Mar 2010, 21:58 »

If you haven't noticed, there was a sudden, mysterious update to Portal today with only one description:

Changed radio transmission frequency to comply with federal and state spectrum management regulations.


A new achievement also appeared with it simply titled "Transmission Complete" with a description of "...?"

What changed is simply this: there are now 26 radios hidden throughout the game. Each one has a signal location tied to it where if you take the radio to the location you hear a strange broadcast and unlock 1/26th of the achievement.

4 of them were in morse code and read:

INTERIOR TRANSMISSION ACTIVE EXTERNAL DATA LINE ACTIVE MESSAGE DIGEST ACTIVE
9E107D9D372BB6826BD81D3542AV19D6 (which is MD5 hash for "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog")
SYSTEM DATA DUMP ACTIVE USER BACKUP ACTIVE PASSWORD BACKUP ACTIVE
BEEP BEEEEP BEEP BEEP BEEEEP BEEEEP BEEEEP BEEP BEEEEP BEEP BEEP (which is, in turn, morse code for LOL)

The remaining 22 were weird whining noises. These were encrypted images. Some of them were simple images of disturbing things, a human skull, the valve guy, a view through a sniper scope. Some of them were pieces of paper with a BBS number scribbled out.

The rest were divided into 4 and numbered.

When spelled out, you get 9459C6CAC8C203B8128B7CC63068D4FD, which is MD5 hash for a phone number: (425) 822-5251. This phone number is in Kirkland, Washington, where Valve began. Trying it with the other pictures, it was figured to be a BBS number.

And here is where the search has ended.


EDIT: And just now someone figured out the username/password:





An ASCII GLaDOS?

Basically, the assumption is that Valve is announcing Portal 2 and maybe HL: Episode 3 in the most badass way possible.
« Last Edit: 01 Mar 2010, 22:30 by Ozymandias »
Logged
You are 9/11.
You are the terrorist.

KvP

  • WoW gold miner on break
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 6,599
  • COME DOWN NOW
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #1 on: 01 Mar 2010, 23:35 »

That is indeed an ARG. Pretty nice.
Logged
I review, sometimes.
Quote from: Andy
I love this vagina store!
Quote from: Andy
SNEAKY
I sneak that shit
And liek
OMG DICK JERK

messeduplilkid

  • Larger than most fish
  • **
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 100
    • TheRoarer.
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #2 on: 02 Mar 2010, 01:30 »

Ozy thanks for the update, I heard about this yesterday, but didn't get to check it out.

I assumed it was just going to be a viral dealy. I really hope it's for portal 2 or episode 3. It'd really make the first half of the year, so completely unexpected and out of the blue.

Keep us posted!
Logged

Melodic

  • Only pretending to work
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,115
  • archive chin panties
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #3 on: 02 Mar 2010, 01:37 »

announcement?


shurely yew must be mistakeen
Logged
And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

est

  • this is a test
  • Admin emeritus
  • Older than Moses
  • *
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,157
  • V O L L E Y B A L L
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #4 on: 02 Mar 2010, 01:38 »

Well, obviously they're saying there's a backup of GLaDOS, so either it's some sort of DLC where GLaDOS is brought back online, or it's a sequel.  Either way, totally awesome :)
Logged

pilsner

  • Scrabble hacker
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,449
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #5 on: 02 Mar 2010, 03:56 »

If they release DLC for a 4 hour computer game, I am personally going to Valve headquarters and slapping Gabe Newell with my cock.  His name is Bob, and he's particularly tetchy after a long flight, so I suspect he will scratch Gabe quite seriously about the face and neck.

As for HL3, not that I'm not happy, but what the fuck have they been doing for 2 years, I want my periodic content already.
Logged

David_Dovey

  • Nearly grown up
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 8,451
  • j'accuse!
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #6 on: 02 Mar 2010, 05:28 »

How the fuck do you find it in yourself to complain about this for fuck's sake
Logged
It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

A Wet Helmet

  • Beyoncé
  • ****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 717
  • The war against lolcats begins now
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #7 on: 02 Mar 2010, 05:33 »

As much as I enjoyed Portal-- and I did-- Please let it be HL3.   I just might wet myself.   HL2 is easily my favorite single player shooter of all time.  I still fire it up with a fair bit of regularity despite the fact that it's starting to look a little dated.
Logged

Inlander

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,152
  • Hug your local saintly donkey.
    • Instant Life Substitute
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #8 on: 02 Mar 2010, 05:34 »

what the fuck have they been doing for 2 years, I want my periodic content already.

Every 2 years is periodic.
Logged

Ozymandias

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,497
Logged
You are 9/11.
You are the terrorist.

Boro_Bandito

  • William Gibson's Babydaddy
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,270
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #10 on: 02 Mar 2010, 11:19 »

That seriously looks like a Portal sequel to me, especially from those pictures. they just seem to fit that aesthetic.
Logged
Yeah, I mean, "I won't kill and eat you if you won't kill and eat me" is typically a ground rule for social groups.

Ozymandias

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,497
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #11 on: 02 Mar 2010, 11:23 »

I don't know why people keep jumping to the conclusion that an ARG added to Portal indicates that they're announcing Portal 2.
Logged
You are 9/11.
You are the terrorist.

Scandanavian War Machine

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,159
  • zzzzzzzz
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #12 on: 02 Mar 2010, 11:27 »

Look at that one towards the left side, that looks like an anthropomorphized GLaDOS holding hands with...another anthropomorphized GLaDOS.

her twin perhaps? Or maybe it's her husband MelVIN?


either way, Portal 2 seems like a pretty safe bet to me.
Logged
Quote from: KvP
Also I would like to point out that the combination of Sailor Moon and faux-Kerouac / Sonic Youth spelling is perhaps the purest distillation of what this forum is that we have yet been presented with.

Boro_Bandito

  • William Gibson's Babydaddy
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,270
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #13 on: 02 Mar 2010, 12:16 »

Not to mention the one in the middle that looks like a picture of an object going through a portal
Logged
Yeah, I mean, "I won't kill and eat you if you won't kill and eat me" is typically a ground rule for social groups.

Melodic

  • Only pretending to work
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,115
  • archive chin panties
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #14 on: 02 Mar 2010, 15:13 »

HL3? You guys are forgetting about Episode 3 already!
Logged
And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

Scandanavian War Machine

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,159
  • zzzzzzzz
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #15 on: 02 Mar 2010, 15:14 »

i'm pretty sure Valve are the only people who haven't forgotten about Episode 3.

they came out with Portal and I was like "Half-what?! Never heard of it!"
Logged
Quote from: KvP
Also I would like to point out that the combination of Sailor Moon and faux-Kerouac / Sonic Youth spelling is perhaps the purest distillation of what this forum is that we have yet been presented with.

JD

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,803
  • The Phallussar
Logged
Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

Mein Tumblr

Blue Kitty

  • WoW gold miner on break
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 6,964
    • Twitter
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #17 on: 02 Mar 2010, 19:08 »

Does this have anything to do with the 360 version?
Logged

JD

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,803
  • The Phallussar
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #18 on: 02 Mar 2010, 19:36 »

Maybe!
Logged
Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

Mein Tumblr

JD

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,803
  • The Phallussar
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #19 on: 02 Mar 2010, 19:41 »



Look a woman holding a gun
Logged
Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

Mein Tumblr

Inlander

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,152
  • Hug your local saintly donkey.
    • Instant Life Substitute
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #20 on: 02 Mar 2010, 20:04 »

Look a woman holding a . . . something
Logged

JD

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,803
  • The Phallussar
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #21 on: 02 Mar 2010, 21:24 »

Chell holding the portal gun?
Logged
Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

Mein Tumblr

Ozymandias

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,497
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #22 on: 02 Mar 2010, 22:09 »

Well, Chell's right handed and that person's left handed.

Alyx is right handed too, though, sadly. I was mildly hopeful.
Logged
You are 9/11.
You are the terrorist.

JD

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,803
  • The Phallussar
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #23 on: 02 Mar 2010, 22:11 »

Maybe she's ambidextrous
Logged
Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

Mein Tumblr

BeoPuppy

  • ASDFSFAALYG8A@*& ^$%O
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,679
  • Scare a moose, will you do the fandango?
    • Me.
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #24 on: 03 Mar 2010, 01:10 »

Maybe they fucked up.
Logged
My Art.
I was into Stumpy and the Cuntfarts before they sold out.

LTK

  • Methuselah's mentor
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 5,009
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #25 on: 03 Mar 2010, 02:50 »

Maybe it's a view of her back.
Logged
Quote from: snalin
I just got the image of a midwife and a woman giving birth swinging towards each other on a trapeze - when they meet, the midwife pulls the baby out. The knife juggler is standing on the floor and cuts the umbilical cord with a a knifethrow.

FIXDIX

  • Pneumatic ratchet pants
  • ***
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 306
  • Waka waka flocka flame
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #26 on: 03 Mar 2010, 03:08 »

Her back has some pretty mean titties.
Logged

LTK

  • Methuselah's mentor
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 5,009
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #27 on: 03 Mar 2010, 03:24 »

Er... Well, it's ASCII, can you blame me?
Logged
Quote from: snalin
I just got the image of a midwife and a woman giving birth swinging towards each other on a trapeze - when they meet, the midwife pulls the baby out. The knife juggler is standing on the floor and cuts the umbilical cord with a a knifethrow.

sean

  • Vulcan 3-D Chess Master
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 3,730
  • welp
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #28 on: 03 Mar 2010, 12:26 »

man, this thread.

lol
Logged
- 20% of canadians are members of broken social scene

Buttfranklin

  • Cthulhu f'tagn
  • ****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 532
  • bruce
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #29 on: 03 Mar 2010, 12:36 »

God, viral marketing is annoying.
Logged
I tried to romance a lady photographer once. But it didn't work out because I could never understand about f-spots.

LTK

  • Methuselah's mentor
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 5,009
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #30 on: 03 Mar 2010, 16:02 »

Also, Portal has a new ending. I don't know what it is, and I'm going to reinstall the game as soon as I can to find out myself. Getting out of this thread now.
Logged
Quote from: snalin
I just got the image of a midwife and a woman giving birth swinging towards each other on a trapeze - when they meet, the midwife pulls the baby out. The knife juggler is standing on the floor and cuts the umbilical cord with a a knifethrow.

Scandanavian War Machine

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,159
  • zzzzzzzz
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #31 on: 03 Mar 2010, 16:13 »

Yeah, I just watched the new ending on Youtube and it's gettin me pretty hyped for (hopefully) Portal 2.
Logged
Quote from: KvP
Also I would like to point out that the combination of Sailor Moon and faux-Kerouac / Sonic Youth spelling is perhaps the purest distillation of what this forum is that we have yet been presented with.

Blue Kitty

  • WoW gold miner on break
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 6,964
    • Twitter
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #32 on: 04 Mar 2010, 09:32 »

If you haven't seen it, here it is

C'MON GUYS, UPDATE MY 360 VERSION!!
Logged

LTK

  • Methuselah's mentor
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 5,009
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #33 on: 04 Mar 2010, 11:34 »

Been through it two more times while collecting the radios. It's like a little side-quest! Got 24 out of 26 so far. I think there is supposed to be one in every area, but I haven't found the one in test chamber 12 or in the room where dozens pistons thread the upper area.
Logged
Quote from: snalin
I just got the image of a midwife and a woman giving birth swinging towards each other on a trapeze - when they meet, the midwife pulls the baby out. The knife juggler is standing on the floor and cuts the umbilical cord with a a knifethrow.

Emaline

  • Lovecraftian nightmare
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,796
  • Drink, Drank, DRUNK
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #34 on: 04 Mar 2010, 13:22 »

God damn it. I want to play this so bad. But my boyfriend won't let me reinstal portal because it's too big, and they won't update the 360 version. :(
Logged
little bitty bird, with the flaxen hair, can i help you with the weight of the cross you bear?

Chesire Cat

  • Scrabble hacker
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,363
  • Standing proudly behind unpopular opinions
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #35 on: 04 Mar 2010, 20:01 »

This is just too fucking neat!
Logged
"In this zero sum game everything given to another, reduces me"

JD

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,803
  • The Phallussar
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #36 on: 04 Mar 2010, 22:07 »

Logged
Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

Mein Tumblr

Johnny C

  • Mentat
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 9,483
  • i wanna be yr slide dog
    • I AM A WHORE FOR MY OWN MUSIC
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #37 on: 04 Mar 2010, 22:39 »

the new ending made me jump out of my seat and go "HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT"
Logged
[02:12] yuniorpocalypse: let's talk about girls
[02:12] Thug In Kitchen: nooo

LTK

  • Methuselah's mentor
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 5,009
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #38 on: 05 Mar 2010, 03:10 »

I didn't. It's a very straightforward way of saying "You're not done yet." So, yay, Portal 2! I wouldn't count on Ep3, though.

Replaying Portal a few times made me see how well it makes the distinction between a puzzle and an escape. The thing with puzzle games is that every single one of them, ever, has had in mind the solving of the puzzle. That is, the game itself wants you to solve the puzzle for the sake of it, why else are you playing it? When a game's plot makes not the solving puzzles a goal unto itself, but escape or survival instead, it can sometimes break the immersion, simply because everything is so convenient. One would expect Portal to suffer from this too, because it has such a clear-cut distinction between puzzle chambers that exist to be solved, and the area outside the puzzle chambers where you need to escape. But it handles this quite well, actually. Once 'outside', you still need to figure out what to do and where to go, but you don't feel like you're following a given route as much. Of course, you are actually going where the game takes you, this is inescapable in a puzzle game like this, but it does a very good job of suspending disbelief.
Logged
Quote from: snalin
I just got the image of a midwife and a woman giving birth swinging towards each other on a trapeze - when they meet, the midwife pulls the baby out. The knife juggler is standing on the floor and cuts the umbilical cord with a a knifethrow.

scarred

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,440
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #39 on: 05 Mar 2010, 03:17 »

I didn't.

Way to suck the fun out of the moment bro
Logged
tumblr | wordpress | last.fm

Quote from: De_El
nick is a dick so you don't have to be!

Scandanavian War Machine

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,159
  • zzzzzzzz
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #40 on: 05 Mar 2010, 10:42 »

Logged
Quote from: KvP
Also I would like to point out that the combination of Sailor Moon and faux-Kerouac / Sonic Youth spelling is perhaps the purest distillation of what this forum is that we have yet been presented with.

Emaline

  • Lovecraftian nightmare
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,796
  • Drink, Drank, DRUNK
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #41 on: 05 Mar 2010, 11:17 »

what does the underlined stuff mean?!?!?!




Edit: Apparently, it is a login and password for a bbs.

User: drattmann
Password: h0nee


The number to call up the bbs is (425) 822-5251. I have no idea what I'm doing at this point. I know nothing of calling a bbs. But apparently, you need certain software to do it, and I don't think I have that.

But somebody try it! and let me know the results.
« Last Edit: 05 Mar 2010, 11:47 by Emaline »
Logged
little bitty bird, with the flaxen hair, can i help you with the weight of the cross you bear?

A Wet Helmet

  • Beyoncé
  • ****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 717
  • The war against lolcats begins now
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #42 on: 05 Mar 2010, 12:02 »

I know nothing of calling a bbs. But apparently, you need certain software to do it, and I don't think I have that.

Despite the fact that I knew this day would come, you have just made me feel so fucking old it's unbelievable. 
Logged

Emaline

  • Lovecraftian nightmare
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,796
  • Drink, Drank, DRUNK
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #43 on: 05 Mar 2010, 12:08 »

My boyfriend just gave me this same lecture. :-P


I know that BBSs are from the modem days. I know back then you had dial ISPs. I know that back then you could just " pop open a terminal with a command prompt and operate it like that".

But nowadays, that obviously is not the case. And I don't know what to do.


I don't mean to make people feel old. I guess I am just poorly wording it.
Logged
little bitty bird, with the flaxen hair, can i help you with the weight of the cross you bear?

A Wet Helmet

  • Beyoncé
  • ****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 717
  • The war against lolcats begins now
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #44 on: 05 Mar 2010, 12:13 »

No, it's cool.  I'm not saying you did anything to make me feel old.  Fact is, I'm actually getting old!  Until today though, the worst I had been made to feel about it was when one of my kids asked me "How old were you when you got your first cell phone" and was jaw-droppingly shocked when my answer was 28 or 29.

"Dad, you didn't have cell phones when you were a kid"

"No, we had rotary phones.  With cords"

"What are those?"

Yeah... you managed to beat that feeling I got from that.   
Logged

Ozymandias

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,497
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #45 on: 05 Mar 2010, 13:27 »

Just for more info:

Images with the file format ".apf" (Aperture Picture Format) are coming out of the BBS and can only be decoded by a program found through the BBS- written in BASIC.
Logged
You are 9/11.
You are the terrorist.

McTaggart

  • William Gibson's Babydaddy
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,416
  • Positive feedback.
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #46 on: 05 Mar 2010, 13:38 »

I am frankly amazed that people put up with this shit for the sake of being marketed at.
Logged
One day ends and another begins and we're never none the wiser.

Scandanavian War Machine

  • Older than Moses
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4,159
  • zzzzzzzz
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #47 on: 05 Mar 2010, 13:59 »

I'm glad someone puts up with it though. (Hell, maybe they even enjoy it!)

That way I can just sit back and get the distilled info without having to decode the human genome or some shit, because someone ELSE will inevitably do the leg work.
Logged
Quote from: KvP
Also I would like to point out that the combination of Sailor Moon and faux-Kerouac / Sonic Youth spelling is perhaps the purest distillation of what this forum is that we have yet been presented with.

Emaline

  • Lovecraftian nightmare
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,796
  • Drink, Drank, DRUNK
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #48 on: 05 Mar 2010, 14:08 »

Its fun trying to decode it all. It's neat.

I feel like letting other people do all the work is sort of like playing a game and following a walk-through for it to a T. And that just wouldn't be fun.
Logged
little bitty bird, with the flaxen hair, can i help you with the weight of the cross you bear?

JD

  • coprophage
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,803
  • The Phallussar
Re: The Epic Portal Update
« Reply #49 on: 05 Mar 2010, 14:26 »

Holy cow there is gonna be a coop mode auhguhgabauajgahg
Logged
Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

Mein Tumblr
Pages: [1] 2   Go Up