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Yes.

15 (5%)

No, it's not the same.

14 (4.7%)

No, it's even worse.

25 (8.4%)

No, it means Dora's history.

30 (10.1%)

No, because it's going to end different.

19 (6.4%)

No, because there's emergency bourbon.

17 (5.7%)

UBMEOD!

34 (11.4%)

Oh heck, who am I kidding?

4 (1.3%)

(sniff) No, I've just got (sniff) allergies...

31 (10.4%)

This thread is gonna hit 40 pages by tomorrow, isn't it?

109 (36.6%)

Total Members Voted: 237

[jwhouk]

Here's your thread for the week - and what's on all of our minds, of course.  

YMMV, Standard Disclaimers Apply*.

* - Not for use in hot tubs. This product is meant for educational purposes only as students are trapped in classes and can't escape. Any resemblance to real, artificial or simulated persons, living or dead, will be news to us. No living animals were harmed in the filming of this book. May arrive in pieces, some assembly required. Dead batteries included. Use only as directed, and we direct you not to use it. No warranty expressed or even gently squeezed. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment, which suggests a poor future for laptop-based digital maps. Postage will be paid by addressee, and will he ever be surprised. This is not an offer to sell securities, but we certainly hope that won't stop you. Apply only to affected area, but if that looks strange to you, you can apply it to the effected area, too. May be too intense for some viewers, not intense enough for others. Do not stamp, but if you must, stamp gently in your bare feet. Beware of low flying aircraft, even if we can't think any practical thing to do if you happen to see some. Print or type, or have your mother fill it in. For recreational use only as we don't want you to think we're serious. Do not disturb us any further or they will let us out. All models swear they are over 18 years of age. If condition persists, consult your physician; he needs the work. No user serviceable parts inside; we throw it away and start over. Freshest if eaten before date on carton, which doubles as an appetizer. Subject to change without notice, or even unofficial notice: we're winging it. Times approximate after 23:59, December 31, 1999. Simulated picture; your new TV should look almost as good. No postage necessary if hand delivered. Please remain seated until the captain replaces the light in the overhead sign. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement; we'll send a collection agent over immediately. For off-road use only; they'd be nuts to let these loose on the streets. As seen on TV, to the left of the cable box. One size fits all, poorly. Many suitcases look alike, though some look that way uniquely 100% virgin plastic, and stop snickering. Contents may run if wash in hot water, may crawl if washed in cold water. We have sent the forms which your ex-spouse recommended. Slippery when wet, abrasive when dry. For office use only (we write the football pool numbers in that space). Drop in any mailbox and you'll find it cramped. Edited for television by inserting commercials every 10 minutes and chopping off the sides. Keep cool and dry; live on Mars. Post office will not deliver without postage; obstetricians will not deliver without payment. Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward ¬– keep it, we're sick of it. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages, though we do retain rights to any profits you might make.  At participating locations only, if you can find them. Penalty for private use, which differs from general use. Follow all directions on the label, and yes, that means wake up at 2 a.m. and take another one. Substantial withdrawl for early penalty. Do not write below this line, and no coffee stains, either. Falling rock, the lesser Frank Lloyd Wright model home. Lost ticket pays maximum rate, which offers better odds than Lotto. Your canceled check is your receipt, fat lot of good it will do you.  Place stamp here, not there. Avoid contact with skin: levitate. Sanitized for your protection using portable autoclaves. Be sure each item is properly endorsed by a major political party. Your signature is not an admission of guilt, though we'll try and convince the jury otherwise.  Slightly higher west of the Mississippi, much higher west of Texas, practically below sea level in Florida. Employees, their families, and any others who might actually care are not eligible. Beware of dog poop. Limited time offer, operators are standing by waiting for their chairs to be delivered. You must be present to win, and you must win to be invited. No passes accepted for this engagement, but the elopement is free. No purchase necessary means it is necesaary not to purchase. Processed at URL stamped in code on top of carton. Use only in a well-ventilated area near an emergency room. Look for the union label; it shows the best workmanship. Your contribution may be tax deductible if they don't audit. Some equipment shown is optional; some haven't even been manufactured, many pieces are plastic simulations. Price does not include tax, title, shipping, or content.  No Canadian coins except those nifty gold dollars. Not recommended for children of taste. Prerecorded for this time zone by beings from the future. Reproduction strictly prohibited, yet it hasn't prevented population growth. No alcohol, dogs, children or loud shirts. No anchovies that you'll ever be able to detect. Specially packaged for this restaurant by someone with a bottling plant. Absolutely no one will be admitted after start of show if all the seats are filled. Call this toll free number before you dig a hole and trigger a regional blackout. Driver does not carry cash, so loan him a quarter if he runs out of gas. Objects in mirror are closer than they appear, and have big teeth, too. Do not fend, mold, bindle or sputilate. No transfers issued if the server on the other end is busy. Package sold by weight, not by wait. Your mileage may vary if you drive to different places. If any part of this agreement is held to be unenforceable, we'll keep printing it, anyway, since you probably won't find out. Conflicts may have settled during strike. Void where prohibited, taxed, or when your bladder is full. If you do not accept the terms of this agreement, you've just wasted several minutes.

[Carl-E]

Do not use while operating heavy machinery. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------


One of my favorite disclaimers, off a bottle of meds they gave my daughter at the height of her nerological mysteries; 

"May cause death." 

She stopped taking that one. 

[Border Reiver]

Do not operate motor vehicles while using.

My bet is that he's got either no porn, or photos of Dora - that she doesn't remember posing for.....

[iduguphergrave]

photos of Dora - that she doesn't remember posing for.....

...shaving.

[Akima]

"Do not expose your LaserWriter to open fire or flame." <–– Possibly the stupidest user-manual warning ever. Though the warning on the propane regulator of my outdoor wok-ring: "Never search for a leak with a naked flame" comes in second.  

[AnAverageWriter]

Akima-
As someone who's worked with lawyers, I have discovered one simple truth-

Never underestimate the stupidity which people are capable of, nor the predatory capacity of those who would use them for financial gain.

The disclaimers are there because without them, someone WOULD eventually set a LaserWriter on fire... and sue.

[Carl-E]

photos of Dora - that she doesn't remember posing for.....

...shaving.

shaving?

[Is it cold in here?]

Marten may not have saved any of it, but in 112 Pintsize claimed to have downloaded a lot on Marten's behalf.

[iduguphergrave]

shaving?


I....I was just joking, I really didn't know that website existed. That uh...that's seriously kinda hot 

[jwhouk]

Marten may not have saved any of it, but in 112 Pintsize claimed to have downloaded a lot on Marten's behalf.

Hmm... it may have been that Pintsize did it "for" Marten, but Marten didn't ask him to do it.

[akronnick]

shaving?


I....I was just joking, I really didn't know that website existed. That uh...that's seriously kinda hot 

Rule 34, iduguphergrave, rule 34.


There are NO exceptions!

[Kugai]

No swimming for 24 hours after.

[jwhouk]

"...regular, normal smut".

Okay, I'm going to open (Pan)Dora's box on this:

What exactly would that entail?

EDIT: I also don't quite like the title of the strip... 

[IlGreven]

Well, here comes crazy-bitch versus pushover fight.

[Kugai]

Yaknow . . . .


. . . . Marten has a very valid point.

[Akima]

Well, here comes crazy-bitch versus pushover fight.

Well, it should make the anger-fans happy, anyway.

[jwhouk]

Cue "Dora is a Bitch" posts in three, two...

[mickcheese]

"...regular, normal smut".

Okay, I'm going to open (Pan)Dora's box on this:

What exactly would that entail?

That a serious question?

Cause I could answer. I consider myself something of an expert in that field.

[ChibiSoma]

Dora is a bitch!

I got here as quickly as I could! I hope I'm not too late!

(This is my superpower. It kind of sucks.)

[redragon5000]

Wow...Marten has porn that Pintsize doesn't.  

[Shadic]

Cue "Dora is a Bitch" posts in three, two...

They'd have a point, you know. Just because you can predict a reaction before it happens doesn't make the reaction any less valid.

Dora needs to stop thinking that everybody is like she is. The same limits, the knowledge of those limits so that they don't accidentally hit her less rational ones, etc.

[Steve the Pocket]

Am I the only one who is totally lost as to why Marten doesn't want his committed girlfriend, whom he has already had sex with countless times, from seeing his porn collection? Hell, from the way they were talking on Friday, I was afraid she was going to pull it up with Faye right there. That would have been over the line.

For that matter, are we assuming this is the first time this porn has seen the light of day in quite some time? Because, to my mind, it's kinda bad form to date a real person and keep seeing Rosie Palms on the side (exeptions made for touching yourself to porn of your significant other, or memories of them, or whatever). But I'm really the wrong person to ask about such things. Maybe y'all can clue me in on how things work these days and make me a less-wrong person.

[JackFaerie]

WHOA, Dora. That... is so not ok. Snooping on a partner's computer is generally not ok, but when said partner has expressly said he was not comfortable with sharing that and considered it private, to just go and wholly and immediately disregard that? WHOA.

[ChibiSoma]

Like he said, it was about privacy more than anything.

Plus, you gotta figure, Marty's still got some of that simpering-fury leftover from the last time Dora was a bitch. At least this time he gave her a direct statement before taking his ball and going home. Quite a feat since he's already home. Why ain't this kid making his asshole girlfriend get the hell out when she pulls this shit? Why's he always the one leaving? He hasn't DONE anything. He NEVER does anything.

[jwhouk]

"...regular, normal smut".

Okay, I'm going to open (Pan)Dora's box on this:

What exactly would that entail?

That a serious question?

Cause I could answer. I consider myself something of an expert in that field.

Actually - yeah, it is a question. I mean, unless it's like a bunch of Maxim photoshoots, it's probably nothing like what's out there on the net...

[jwhouk]

Like he said, it was about privacy more than anything.

Plus, you gotta figure, Marty's still got some of that simpering-fury leftover from the last time Dora was a bitch. At least this time he gave her a direct statement before taking his ball and going home. Quite a feat since he's already home. Why ain't this kid making his asshole girlfriend get the hell out when she pulls this shit? Why's he always the one leaving? He hasn't DONE anything. He NEVER does anything.

Uh... he didn't leave. He went into the bedroom. Take a look at the door behind them in the half-frame before the SLAM!.

[LeeC]

WHOA, Dora. That... is so not ok. Snooping on a partner's computer is generally not ok, but when said partner has expressly said he was not comfortable with sharing that and considered it private, to just go and wholly and immediately disregard that? WHOA.

totally agree here.  Marten is in the right IMHO.  I would act the same way, granted my girlfriend is aware of the porn I like.  But if its something he doesnt want to talk about or for her to know out of embarrassment or because he likes to keep it private, she should not be going out of her way and doing it anyways.

Dora has flipped out at him over lesser things, but I know if the roles were reversed and say Marten did something Dora explicitly asked him not to she would be just as, if not more so angry.

@Steve the Pocket: its not the fact that she now knows what kind of porn he likes, but the fact he wanted to keep it private, and she kind of broke their trust by doing it anyways.

[JackFaerie]

Am I the only one who is totally lost as to why Marten doesn't want his committed girlfriend, whom he has already had sex with countless times, from seeing his porn collection? Hell, from the way they were talking on Friday, I was afraid she was going to pull it up with Faye right there. That would have been over the line.

For that matter, are we assuming this is the first time this porn has seen the light of day in quite some time? Because, to my mind, it's kinda bad form to date a real person and keep seeing Rosie Palms on the side (exeptions made for touching yourself to porn of your significant other, or memories of them, or whatever). But I'm really the wrong person to ask about such things. Maybe y'all can clue me in on how things work these days and make me a less-wrong person.

That's.... not how it works for most people I know at all. Being in a relationship has no effect on porn-watching... everyone I know still watches porn whether or not they are dating someone. I don't see what the problem is: if I'm dating someone I don't seem them 24/7 anyway, and it's only an issue if they're watching porn when I am right there and they're actively ignoring me in favor of it.

And for many people I know porn is something very personal, as well. It has to do with your most intimate fantasies--and sometimes fantasies that are very different from what you want to have in your actual sexlife, which may be hard for other people to understand. Having sex with someone, once or multiple times, doesn't mean you are comfortable sharing THAT information about you... because you'd have to not just utterly trust them, but also trust them not to ever mock or belittle or in any way scoff at your preferences, and the thing is, that's often the go-to reaction of people seeing someone else's porn.

[Boomslang]

Holy cow, I was actually right, it WAS a test on Martin's part.

I get the impression that Martin is looking for a truly one-sided event to drive home to Dora that she needs to respect him more. All the stuff previously in their relationship struggles, Martin's been at fault to some degree AND there's been mitigating circumstances. This is different- the line was drawn, Dora crossed it, and nothing made her do it. Prediction: Martin backs down at the last moment from a complete ultimatum, but he'll probably make Dora shed tears first, and then he'll discuss stuff. If she'll let him.

Healthy? Nope, but I never claimed it was.

I don't think it's likely they'll break up. But the possibility is more real now than ever. Let's face it, if Martin's the one slamming doors, the only one left to put stuff back together is Hanners. And Dora might not trust her completely with the Svenanigans.

[akronnick]

Uh... he didn't leave. He went into the bedroom. Take a look at the door behind them in the half-frame before the SLAM!.

He left the room.

So it's gonna be a hot time in the Ol' 'Serious Pony Discussion Forum' this week, I hope everyone sharpened their dick-brooms (or whatever one does to a UBMEOD to make it slightly less (or more, if that's how you swing) useless )

And for the record, Marten has a right to be mad here. His SO went ahead and did something that he specifically asked her not to do.

But...

I don't think anybody needs to dump anybody right now.

[1950's educational film]
You see kids, when two grown-ups are in a relationship that's even half-way serious, they, from time to time, do things that piss the other one off.
Then they fight. As they fight, they get to know each other better. Sometimes they find things out about each other that they just can't live with, like the other one is a communist or is secretly a mafia informant or enjoys giving anonymous blow jobs to strangers hiding in the bushes of the down-town park every Thursday night. But most of the time, it's stupid shit like stop forgetting to put the toothpaste cap back on or forgetting to put the toilet lid down or leaving her bras hanging from the shower curtain.

When that happens they yell at each other for a time and then they get over it.

And then they get to have make-up sex...
 [/1950's educational film] that's quite enough of that...

I don't think this is a hanging offense, as it were. He's gonna be mad, she's gonna say she's sorry, and then they'll talk about why what she did bothers him.

And then there will be cookies...

It's what the grown-ups do.

[ChibiSoma]

I think you guys give the big milksop way too much credit. This isn't a "THE LINE MUST BE DRAWN HEAH!" moment. It's a "God dammit she did it. I'm gonna go out, meet someone I know on the street or in a pub, bitch to them, then come home and be COMPLETELY AND UNREALISTICALLY REASONABLE with my bitchy girlfriend." moment.

Marten is the ur-sub. He will never have a real moment of coming out on top. He'll back down, he'll burn his anger out against someone with little to no relation to the problem at hand, or he'll just go get drunk and have adventures with a hobo for the rest of the night. Somehow, he'll end up apologizing. It is Marten. That is what he does.

[LeeC]

I wouldnt mind seeing him going to the bar again and talking with Jimbo

[Is it cold in here?]

Is this the first time Marten has set a boundary? Has he ever said in advance that he didn't want someone doing something?

[AnAverageWriter]

Hey, look at that!

The guy actually went and stood up for himself.

Way to go, Marten!

Now keep yourself strong. You're in the right here.

[mickcheese]

Actually - yeah, it is a question. I mean, unless it's like a bunch of Maxim photoshoots, it's probably nothing like what's out there on the net...

Ok, wasn't actually expecting a yes, but what the hell.

Your average whitebread porn usually goes something like: open with fellatio, move to cunnilingus, follow that with a few positions on the nearby furniture that are awkward in real life but give the camera a good shot of "the action", at some point in every porn reverse cowgirl shows up, and end with the money shot. Probably some anal and threesomes in his collection since those would hardly qualify as abnormal in the pron industry.

[AngelofShadows]

I think....I think I'm gonna go and throw my hat into the "Dora is being a child" ring. Which isn't the same as the "Dora is being a bitch" I've always considered that to at least contain some sort of malice intent in the "bitchy" actions, and this doesn't. Marten told her he didn't want her to look and she did, and then wondered why he got mad about it. It doesn't help that she rushed from her job to do it. That.....huh...

Really.....what kinda sensible person would leave their job to go see what porn their S.O. has on their computer? Like, I could kind of understand if there was reason to believe that it really was some sort of torture porn, but the fact that she doesn't, and admits to it, but still does it anyway, while telling him so seems.....I don't know....like she thinks that there are no consequences to what she does. Which is what my first ex used to do. Because she knew thought that I would forgive and not leave her because she was her.

Which, based squarely on me putting to much thought into this, makes me wonder; Where her past relationships with guys who were assholes, or guys who turned into assholes. Which, if you think about it, would sort of fit in to that whole sibling rivalry issue she has. "If Sven can treat people that way and get away with it, why can't I?" Which would feed said issue when it always backfires on her.

I don't know. I probably put to much thought into this....so to completely ruin any sort of logical statements I may have just made, I'm gonna go ahead and use that Psyduck emote. Cause fuck it, it's awesome.

 

[Y]

Or Dora found the decoy folder

[LeeC]

Or Dora found the decoy folder

YES! 

[Olymander]

It might just be me, but I found Dora's facial expressions just a bit off for this first strip.  It seems like she's sort of angry or annoyed for the entire thing, which sort of fits, but it almost seems more like she went in already upset.  As in, she started off grumpy and grouchy and was just looking for an excuse for a fight.

[akronnick]

Or Dora found the decoy folder

This.

The real stuff is hidden in a folder labelled 'tax records 2004-2006'

[snubnose]

Whats the point of this poll ? ???

The comic already says he only got "regular whatever".

[akronnick]

I would imagine that now that the comic is out, the poll will be changed.

[Delator]

Prediction: This fight spirals into a break-up.

Dora utilizes the time to iron out sibling issues with Sven...their parallel relationship issues enabling them to work around previous obstacles, they both become better people in the long run.

Marten and Hanners rescue Amir from a raging Allosaurus and transform Deathmole into a commecial and popular success at at least the regional level.

[Y]

Why are people still voting on it?

So what WILL we find out about Marten's Porn Stash?
Fat-bottomed Southern girls    4 (9.1%)
Skinny Goth Chicks    2 (4.5%)
Indie girls    5 (11.4%)
Red-headed Country Music singers    4 (9.1%)
Scatalogical Anime    0 (0%)
Anthro-PC Snuff    0 (0%)
Whatever it is, Pintsize is scared of it    10 (22.7%)
HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY.    10 (22.7%)
Okay, it's weak stuff, but it's HIS, DANGIT!    9 (20.5%)

the last one was 4 votes before,come to think about it the 2nd last had less votes too

[snubnose]

Holy cow, I was actually right, it WAS a test on Martin's part.

Except you're wrong, it was no test.

He told her he didnt want to, and she openly went for it, so it raised his fears and he had to check.

At no point did he want to test Dora.

I don't think it's likely they'll break up.

Uh. I think thats not so un-likely now.

Really.....what kinda sensible person would leave their job to go see what porn their S.O. has on their computer?

The person who are their own boss, obviously.



@Y: I voted "he doesnt have any" because thats what I would have answered if I hadnt already known todays strip.

[akronnick]

Or Dora found the decoy folder

This.

The real stuff is hidden in a folder labelled 'tax records 2004-2006'

Oh shit!
*runs off to rename porn folder*

[fifthfiend]

It's time for Marten And Dora Have An Argument

And Dora Says Something Thoughtless Or Hypocritical

And Then They Stomp Off To Talk To Other People

And Then They Agree That Dora Needs To Work On Being A Little Less Crazy

And Then They Say The Words "IN your UNNNNN DER WEAAAAAAAAR" Roughly Seventy Billion Times

[AngelofShadows]

Really.....what kinda sensible person would leave their job to go see what porn their S.O. has on their computer?

The person who are their own boss, obviously.

Just because she's capable of leaving whenever she wishes doesn't mean she should. More so, seeing as she is a "Boss" she has quite a bit of responsibilities to not only her employees, but also to her customers, to run a business, not show up and leave just to look at a laptop which she could've done when she got done with her shift.

But Dora is not all to blame for this. Faye is at fault as well. I don't think she's reminded Dora of the potential consequences of her actions http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=459


edit: Well....that could've gone better....

[Exar_Kun]

Yeah, I'm going to jump into the "Dora was just looking to start something" side of the ring here. You could basically tell thats what was happening by her facial expressions through the entire strip.

[Boomslang]

Except you're wrong, it was no test.

He told her he didnt want to, and she openly went for it, so it raised his fears and he had to check.

At no point did he want to test Dora.

Well, telling me I'm wrong is one of the great tactics of debate, I suppose, but I'll respectfully disagree. I specifically disagree with your characterization of Martin's actions, there is no 'raising of fears' because he knew precisely what was going to happen as soon as she left after that discussion. By following her, he clearly was expecting to catch her in the act. What other possibility would you suggest?

When I say he was testing her, I will point out that he could have avoided all of this by saying it was perfectly vanilla, which it is, and which would have resulted in Dora ceasing to ask questions. Just before this, he was willing to talk about intensely personal, highly sexual subjects with no hangups whatsoever. Blithely dodging the question would have been perfectly fitting with everything we've seen of Martin's character- it's this latest business that is the aberration, and thus I suspect that it is artificial on Martin's part. I will not claim this process is necessarily conscious, though.