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Author Topic: YEVOD DIVAD!  (Read 2892 times)

Dliessmgg

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YEVOD DIVAD!
« on: 07 Dec 2010, 12:35 »

There was once a lonely German rabbi (he lived in his mom's basement) who was worried because the kids didn't like the Talmud anymore. So he prayed to the oh Lord :police::

"Oh Lord :police:! In my long life
I have seen hundreds of hands
and fingers and faces.
Where are they now?
Where are they when I need them?
Please send me an answer, oh Lord :police:!"


And then the Satan :evil: appeared! And his :evil: thundering voice droned: "Yo mang! wassup. I herd you have-hadiddly-have yourself some probs. Drink a delightful tea any day and whoosh! away with that."

The rabbi thankfully replied: "Thank you, oh Lord :evil:!"

So the rabbi drank a metric shitton of tea after the Satan :evil: disappeared and then another imperial fuckton. Thus spoke the rabbi: "I shall make this new wrap music with texts from the Talmud now! And I shall record it on a cassette! That would be super fancy!" So he recorded his wrap music on a cassette and sold it to little kids. Obligatory random Calvin and Hobbes reference. The police :police: didn't like that and put him into prison. There he had surprise buttsecks and normal buttsecks and funny buttsecks and reverse buttsecks and many other sorts of buttsecks many times again and again. It was very tragic.

But on the day when he was released he said "FUCK THE POLICE :police:!" and the Satan :evil: appeared again. The Satan :evil: thrusted words out of his mouth: "Hello, my little rabbi. I see you had fun in prison. Now you're ready to possess the Power Of Rawk'n'Rawl!"

So he took him onto a journey through hell and they drank a lot and smoked a lot and fucked a lot and had a lot of fun all the time every day and every night.

At the end, there were three guys:

Rodrigo "Firefucker" Dosantos, Tamer of the Axe
Poladski "Polefty" Polodski, Thunder of the Cords
Martin "Whorebanger" Maxissimo, Handler of the Sticks
Mr. Squeak, oboe

Together with them the rabbi formed the band Yevod Divad! and they had much fun and it was very metal and very trve and they got very famous and stuff. Und wenn sie nicht gestorben sind, dann ficken sie noch heute. :psyduck:
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Quote from: KharBevNor
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valley_parade

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #1 on: 07 Dec 2010, 12:44 »

I read this as "Vlade Divac".
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Wait so you're letting something that happened 10 years ago ruin your quality of life? What are you, America? :psyduck:

squawk

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #2 on: 07 Dec 2010, 12:47 »

Vlade! The big yugoslavian guy who was on the kings and then randomly went to the lakers before disappearing and being completely irrelevant!

I kinda miss that Sac lineup, with all the eastern european dudes. Stojakovic was such a choker, though. Shame that game 6 2002 WCF against the Lakers was rigged and got stolen from them.
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David_Dovey

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #3 on: 07 Dec 2010, 12:57 »

no thank you
« Last Edit: 07 Dec 2010, 13:03 by David_Dovey »
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It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

tommydski

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #4 on: 07 Dec 2010, 13:00 »

Hey, I liked it!

 :mrgreen:
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valley_parade

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #5 on: 07 Dec 2010, 13:19 »

Vlade! The big yugoslavian guy who was on the kings and then randomly went to the lakers before disappearing and being completely irrelevant!

There was a documentary on ESPN a few months ago about his friendship with Drazen Petrovic and the war that broke up Yugoslavia in the early 90s. I think it's called "Once Brothers" or something. Was a good watch.

And it wasn't that random. He started his NBA career with the Lakers.
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Wait so you're letting something that happened 10 years ago ruin your quality of life? What are you, America? :psyduck:

squawk

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #6 on: 07 Dec 2010, 13:48 »

Oh I didn't know that. I was still really young when he was around. And he's not irrelevant! That was kind of a mean word. He's just from the past now
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valley_parade

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #7 on: 07 Dec 2010, 13:49 »

Vlade Divac will always be relevant to me.

Because Vlade is a cool name.
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Wait so you're letting something that happened 10 years ago ruin your quality of life? What are you, America? :psyduck:

squawk

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #8 on: 07 Dec 2010, 13:52 »

definitely better than Peja and Hedo!
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tommydski

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #9 on: 07 Dec 2010, 13:54 »

I wish he could have worked in something about how Dovey sedud swolb.
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Quote from: Ozymandias
One minute we're playing Mario Kart, the next my penis is in your mouth - it just happens.

valley_parade

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #10 on: 07 Dec 2010, 13:57 »

He is quite the rewolb edud.
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Wait so you're letting something that happened 10 years ago ruin your quality of life? What are you, America? :psyduck:

Barmymoo

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #11 on: 07 Dec 2010, 15:09 »

?won thgir ralusni erom eb syug uoy dluoC
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There's this really handy "other thing" I'm going to write as a footnote to my abstract that I can probably explore these issues in. I think I'll call it my "dissertation."

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #12 on: 07 Dec 2010, 15:43 »

Look at that guy, all sdrawkcab sedud gniwolb. That's some gniwolb drah!
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David_Dovey

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #13 on: 07 Dec 2010, 16:01 »

sʞɔnɟ noʎ ʎuunɟ ʇ,uıɐ ʇıɥs ʇɐɥʇ 'ʇı ʇınb ʎǝɥ
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It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

jhocking

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #14 on: 07 Dec 2010, 21:21 »

how are you guys doing that

 :?

David_Dovey

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #15 on: 07 Dec 2010, 21:28 »

ɔıƃɐɯ
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It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

imagist42

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #16 on: 07 Dec 2010, 21:30 »

god damn it
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Hopefully it goes without saying but you should always ask before sticking things in people's butts

Johnny C

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #17 on: 07 Dec 2010, 21:47 »

i dont get the op at all
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[02:12] yuniorpocalypse: let's talk about girls
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Ballard

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #18 on: 07 Dec 2010, 23:57 »

seconded
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I'm like the boy who cried "you guys are faggots"

Lummer

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #19 on: 08 Dec 2010, 00:27 »

 :psyduck:
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McTaggart

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #20 on: 08 Dec 2010, 00:35 »

Please keep meebo in meebo.
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One day ends and another begins and we're never none the wiser.

Spluff

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #21 on: 08 Dec 2010, 02:30 »

has jussi become contagious?
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[16:27] Ozy:  has joined the room
[16:27] Quietus: porn necklace!
[16:27] Quietus: Shove it up yer vag!
[16:27] Ozy: has left the room

KharBevNor

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #22 on: 08 Dec 2010, 08:13 »

Please keep meebo in meebo.

Please keep your opinions in your opinion-hole.
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[22:25] Dovey: i don't get sigquoted much
[22:26] Dovey: like, maybe, 4 or 5 times that i know of?
[22:26] Dovey: and at least one of those was a blatant ploy at getting sigquoted

http://panzerdivisio

Dliessmgg

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #23 on: 08 Dec 2010, 16:15 »

Please keep your opinions in your opinion-hole.

I guess it's time to lose my sigquote virginity.
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Cernunnos

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #24 on: 08 Dec 2010, 19:53 »

i want to read the thread title as DAVID YOW

who happens to be in some bands or so i hear
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David_Dovey

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #25 on: 09 Dec 2010, 08:38 »

OK, this thread is now about DAVID YOW

Did you know DAVID YOW is actually a pretty accomplished commercial graphic designer? Here is some of his retouching work
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It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

Cernunnos

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Re: YEVOD DIVAD!
« Reply #26 on: 09 Dec 2010, 10:47 »

He has done some acting too!

he also sometimes gets hit in the head
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