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Two people making out.

5 (7.6%)

Kids playing video games.

3 (4.5%)

...and NOT on the library computers.

7 (10.6%)

Someone using the bathroom sink as a sponge bath.

5 (7.6%)

Horrid abuse of the Victorian Porn Collection.

1 (1.5%)

The entire collection of MAD Magazine, from issue 1.

5 (7.6%)

A robot. Seriously. And it WASN'T Pintsize. (Thankfully)

2 (3%)

Police arresting someone for not paying their fines.

0 (0%)

Someone eating between the stacks.

6 (9.1%)

Someone smoking/drinking/dropping acid in the stacks.

4 (6.1%)

Someone re-enacting the Death Star trench scene with desk chairs and paper hats.

8 (12.1%)

COMPILING....

20 (30.3%)

Total Members Voted: 64

[Soulsynger]

I never have dreams like that.

Apparently to have such a dream you'd have to go without sex for an extended period of time. Probably weeks at least, maybe months. And I'm guessing you're not supposed to jerk off either. But that's an experiment I'm unwilling to undertake, so I couldn't tell you for sure.

[ ... ]
Unless, of course, as you said, self-stimulation fights it off.  Then my genitals would be so pacifist they'd make the Dalai Lama seem like a boozed-up soccer hooligan.

We are SO FAR down right now the Japanese are going "NANI!?" at the sight of some forum posters' feet sticking out of the ground.

[sitnspin]

I completely sympathise, Dora.  I went without sex for a month and a half once. My gf/fiance at the time had this crazy idea to refrain after we got engaged until the wedding. It got bad when I didn't even have to be asleep for things like this to happen. Luckily she came to her senses and ceased that little experiment.  I have made it a point to never neglect my vulva again.


My vulva and i have something of a co-dependent relationship.

[MillionDollar Belt Sander]

I never have dreams like that.

Apparently to have such a dream you'd have to go without sex for an extended period of time. Probably weeks at least, maybe months. And I'm guessing you're not supposed to jerk off either. But that's an experiment I'm unwilling to undertake, so I couldn't tell you for sure.

[ ... ]
Unless, of course, as you said, self-stimulation fights it off.  Then my genitals would be so pacifist they'd make the Dalai Lama seem like a boozed-up soccer hooligan.

We are SO FAR down right now the Japanese are going "NANI!?" at the sight of some forum posters' feet sticking out of the ground.

Cricket-bat-armed vulvas singing classic rock in proper British accents...  Or soccer-hooligan-themed dicks drinking at the pub...   that's MILD compared to what the Japanese come up with.     

I mean... all I have to say is "tentacles" and leave it at that.

[de_la_Nae]

Hold on now, most of the time the tentacles don't wear trucker hats and lounge about a bar, waiting with their hockey sticks at hand for a passing victim.

Most of the time.

[sitnspin]

I've seen some interesting vulvas in my time, even British ones, but none that swung cricket bats or sang. Some of them were vocal, but I don;t know that I would call it "speaking".

[MillionDollar Belt Sander]

Hold on now, most of the time the tentacles don't wear trucker hats and lounge about a bar, waiting with their hockey sticks at hand for a passing victim.

Most of the time.

You've never accidentally walked into a lesbian-bar on Bull-Dyke Thursday by mistake have you?    

[de_la_Nae]

Accidentally? By Mistake?

Hm...no, pretty certain never by mistake. 

[raoullefere]

God. Apparently couple portmanteaus are to me what sexy things are to Dora; I somehow sensed this post and homed in on the exact damn page to find it, too. All that just to say: Bleah! Hate 'em!

Just another of my many useless 'talents.'

Edit: another thought: if Marten does work out and really bulks up, will he still be able mope as effectively if his arms can no longer dangle, spindle-like, at his sides?



Yeah, I agree: I'd better stick to the anti-couple portmanteau-crusade.

Hey, if you need intimate contact in your relationships, that's cool - but to say that that's a prerequisite for all relationships is just ignorant.

However, in the specific context of shipping, do you ever see non-sexual pairings?  Really?

That's what makes them creepy.   

That and the names....    Mannerlor?   Han-Tai?    Farten?

[westrim]

I completely sympathize, Dora. I went without sex for a month and a half once.

Seeing people complaining about this like a major, cocaine withdrawal level distraction always perplexes me, since I've gone 24 years without sex and I'm doing fine so far.

[Is it cold in here?]

Welcome back!

Marten can still slouch and stare at the ceiling, and brood. Those skills cover most of what's needed for moping.

[Akima]

if Marten does work out and really bulks up, will he still be able mope as effectively if his arms can no longer dangle, spindle-like, at his sides?

He could take lessons from Elliot.

Welcome back, Raoul!

[Majicou83]

How does a vulva even hold a baseball bat?  Let alone swing one...

[Pilchard123]

This is why.

[Majicou83]

Pleh. I was hoping for a pun about how it became armed.

[Method of Madness]

I completely sympathize, Dora. I went without sex for a month and a half once.

Seeing people complaining about this like a major, cocaine withdrawal level distraction always perplexes me, since I've gone 24 years without sex and I'm doing fine so far.

While part of me agrees with you, part of me wants to point out that you've probably also gone 24 years without cocaine and you're probably doing fine with that, too.

[crazdgamer]

Comic 2369, panel 1...

... what's happening in the window there?  What kind of store is that? What are they selling?  Why does it look like there's some Shakespearean production happening on the other side of the glass that we're not privy to?

I've been staring at it for 5 minutes.  Dora's vulva is clearly not the main focus of the comic. 

(... that's a weird sentence right there.)

[K1dmor]

Comic 2369, panel 1...

... what's happening in the window there?  What kind of store is that?

They're coming out of the Gym 

[Near Lurker]

Pleh. I was hoping for a pun about how it became armed.

Bat in, down the snatch?

[Majicou83]

Pleh. I was hoping for a pun about how it became armed.

Bat in, down the snatch?

Are you saying its been so long, now there are bats?

Also.. the window shapes are disturbing me now. I'm thinking Yoga. Or a Bandicoot.

[crazdgamer]

Comic 2369, panel 1...

... what's happening in the window there?  What kind of store is that?

They're coming out of the Gym 

I'm... not quite sure.  It's certainly possible, but they never actually said where they were going.

[Is it cold in here?]

Are you saying its been so long, now there are bats?

Good callback.

[riccostar]

I gotta say I often feel like my reproductive organs are completely autonomous.  If they ever get separated from me (please let that never happen) I half believe they could get up and walk away and lead a very sexual life.

Wow that was a strange post 

[sitnspin]

I completely sympathize, Dora. I went without sex for a month and a half once.

Seeing people complaining about this like a major, cocaine withdrawal level distraction always perplexes me, since I've gone 24 years without sex and I'm doing fine so far.

Seeing people say things like this always perplexes me, as I can not even fathom going that long without sex. I've gone through cocaine withdrawal, and I will take that over lack of sex any day.

Different people are different.

Is it possible there is a hump you can get over (no pun intended) where if you go past a certain amount of time without it the cravings cease, sort of like cigarettes?  Entirely possible, but I have never seen the point of trying.

[Kugai]

...............

[K1dmor]

Comic 2369, panel 1...

... what's happening in the window there?  What kind of store is that?

They're coming out of the Gym 

I'm... not quite sure.  It's certainly possible, but they never actually said where they were going.

 But they're going to the gym since 996 - 1000.
 And they went again the day after. So, i guess they're kind of members right now.

[Method of Madness]

I completely sympathize, Dora. I went without sex for a month and a half once.

Seeing people complaining about this like a major, cocaine withdrawal level distraction always perplexes me, since I've gone 24 years without sex and I'm doing fine so far.

Seeing people say things like this always perplexes me, as I can not even fathom going that long without sex. I've gone through cocaine withdrawal, and I will take that over lack of sex any day.

Different people are different.

Is it possible there is a hump you can get over (no pun intended) where if you go past a certain amount of time without it the cravings cease, sort of like cigarettes?  Entirely possible, but I have never seen the point of trying.

I'm fairly certain that the 24 years is Westrim's entire life. That's not to say people who have never had sex don't want to (cough), but you can't exactly go through withdrawal from lack of something if it's something that you've never done.

[MillionDollar Belt Sander]

I go long stretches between partners.   It's not something I've ever craved or gone through withdrawal over though.      Guess it's just not the dominant driving force in my life like it is for some people.

[westrim]

Seeing people complaining about this like a major, cocaine withdrawal level distraction always perplexes me, since I've gone 24 years without sex and I'm doing fine so far.

While part of me agrees with you, part of me wants to point out that you've probably also gone 24 years without cocaine and you're probably doing fine with that, too.

It wasn't a direct comparison, it was an analogy. Substitute caffeine or nicotine. Or for non drugs, and things I actually have gone at least a year without after doing so regularly, seeing a movie, watching tv, using a computer, playing video games, and eating chocolate. I also went without masturbating for three months and got by without major hankerings. Stuff that pleases me, pleases me. Not doing one thing means I'm likely doing something else that pleases me, or too busy to worry about it. Whenever I do get around to copulation, I intend for it to be more about pleasing my partner than scratching my own itch, since if I wanted to please myself I have a hand. Or maybe I'm just a naive virgin and everyone can go about their business.

I'm fairly certain that the 24 years is Westrim's entire life. That's not to say people who have never had sex don't want to (cough), but you can't exactly go through withdrawal from lack of something if it's something that you've never done.

This is a fact. I have filled out my forum profile a bit, though it's a few months behind.

EDIT: And now I've upgraded to Beyonce. Not sure how I feel about that.

[Method of Madness]

I wasn't criticizing, I was just saying it's easier to do without something you've never had. And yeah, people are different, some people need some things more than others. That thing is sometimes sex. (shrug)

[westrim]

Seeing people say things like this always perplexes me, as I can not even fathom going that long without sex. I've gone through cocaine withdrawal, and I will take that over lack of sex any day.

Different times between strokes for different folks?

...............

Congratulations on being love childless.

I wasn't criticizing, I was just saying it's easier to do without something you've never had. And yeah, people are different, some people need some things more than others. That thing is sometimes sex. (shrug)

I didn't read it as criticism, insert comment about the difficulty of ascertaining tone from text.

[Overkillengine]

Withdrawal (to me) is better than putting up with someone not worth the hassle just to get laid; or worse yet, since no (non surgical) birth control method by itself that I know of is 100% effective....having a child with someone that would be a bad choice as a long term partner/parent.

Or I could just be too picky for how ugly I am.

That being said, getting used to having an activity so pleasant readily available then going without it does tend to place on the lower end of the suck spectrum.


Edit: also, diseases. Far simpler just to err on side of caution.

[Soulsynger]

I've gone without sex for about 5 or 6 months now after only getting it every three weeks or so on the weekend for about 3 years.
I find myself falling between the cracks here again as I'm not quite certain whether I'm doing well or not. (It's missed, but has never been a big driving force in my life.)
Or in the words of JD from Scrubs when asked whether he was sexually active at the moment: "Oh, it's active."

[ ... ]
EDIT: And now I've upgraded to Beyonce. Not sure how I feel about that.

I feel you, BROyonce.

[Bluesummers]

Oh Claire, you assumer, you.

...Poor Marten. *Takes a drink*

EDIT: And now I've upgraded to Beyonce. Not sure how I feel about that.

I feel you, BROyonce.

♫ If ya post it then ya shoulda put a ring on it ♫

[K1dmor]

 At least Claire have some moral values...i guess?

 Also, does Dora's nightmare count as a wet dream? 

[Sidhekin]

While I still find Claire obnoxious (and still don't know why I find her worse than the other obnoxious characters), I find this particular instance of obnoxiousness almost endearing.

* Sidhekin is confused.

[St.Clair]

She's being obnoxious in (what she thinks is) defense of a friend.

[Overkillengine]

....with Marten's luck, he's better off just not ever saying anything.

[Soulsynger]

I also don't think it's a good idea to shred the dean's forms in half because of some jump'd shark conclusion... Oo

[ ... ]
 Also, does Dora's nightmare count as a wet dream? 

No,  but it counts as a bat dream. Amirite, fellas!!?




... Fellas?

[cesariojpn]

I also don't think it's a good idea to shred the dean's forms in half because of some jump'd shark conclusion... Oo

[ ... ]
 Also, does Dora's nightmare count as a wet dream? 

No,  but it counts as a bat dream. Amirite, fellas!!?




... Fellas?

*sounds of footsteps echoing out into the distance*
*door slams*

[Tova]

While I still find Claire obnoxious (and still don't know why I find her worse than the other obnoxious characters), I find this particular instance of obnoxiousness almost endearing.

* Sidhekin is confused.

Cognitive dissonance? 

[Loki]

* Sidhekin is confused.

* It  hurt itself in it's confusion! 

Ahem. Sorry, I just had to go there.

I need a Nintendo 3DS by October. So excited.

[bhtooefr]

Also, is Claire jealous of Marten for having dated Dora, or Dora for having dated Marten?

[Lubricus]

....with Marten's luck, he's better off just not ever saying anything.

I think he's done well so far by not saying much - he comes off as quite suave, for once. Go Marten!

[WAYF]

No,  but it counts as a bat dream. Amirite, fellas!!?


... Fellas?

Don't make me break out the Pun Foul gifs again...

It's a good thing that Tai doesn't seem to feel guilt very easily, otherwise she might start wondering why all two of the interns who know about the history with her, Dora and Marten have reacted badly to it.
I wonder how much Momo knows...

[ZoeB]

I wish I'd known a girl like Emily when I was young and single.   

I knew a girl a lot like Claire... we've been married now for 32 years.
Despite me having transitioned in 2005.
Asexual relationships do miss something, but if they're good enough, that's not a dealbreaker.

[Soulsynger]

No,  but it counts as a bat dream. Amirite, fellas!!?
[ ... ]

Don't make me break out the Pun Foul gifs again...

[ ... ]

... awww. And I was sepcifically (and, might I add, expertly) fishing for one of those... damn daaang.

I wish I'd known a girl like Emily when I was young and single.   

I knew a girl a lot like Claire... we've been married now for 32 years.
Despite me having transitioned in 2005.
Asexual relationships do miss something, but if they're good enough, that's not a dealbreaker.

Wow. That is DEFINITELY something way up there on my "interesting stuff to make short comics about"-list. It's all I can do not to ask you for your adress and phone number.

[WAYF]

Oh alright.



You haven't made any OTHER terrible puns this week, have you?

[Loki]

Okay, I totally forgot to ask: Can anyone explain Claire's "Luckyyyy" comment to me?

[ImaTripp]

Wondering who Claire is calling lucky. For some reason I assume it's Marten. This would mean she's bi?

Worked in a library for 4 years. The weirdest thing I ever experienced was closing the serials department one night. Part of that entails walking to the bathrooms on our floor and telling people the library is closing in 5 minutes. If no one is in the bathroom, going in and looking for any books or magazines that might have been left in there. There were no male coworkers on my shift with me that night so I had to take care of both bathrooms. I opened the womens room and announced our closing. No one was in there. I knocked on the men's bathroom door, cracked it open and announced, "We are closing in five minutes!" From the bathroom bellowed an upset voice, "Five minutes!? NOoooooooooooo!!!"

Curious, I hid in the bound journal stacks next to the bathrooms to see who yelled. A 20-some YO student who looked like a human basketball with coke bottle glasses, greasy black hair, and acne deserving of a teenager waddled out. I watched carefully and he waddled down the stacks aisle to replace a bound journal from where he must have found it. After he left, I walked over to where he put the journal away to see what he had taken into the bathroom. It was Women's Health and Fitness.

[Loki]

What the.... also, welcome to the forum.