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Author Topic: Random Puns  (Read 223685 times)

hedgie

Re: Random Puns
« Reply #800 on: 20 Mar 2015, 12:35 »

Sorry, I'm having a bit of trouble hearing you.  Covered in LaTeX, after all.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #801 on: 20 Mar 2015, 12:39 »

Sorry, wasn't trying to printing PRESS you too hard, I just prefer bouncing puns off other people to double-posting
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #802 on: 20 Mar 2015, 14:25 »

Font puns are very much to my Palatino. They are the Futura of this thread.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #803 on: 20 Mar 2015, 14:30 »

Font puns are very much to my Palatino. They are the Futura of this thread.

Oh, shit, is it just font puns we're supposed to be doing? I thought it was printed word- based stuff in general. I came, I saw that, and I thought 'Gutenberg, we can totally do this!' but just font names? Not such a verdana pasture.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #804 on: 20 Mar 2015, 15:03 »

Helvetican think of some more puns
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #805 on: 20 Mar 2015, 15:06 »

Sorry, I'm having a bit of trouble hearing you.  Covered in LaTeX, after all.
TeXnology puns, eh? I excel at those, or my name isn't Bob!
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #806 on: 20 Mar 2015, 15:07 »

Helvetican think of some more puns

Oh sure we can. I mean, we've got a Century's worth of font types to choose from, and terms relating to fonts, it's not a problem! There's a font of information concerning these kinds of things!
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #807 on: 20 Mar 2015, 15:08 »

Sorry, I'm having a bit of trouble hearing you.  Covered in LaTeX, after all.
TeXnology puns, eh? I excel at those, or my name isn't Bob!

IS your name Bob? I don't know if you've said, and I'm a bit Ross-ty when it comes to searching through forums for information like that. Hope you understand
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #808 on: 20 Mar 2015, 15:10 »

I guess that that's a Signo the times
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #809 on: 20 Mar 2015, 18:05 »

*sighs*
This thread is full of Dingbats.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #810 on: 20 Mar 2015, 18:06 »

*sighs*
This thread is full of Dingbats.

WEBDINGbats???? :claireface:
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #811 on: 20 Mar 2015, 18:12 »

Actually, dingbats is the proper typographical term for graphics used in typesetting. Webdings is just a typeface of dingbats. You'd know that if you would read a Bookman.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #812 on: 20 Mar 2015, 18:38 »

Actually, dingbats is the proper typographical term for graphics used in typesetting. Webdings is just a typeface of dingbats. You'd know that if you would read a Bookman.

That is a boldface lie. I have read many a book that had nothing to say on the matter, you absolute rod!
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #813 on: 20 Mar 2015, 21:06 »

Things are getting a bit Cuckoo here.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #814 on: 21 Mar 2015, 01:31 »

Things are getting a bit Cuckoo here.

Well it's about time! Gears have been ticking that way for a while now!
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hedgie

Re: Random Puns
« Reply #815 on: 21 Mar 2015, 01:41 »

One of these days, though, the pendulum will be swinging the other way.
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Neko_Ali

Re: Random Puns
« Reply #816 on: 21 Mar 2015, 06:12 »

Just make sure you don't fall into a pit avoiding it. Or else you might be seen nevermore.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #817 on: 21 Mar 2015, 06:29 »

I love a good Poe m.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #818 on: 21 Mar 2015, 07:12 »

Certainly got me raven
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #819 on: 21 Mar 2015, 14:28 »

Got you Crowing too.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #820 on: 21 Mar 2015, 18:28 »

Got you Crowing too.

Ooh, watch out for the eagle-eye on this one, just swooping in for the kill outta nowhere!
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #821 on: 22 Mar 2015, 16:35 »

Keep this up and you'll have us in stitches
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #822 on: 22 Mar 2015, 16:48 »

Keep this up and you'll have us in stitches

Better than an open wound, amiright? :claireface:
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #823 on: 23 Mar 2015, 19:28 »

It looks like injury puns are a bit of a sore subject in this thread. I'm just trying to be a cut-up over here, not trying to drain this thread of life and vitality. I'm not Dracula.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #824 on: 23 Mar 2015, 20:00 »

I've said how much I dislike double-posting, but the die have been cast, and so it must be. Any way you dress it up, puns are too important to be forgotten. All day long, I've been in withdrawal.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #825 on: 23 Mar 2015, 21:07 »

You can bank on someone coming up with a pun to make the Thread pay off
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #826 on: 23 Mar 2015, 23:04 »

Since this is also for "Bad Jokes", I'll drop whatever I found on my other forum hangouts that isn't inappropriate to post. Emotes have been replaced with relevant equivalents. Sorry if any of these have been posted before, but pages here are really big and I should have been in bed three hours ago.

Quote from: Tonkka≤
What did i do when i wanted to see what gullible means? I looked it up!  :claireface:
Quote from: Quote Story
How did I escape Iraq?

I ran.
Quote from: Mega-Bear
Plateaus are the highest form of flattery.

Quote from: CargÝn
Why did the bartender push his wife off a cliff?


tequila
Quote from: kompressor
Every one of you has a little of me in your heart.

PS You should see a cardiologist about that.
Quote from: Bomb Kirby
Why are there no knock-knock jokes about freedom?

Because freedom rings.
Quote from: Pie Crust
An engineer, a physicist and a statistician are building a cannon to hit the target.

The engineer misses by 5m. The physicist misses by -5m. The statistician yells "BULLSEYE!".
Quote from: Pie Crust
Helium walks into a bar. The bartender tells him "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here". He doesn't react.
Quote from: Pie Crust
-I changed my iPodís name to Titanic. Itís syncing now.
-When chemists die, they barium.
-Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
-How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
-I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
-This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but Iíd never met herbivore.
-Iím reading a book about anti-gravity. I just canít put it down.
-I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
-They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
-PMS jokes arenít funny. Period.
-I posted 10 puns on an online forum hoping one would make the users laugh but no pun in-ten-did!
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #827 on: 24 Mar 2015, 07:25 »

Ah! An avalanche of bad jokes! Snow good!

Welvome, new person! Ice to meet you! You seem cool
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #828 on: 24 Mar 2015, 08:25 »

Chemistry puns, eh? That reminds me of the time I met a cute gallium in Californium. We played polonium until she hit her neon the ground. We went to the hospital, where the attending physician was named Cal. We waited for hours until the nurse came out and told everyone "Calcium now. He'll helium." We cesiumed the opportunity to see the doctor, and it turns out she was OK. The doctor was a boron guy, though. He droned on and on about ironing his shirt. I was going to drive her home, but it turns out cars weren't allowed in the town because of the carbon. At least the buses were cheap. They only cost a nickel. It all ended in tragedy, though, when the FBI launched a radon her house. It turns out she had been lead into a trap.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #829 on: 24 Mar 2015, 13:18 »

You're segue is stretching it. Careful not to overextend yourself, else you might pull a muscle
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #830 on: 24 Mar 2015, 15:53 »

He's just fission for compliments
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #831 on: 24 Mar 2015, 16:09 »

He's just fission for compliments

Well he's trying at least, getting atom, throwing a lot of jokes out and hoping not to bomb. Gotta respect that.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #832 on: 24 Mar 2015, 22:41 »

There is that, and he's not being a little boy about it.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #833 on: 25 Mar 2015, 01:21 »

Oooh, Kugai, be careful. That way lies mutually-assured destruction...
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #834 on: 25 Mar 2015, 12:29 »

There is that, and he's not being a little boy about it.
Are you calling me a fat man?
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #835 on: 25 Mar 2015, 12:41 »

There is that, and he's not being a little boy about it.
Are you calling me a fat man?
Either one would fit in a Bockscar, so I wouldn't necessarily take offense.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #836 on: 25 Mar 2015, 14:40 »

Loving this Tibbets
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #837 on: 25 Mar 2015, 15:44 »

Plane puns, physics puns and bomb puns... there's your Trinity.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #838 on: 25 Mar 2015, 15:57 »

So, wait. Which one's the Father?
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #839 on: 25 Mar 2015, 18:15 »

Ow,ow,ow, I was cutting a block of wood and it slipped, a Sawtooth caught my knuckle and now I'm bleeding.

*edit*
Dang it, I got my code names for nuclear bomb tests mixed up with names for fictional nuclear bomb tests (Sawtooth was from a book,  X-files: Ground Zero)

I feel about as Bright as an Anvil right now. :-P
« Last Edit: 25 Mar 2015, 19:24 by SubaruStephen »
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #840 on: 25 Mar 2015, 18:19 »

Ow,ow,ow, I was cutting a block of wood and it slipped, a Sawtooth caught my knuckle and now I'm bleeding.

I'm sure that's a sharp pun, but it's going straight over my head. Like, I'm sure it cuts right to the core, but I'm ignorant. I'd ask for an explanation, but unless you could work in a woodworking pun, I'd feel like you were off-topic
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #841 on: 26 Mar 2015, 20:57 »

there's your Trinity.
The Carrie, the Anne, and the Moss?
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #842 on: 26 Mar 2015, 21:21 »

there's your Trinity.
The Carrie, the Anne, and the Moss?

Introducing something neo! I like it! It seems unreal!
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #843 on: 26 Mar 2015, 21:33 »

Good thing Mick Jagger wasn't in that. They'd have gathered no Moss.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #844 on: 26 Mar 2015, 23:51 »

Introducing something neo! I like it! It seems unreal!
I'm always up to my tricks! <--- Works better in an Australian accent
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #845 on: 27 Mar 2015, 00:01 »

A bit CONventional
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #846 on: 27 Mar 2015, 05:25 »

A bit CONventional

Don't be such a prisoner to convention, I mean, we're free people here!
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #847 on: 28 Mar 2015, 02:28 »

Why did Aleister Crowley call himself a giant ground sloth?
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #848 on: 28 Mar 2015, 12:49 »

Beeeecause he wanted to stay out of the Trees??
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #849 on: 29 Mar 2015, 00:48 »

Because he was covered in fir?
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