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Author Topic: Random Puns  (Read 157186 times)

Blue Kitty

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1950 on: 08 Feb 2020, 11:29 »

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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1951 on: 08 Feb 2020, 16:10 »

pain staking would be driving a stake through the heart of a baguette also that so-called "pun" doesn't work at all when you read it out aloud nggghghhhhhhhh  :psyduck:
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cybersmurf

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1952 on: 10 Feb 2020, 14:44 »

pain staking would be driving a stake through the heart of a baguette also that so-called "pun" doesn't work at all when you read it out aloud nggghghhhhhhhh  :psyduck:

Go away, you with your inpainatrable logic!
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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1953 on: 10 Feb 2020, 23:05 »

nggghghhhhhhhh
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1954 on: 11 Feb 2020, 02:35 »

Is Roko pansexual?
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cybersmurf

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1955 on: 13 Feb 2020, 08:04 »

Is a melody that makes you fall asleep a naptune?
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Akima

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1956 on: 14 Feb 2020, 03:56 »

Why should justice be cold?
(click to show/hide)
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RedWolf4

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1957 on: 14 Feb 2020, 04:15 »

You take your like and you get out.
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cybersmurf

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1958 on: 14 Feb 2020, 09:05 »

What's a vacuum's favourite dance?

The roomba.
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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1959 on: 24 Feb 2020, 23:49 »

A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.

The rabbit says, I think I might be a type o.
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cybersmurf

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1960 on: 27 Feb 2020, 02:56 »

Bloody hell.
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LTK

Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1961 on: 01 Mar 2020, 06:37 »

No matter how meaty you are, a falling star is meteor.
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Quote from: snalin
I just got the image of a midwife and a woman giving birth swinging towards each other on a trapeze - when they meet, the midwife pulls the baby out. The knife juggler is standing on the floor and cuts the umbilical cord with a a knifethrow.

TorporChambre

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« Reply #1962 on: 18 Mar 2020, 23:56 »

Indian taxors discovered a northern dwarf who, supernaturally, made alotta taxfree. When asked about his sharp double-entendre rejoindery, by which he eludes prosecution, his only comment was ``I eat Punjabi for breakfast.''
Brute force is neither a solution nor a base for one.
At least I'm not a mid-range computer + low-end pen.
« Last Edit: 19 Mar 2020, 00:16 by TorporChambre »
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LeeC

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1963 on: 16 Apr 2020, 18:11 »

How do glasses help you with math?

(click to show/hide)

Also these sailor moon fan comics are just great:
https://imgur.com/t/sailor_venus/f8TH7

I've never seen the show, but this comic makes Sailor Venus my favorite.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1964 on: 08 May 2020, 08:07 »

I went to Southern California and had breakfast on the beach. It was the worst waffle I ever had: a sandy Eggo.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1965 on: 08 May 2020, 11:48 »

I went to Southern California and had breakfast on the beach. It was the worst waffle I ever had: a sandy Eggo.

Stay classy, Cesium.  :roll:
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LeeC

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1966 on: 24 May 2020, 21:15 »

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1967 on: 27 May 2020, 04:46 »

I felt I didn't know enough about excavating, so I got myself a digtionary.
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Case

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1968 on: 27 May 2020, 06:24 »

I felt I didn't know enough about excavating, so I got myself a digtionary.

*Glares daggers into cybersmurf*
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1969 on: 27 May 2020, 16:14 »

That pun paid off in spaaaaaaheyheyheygeddawayfrommeCase
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1970 on: 28 May 2020, 01:33 »

Miner complaint, but we're kinda hitting rock bottom here aren't we?
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1971 on: 28 May 2020, 05:05 »

There are depths not yet plumbed. Dig?
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RedWolf4

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1972 on: 28 May 2020, 07:00 »

Dug.
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cybersmurf

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1973 on: 28 May 2020, 09:26 »

If I hurt myself in autumn, does that count as fall damage?
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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1974 on: 28 May 2020, 18:22 »

In Australia, if you fall while you march, April may.
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LeeC

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1975 on: 06 Jun 2020, 19:38 »

How do you cut the Roman Empire in half? You use Caesars!
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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1976 on: 07 Jun 2020, 20:03 »

Please tell me that’s not how you pronounce scissors.
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cybersmurf

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1977 on: 14 Jul 2020, 12:24 »

Stolen, but makes me chuckle every time:

What's the difference between the bird flu, and the swine flu?
One needs tweetment, the other one needs oinkment.
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Akima

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1978 on: 15 Jul 2020, 18:46 »

Are you going too watch the World Origami Championships?
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RedWolf4

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1979 on: 15 Jul 2020, 21:15 »

I imagine it got exactly as wooden a response then as it did now.
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TorporChambre

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A nonrandom arbitrary
« Reply #1980 on: 25 Jul 2020, 21:22 »

My exoärchæological research had me on the 4th orb Solfrom. My boredom, so great, made my next hobby textile---abandoned post-case; reëxcavation by my contemporary's despite me initiative lent it vexillological stature. In memorium of that, dignitaries observed.
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cybersmurf

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1981 on: 26 Jul 2020, 11:31 »

Have you heard about the new hip apple based alcoholic beverage?
It's an in cider.
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