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Author Topic: QC Captions Vol. 145  (Read 10345 times)

iduguphergrave

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QC Captions Vol. 145
« on: 15 Dec 2013, 13:39 »

Good afternoon, all. COLD ENOUGH FOR YA



Enjoy
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RightInTheSquishyParts

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #1 on: 15 Dec 2013, 14:16 »

CLAIRE:  BWRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP
FAYE:  "Fantastic, coming along nicely."
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #2 on: 15 Dec 2013, 14:17 »

CLAIRE:  BWRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP
FAYE:  "Fantastic, coming along nicely."

I didn't know Claire was a chav.
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #3 on: 15 Dec 2013, 15:04 »

Faye:  "Sorry, the fans have spoken, Claire you will continue to be shipped with Marten, until our Lord Jeph gives us a sign."

Claire:  "I don't suppose WE have anything to say about this?"
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Mr_Rose

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #4 on: 15 Dec 2013, 15:14 »

Magistrix Faye: "Congratulations dear, you appear to have achieved Human Summoning! Need to work on the spelling though."

Apprentice Claire: "All right! Now for the paddling pool full of chocolate sauce."
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #5 on: 15 Dec 2013, 17:17 »

FAYE: "Again!"
CLAIRE: "I am Elmer J. Fudd, millionaire! I own a mansion und a yacht!"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #6 on: 15 Dec 2013, 19:08 »

Well, the Random comic option has entirely failed me, so...

CLAIRE: The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!
FAYE: By George, she's got it!
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #7 on: 15 Dec 2013, 19:51 »

FAYE: "Top ten opera lyrics, sung by a library intern! Number Two!"
CLAIRE: "I'm often asked / If singing high and loud / Can actually break a glass / Of course, as a pro, my voice can shatter stuff / If I may demonstrate for you right nowwwwww ..."
(mugs shatter)
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cesium133

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #8 on: 15 Dec 2013, 20:03 »

Random comic, slightly paraphrased
Faye: She, uh, had a little accident.
Claire: You try being used as a human shield by a scimitar-wielding monk and see how your bladder holds up!
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #9 on: 15 Dec 2013, 21:24 »

Faye: "Close your eyes and visualize inner peace."
Claire: "All I'm getting is butts."
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #10 on: 15 Dec 2013, 21:34 »

Faye: "Close your eyes and visualize inner peace."
Claire: "All I'm getting is butts."
FAYE: "Give peas a chance, then."
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #11 on: 16 Dec 2013, 04:22 »

Faye: "Good. This time, say it without the bitter undertones."
Claire: "Fine... I'M A PRETTY, PRETTY PRINCESS!"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #12 on: 16 Dec 2013, 11:47 »

Faye: First you take the lid, then *carefully* stage it on to the cup. Then, only after you're assured a proper fit, only then do you push down on it being careful to do it evenly to all sides-
Claire: I DON'T NEED COFFEE CUP LESSONS!  I'M SORRY I SPILLED MY LATTE!
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #13 on: 16 Dec 2013, 16:46 »

Random Mode, ENGAGE!

CLAIRE: "Oh man, that is the worst bruise I have ever had! OW!"
FAYE: "Serves you right, playing a trick like that on an innocent girl such as me."
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #14 on: 16 Dec 2013, 23:42 »

Faye: "Congratulations, Claire, yours measures at about a foot longer than Martens."
Claire: "Can I open my eyes again?"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #15 on: 17 Dec 2013, 01:19 »

Her hair, of course.  :angel:
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Thrudd

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #16 on: 17 Dec 2013, 08:57 »

I was thinking spleen but hair is also a good answer.

FAYE:      I want to see how you measure up. Come along, then. Quickly. Head up. Don't slouch.
FAYE:      [after using measuring tape] Just as I thought. Extremely punnicious and prone to jumping to conclusions.
CLAIRE:  I am not!
FAYE:      See for yourself.
CLAIRE:  [reading tape measure]  Extremely punnicious and pro....
FAYE:  .. and prone to jumping to conclusions.
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #17 on: 17 Dec 2013, 11:09 »

A joke which is funny because the punchline could be Claire's trans status runs dangerously close to breaking the rules. A joke where that is the punchline definitely breaks the rules.
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #18 on: 17 Dec 2013, 18:08 »

Yes. In other words, "ahem".
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Soulsynger

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #19 on: 17 Dec 2013, 23:07 »

Oh, ambiguity, save me...?

I'm sorry about that, the internet has ruined me. For a moment I forgot the houserules about that topic.
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Loki

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #20 on: 18 Dec 2013, 02:46 »

Which, of course, are in place to remind us that there may be real people sitting on the other side of the screen, with real names like Rhianne or heck, Claire, and real histories.

I'd insert a witty capture here, but my random-fu is failing me.
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ankhtahr

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #21 on: 18 Dec 2013, 02:49 »

I wouldn't even say houserules. The rules aren't there, because it's not okay to make jokes about this here , but because it's not okay in general.
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #22 on: 18 Dec 2013, 04:07 »

Okay, while I DO understand that people can be / are sensitive about this and I DO understand that some topics are not to be made fun of, I'm still a bit baffled.
I've been here for the entirety of the Claire-discussions when they first arose during the lakehouse party arc, so I think I learned quite a few things and have grown to be much more understanding of the people involved.

However, I also DO think that there is a difference between a cruel jape and a crude joke.

Maybe I should ask for this to be deleted so it doesn't end up as another boiling-pot-discussion.  :-\
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jwhouk

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #23 on: 18 Dec 2013, 05:30 »

Back to random mode...

FAYE: "Did you just grab my ass?"
CLAIRE: "If I say no does it mean I get to now?"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #24 on: 18 Dec 2013, 07:14 »

Faye: "Congratulations, we have our winner!"
Claire: "Ah ahm tha greatest! The best there ever was!"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #25 on: 18 Dec 2013, 07:20 »

Joining in the random train :roll: With some modifications :roll:
Faye: "He only goes for tall women."
Claire: "Well, may be I'll wear platforms heels."
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #26 on: 18 Dec 2013, 07:36 »

Not random. I went hunting.

FAYE: "... and people dress up all old-timey except with gears and goggles and ... "
CLAIRE: "God DAMN it!"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #27 on: 18 Dec 2013, 07:42 »

(thoughtful mod mode)You're not in trouble. I don't think for an instant that you meant to cause pain but crude jokes in mixed company will have that effect. It's a very real thing. You're a DHB, DHBs avoid things like that.

The mods have actually gotten "don't walk on eggshells" advice from a trans activist but we still want to ring alarm bells before the line gets crossed.

I'm available for PM if you have more questions!
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #28 on: 18 Dec 2013, 07:45 »

Faye: "Can you touch your hands together with your eyes closed?"
Claire: "For the last time, I dropped something once, I'm not Cosette!"
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Pilchard123

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #29 on: 18 Dec 2013, 10:32 »

Dank, hollow bratwurst? Dirigible-holding basement?
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #30 on: 18 Dec 2013, 11:02 »

Decent Human Being?
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #31 on: 18 Dec 2013, 11:06 »

That makes more sense.
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #32 on: 18 Dec 2013, 12:31 »


Faye: "D.H.B."
Claire: "Aber ich möchte nicht eine Hausfrau sein!"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #33 on: 18 Dec 2013, 12:41 »

CLAIRE: "We have blueberry, raspberry, ginseng, sleepy time, green tea, green tea with lemon, green tea with lemon and honey, liver disaster, ginger with honey, ginger without honey, vanilla almond, white truffel, blueberry chamomile, vanilla walnut, constant comment and... earl grey. "

FAYE: "It's still called COFFEE of Doom, Pilgrim! Again!"
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iduguphergrave

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #34 on: 18 Dec 2013, 12:47 »

O-kay let's try again with the SECOND IMAGE:

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #35 on: 18 Dec 2013, 12:51 »

MOMO:  Most of these captions will imply we're about to get sexy in some way...
HANNERS:  OH GOD FLUI--  Nevermind you're a robot.  Lets go.
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #36 on: 18 Dec 2013, 13:03 »

Momo: Omelette du fromage. . .

Hanners: Oh my GOD!! SHE'S STUCK ON MEME!!!
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #37 on: 18 Dec 2013, 14:10 »

 Random Comic ...not

 Hannelore: I've...never been with a robot before...
 Momo: I promise I'll be gentle.
« Last Edit: 18 Dec 2013, 19:06 by K1dmor »
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #38 on: 18 Dec 2013, 14:16 »

Momo: Help me obi-wan kenobi, you're my only hope!
Hanners: How did you find me!?
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #39 on: 18 Dec 2013, 16:10 »

MOMO. "You show up in other people's apartments, sneak looks at them having sexytimes -- oh, don't deny it -- and try to maneuver them into relationshops and 'a reasonable number of babies,' whatever that is, snoop in their sex toys and you freak out about YOUR personal space? Really?"
WINSLOW (behind door): "WHAT are you doing with that OTHER computer?"

Edit: Fixed "behink." Should know better about using tiny keyboard where spelling counts.
« Last Edit: 18 Dec 2013, 21:02 by DSL »
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #40 on: 18 Dec 2013, 16:29 »

Momo: "You have a beetle in your nose. Let me pull it out."
Hannelore: "Aughh!"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #41 on: 18 Dec 2013, 18:32 »

Random Comic

 Hannelore: I've...never been with a robot before...
 Momo: I promise I'll be gentle.

Random my butt. :P
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iduguphergrave

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #42 on: 18 Dec 2013, 18:42 »

I share your skepticism, jwhouk  :police:
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #43 on: 18 Dec 2013, 19:35 »

Momo: "Quick, take your glucosamine before your elbow starts screaming in pain!"
Elbow: "Too late!"
« Last Edit: 19 Dec 2013, 07:22 by Is it cold in here? »
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #44 on: 19 Dec 2013, 03:42 »

Mono:  "I've had a glimpse of the future - everybody fucks.  Except you."

Hanners:  "What!?!"
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #45 on: 19 Dec 2013, 10:02 »

CLAIRE: "We have blueberry, raspberry, ginseng, sleepy time, green tea, green tea with lemon, green tea with lemon and honey, liver disaster, ginger with honey, ginger without honey, vanilla almond, white truffel, blueberry chamomile, vanilla walnut, constant comment and... earl grey. "

FAYE: "It's still called COFFEE of Doom, Pilgrim! Again!"
Love that movie.
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jwhouk

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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #46 on: 19 Dec 2013, 13:01 »

Random Comic Attempt #2

MOMO: "Really? Wow, what kinda jerk would leave YOU hangin' like that?"
HANNELORE: "Oh, it wasn't on purpose. I don't think he even realizes he did it."
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #47 on: 19 Dec 2013, 13:26 »

Random comic, first try:
Momo: and she had this giant hairy mole right by her-
Hanners: OKAY, ENOUGH, THANK YOU

...Or is it better with the characters switched?
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #48 on: 19 Dec 2013, 15:22 »

Actually, either works really. Depends on who you think they're referring to and why. :P
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Re: QC Captions Vol. 145
« Reply #49 on: 19 Dec 2013, 23:42 »

Hannelore: "This can't be happening. This just CAN'T be happening!"
Momo: "Ooooh, Sousuuuuke-kuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun..."
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