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[JD]

congratulations

[A Wet Helmet]

According to her text message, my daughter just won a bass playing competition and was complimented by five time grammy winner Vic Wooten on her ability to keep time.

I will be a proud father for awhile.

[David_Dovey]

Yeah, come 5pm I'm jobless.

I thought you had like three goddamn jobs

[David_Dovey]

If I took off yr shoes I could see the jobs growing off yr feet

[Patrick]

Yesterday, my best friend turned 21. Today, my body is telling me "Fuck you man that's not funny."

Also, we're all officially quitting open mic. We've finally had enough of the abuse from douchebag diva musicians. We're tired of not getting paid for the work we do, which is considerably harder than we ever get recognition for. One of the regulars even came into my work the other day and said to me straight faced that we didn't deserve to get paid because we don't do anything. Fucking. Bullshit.

So I talked to Lukas, I talked to Lindsay, and we spoke to our buddy and mentor Elvis Bob. And Elvis Bob spoke with the owner. The owner said "Why should I pay for this? I can just have you do it for free like before, Bob." And Elvis Bob told him that he wasn't gonna do it for free anymore either. So now the owner's found somebody willing and dumb enough to play and work for free (god love the new guy, he's one of my dearest friends, but zero business/common sense).

Whatever, my lady's down for the weekend. I'm abuot to bounce to spend time with her. Laaaaaaaata

[sean]

i dunno, maybe this opinion is wack, but i dont expect musicians to play at an open mic. though, what do you mean by open mic? cause i mean, when i think of an open mic, i just think of any kind of venue (house to bar to actual legit venue) hosting an event where anyone can show up (usually for free, i guess pay if its a venue venue (so dumb)) and anyone can sign up and play, if they do it in time. though, it sounds like you play this open mic a lot, and in a professional manner too, so maybe open mics are different on that side of the country? derp i dunno i just wouldn't expect to get paid for an event that is an open mic, cause like, any asshole can play at that.

[Christophe]

I believe Pat is referring to running an open mic, which would require running sound, making sure dudes kept within their alloted time et al. I made my bones helping to run sound for an open mic night and it is now a thing I do every Monday and get paid for doing, as well as the live music shows on Wednesday and Saturday.

Pat, good show on telling doude owner to take job and shove it, because open mic can simultaneously be exhilarating (if you get a string of good performers that just fucking bang it out of the park) and frustrating (for any number of reasons, including idiot who doesn't know how a mic works and points it at the monitors, dude who asks for one more song when he's already done three and you want to get the next guy on, rapper who gives you his songs on two different cds and one USB dongle, best man and bride-to-be thinking it's a good idea to get up on stage while you cue up "Barbie Girl" on youtube while they make total fools of themselves [man I'll never live down allowing that to happen although they seemed to take it in stride], oh hey also barely anyone signed up at all today) at the same time, and it's the latter part of the job that should at least net you some dough.

[Lines]

Last night was lets have the whole building wake up Lindsey night. Last night was if I have to leave my room to tell you to be quiet, I'm going to murder you night. I am not going to have fun at work today.

Also Pat, good for you for wanting to get paid. There's a bar here that has a live band that plays for karaoke and open mic and those guys definitely get paid to be there. I hope you can find a gig somewhere else that will be willing to do so.

[tania]

i love redoing these in-text citations so much, i want to take them behind a middle school and get them pregnant

[sean]

oh dang, who the fuck would run an open mic for free? sorry for misinterpreting, but goddamn that is fucked if yr not getting paid to run an open mic, get a better gig and fuck the guy not paying you. in the butt. WITH SHARP OBJECTS CAUSE THAT IS NOT COOL!

[Jace]

Yeah, come 5pm I'm jobless.

I thought you had like three goddamn jobs

I was doing good with just the one, so I quit the other I had, and I guess I'm not really jobless, I'm still employed by the company, but the contract they had with the bank was eliminated. There are a couple of other contracts that could work in my favor though, there's a 4000 hour/week catholic health (hospitals and shit) and a 1700 hour/week Fedex, possible 1000 hour/week with UPS too, so, there's options at least.

[Slick]

I was really really confused about your figures until I realized that was like, total hours on the contract to your company. Which of those gigs would you most like to grab if you could?

[Jace]

Probably the FedEx, as you get to work with someone else (one patrolling and one stationed) and other than patrolling you sit in a chair and hold employee cell phones until their shift is over. UPS could be fun, because you get to climb all over trains all day.

[Metope]

UPS fucking suuuucks they can't do anything right. Go with FedEx.

[Jace]

I'm not really working for that company, I'm just pretending to secure their stuff. Also, FedEx pays $10/hr and UPS pays $9/hr, so I'd rather do Fedex based on getting more money

[Liz]

Fuck yeah FedEx.

[Hairy Joe Bob]

Fuck yeah FedEx.

said the randy postmistress.

[Hairy Joe Bob]

My girlfriend bought me some Thai fisherman trousers.

They are possibly the most comfortable things I have EVER worn on the bottom half of my body. Oh yeahhhh.

[Inlander]

A few years ago I essentially stopped wearing jeans, and I realised that jeans are actually really restrictive and uncomfortable and 90% of trousers are more comfortable than them. (Note to forum: this is not an invitation to post pictures of ridiculous and deliberately uncomfortable trousers.) Silly world, convincing yourself that jeans are the best pants just because of some vaguely remembered attachment to a "common man" ideal that was lost generations ago!

[Inlander]

Okay guys one of the people on my Sunday stories contact list tipped me off to this competition for SMS stories and I've cut down a bunch of my stories to the requisite 120 characters and I am getting ready to own this thing. First prize is A$3000. Feelin' good, feelin' like a shark in a reef full of clownfish.

[squawk]

i went to go listen to silkworm and looked at the last played timestamps, which led to me trying to remember why i was apparently awake at 3 AM listening to In the West on thursday morning, when i remembered that i was really high and so guitar inspired and also i guess that's why i ended up not going to my only class that day which was at 2 PM. i really need to get back into school habits, it shouldn't take over a week to do so when i was on break for only one week as well

[JD]

A few years ago I essentially stopped wearing jeans, and I realised that jeans are actually really restrictive and uncomfortable and 90% of trousers are more comfortable than them. (Note to forum: this is not an invitation to post pictures of ridiculous and deliberately uncomfortable trousers.) Silly world, convincing yourself that jeans are the best pants just because of some vaguely remembered attachment to a "common man" ideal that was lost generations ago!

Whatever man my jeans are mega comfortable.

[Inlander]

I used to think that too.

[Jimmy the Squid]

A few years ago I essentially stopped wearing jeans, and I realised that jeans are actually really restrictive and uncomfortable and 90% of trousers are more comfortable than them. (Note to forum: this is not an invitation to post pictures of ridiculous and deliberately uncomfortable trousers.) Silly world, convincing yourself that jeans are the best pants just because of some vaguely remembered attachment to a "common man" ideal that was lost generations ago!

I like jeans. I haven't really found other trousers that are as comfortable or that look the way I like either. I'm ok with this though, I am comfortable enough though I guess it would be nice to not have my pants fall down around my arse all the time despite the fact that I'm wearing a belt.

Okay guys one of the people on my Sunday stories contact list tipped me off to this competition for SMS stories and I've cut down a bunch of my stories to the requisite 120 characters and I am getting ready to own this thing. First prize is A$3000. Feelin' good, feelin' like a shark in a reef full of clownfish.

Go Harry!, kick the shit out of them!

[The Seldom Killer]

I wore four different pairs of trousers this weekend, the jeans were as comfortable an others. Mind you, I do take care to buy comfortable jeans, which is pretty important.

[Barmymoo]

I only own one pair of trousers and it is jeans. They are too big which is a little awkward and the belt is uncomfortable but the jeans themselves are ok. I need to buy more trousers, it seems.

Two weeks til I leave Paris, guys! And in reality more like nine days because I'm going on a choir tour for the last few days so I won't be around to work any more. Five more working days. I feel kind of stuck in limbo here now and just want to lie in bed all day so that it goes more quickly. There are a few things I want to see before I leave (couple of museums, Versailles and maybe the Arc de Triomphe again) but everything is shut on Mondays so... might get up and have lunch...

[Patrick]

oh dang, who the fuck would run an open mic for free?

Me. For the better half of a year now. Hell, I wish I'd realized it was a stupid idea to do it for free.

What's really infuriating to me is that this fucker has strung us along for the entire time, saying "If business picks up I'll start paying you guys." Well, now that my friends and I have been building up the event for 8 months and we've literally tripled his fucking business, where's the goddamn money?

We asked him that question once a while back after we had spent a lot of time working on getting the night bigger and bigger, and he offered to pay us in the wine that he makes up at his winery. Yeah, this fool owns a winery, Livermore is excellent wine country and that shit just happens sometimes. The motherfucker's LOADED, and he wants to pay us in his wine. What the fuck am I gonna do with it? I can't sell it, and I don't drink anywhere even CLOSE to a bottle of wine a week. And I sure can't pay rent or buy food with wine, which are oddly enough two of my biggest problems right now. I want the rate I was promised for the conditions I promised to meet, and then proceeded to surpass.

I have half a mind to call up Andy (my replacement) and see if he won't do me a solid by telling the owner to go fuck himself dry. I know better than to ask for a letter of recommendation from a man who steals (a liar and a thief are all the same), because I can't imagine I'm the only person he's fucked over before. But I don't think I'm going to sit idly by while some douche takes advantage of poor naive saps like us.

I just wish I'd gotten that fucker's word in writing so I could sue him for this bullshit. I'm getting evicted and I go hungry more often than not because I'm not getting paid what we agreed on. I honestly wonder if I shouldn't just call him on his mobile someday and tell him exactly what I've had to eat all day. Just so the son of a bitch can hear the effects of what happens to the people you lie to and steal from.

[Inlander]

Okay guys one of the people on my Sunday stories contact list tipped me off to this competition for SMS stories and I've cut down a bunch of my stories to the requisite 120 characters and I am getting ready to own this thing. First prize is A$3000. Feelin' good, feelin' like a shark in a reef full of clownfish.

Go Harry!, kick the shit out of them!

Like a tiger in a jungle full of fat men on elephants.

[nekowafer]

I only wear jeans anymore. They are the only things that even come close to looking good on my big butt. And the only other pants I've ever liked as much were Tripp bondage pants and I'm trying to be a grown-up so I don't wear them anymore.

Dear Bloggy-thing:

Things are finally picking up at work. After a few months of pretty much making up shit to do around the office, I finally have stuff to do. A lot of stuff. I seem to have more than anyone else on the team. I am starting a new doctor with our practice (maybe 10 applications to fill out), starting two doctors in Delaware (another 5 applications for each doc), starting a doctor at a new hospital (one application, but I have to teach a new girl to do it as well), then showing the two new girls how to do the applications for the Residents that help us out. Which are not difficult, but they take time, which will be tripled with showing completely green people how to do them.

The problem here is that I look like I'm kissing ass. But I can't give away any of my responsibilities, or I'll look like I can't handle the work. And I've really had to work hard to get management to notice that I can do more. I hoped that the other girls would get that I'm honestly just trying to help the team, but it seems this is not the case. Oh well. There's really nothing I can do about it. I am kicking butt, though! I've had tons of compliments from the doctors I work with and it makes me feel awesome.

"Elesia,
Happy credentialing day! Hope you are having a great day. Thanks for doing the hard, tedious work for me, I'd never get those never-ending forms filled out correctly. You are AWESOME! I pledge to complete the forms faster this year!
Enjoy your special day, thanks again for everything,
Dr. Brennan"

I look at this when I'm feeling like crap at my job and it makes me smile

[Slick]

oh dang, who the fuck would run an open mic for free?

I have half a mind to call up Andy (my replacement) and see if he won't do me a solid by telling the owner to go fuck himself dry.

There's a power in an open mic, there's a power in a bar, there's a power in the hands of the performer, but it all amounts to nothing if together we don't stand...

[Boro_Bandito]

Like a tiger in a jungle full of fat men on elephants.

Tiger?

[Zingoleb]

I got drunk over the weekend for the first time in a few years. It was amazing. I got girls who called me cute and a roller derby girl (LeeAnnderthal) gave me her number, and I ended outside of a restaurant managing to sing some kind of solo medley of Bohemian Rhapsody and Sweet Transvestite. Though in hindsight it was probably less of a medley so much as I forgot the words and just meshed into the other. So. MEDLEY.

[David_Dovey]

A few years ago I essentially stopped wearing jeans, and I realised that jeans are actually really restrictive and uncomfortable and 90% of trousers are more comfortable than them. (Note to forum: this is not an invitation to post pictures of ridiculous and deliberately uncomfortable trousers.) Silly world, convincing yourself that jeans are the best pants just because of some vaguely remembered attachment to a "common man" ideal that was lost generations ago!

Full-grown man trousers high five o/

[Lunchbox]

I don't drink anywhere even CLOSE to a bottle of wine a week.

What is wrong with you

[valley_parade]

I'm lucky if I have a glass of wine a week, Ally.

[David_Dovey]

Wine is yucky, real talk

[pwhodges]

Off on holiday tomorrow!  12 days in Sri Lanka.

[valley_parade]

I had a pretty nice beer at a hockey game yesterday. Saranac Black Forest, it's kinda like Sam Adams' Black Lager, but brewed in Upstate New York and a bit tastier.

[Lunchbox]

Red wine is the most delicious thing and if my boyfriend and I don't drink an entire bottle over dinner at least once a week we are not doing it right.

[valley_parade]

I did, the other week, learn that wine can be aged in steel barrels instead of wood?

The bartender at the place we were at had me try two different chardonnays. I much preferred the steel-aged one.



Addendum: I'm really not much versed in wine. I do know that I like reds better than whites, and that I am a fan of Shiraz.

[valley_parade]

There were no "woody" tastes to it. I prefer my wine to taste like wine, instead of like trees.

Honestly, I prefer beer over wine. But I am not a beer snob. As much as I like a solid, dark microbrew..I'm also happy with PBR or Miller High Life.

[Lunchbox]

I prefer beer AND wine. I am a little bit of a beer snob but I am not a wine snob at all. Cheap red wine tastes the same as good red wine. Whatevs.

[valley_parade]

I'm finding recently that New York, despite being a fairly shitty place, does have some good beer. Saranac, which I mentioned before, does some sheer deliciousness, while downstate, The Brooklyn Brewery is pretty bad ass. Definitely give their Summer Ale a try if you get a shot.

[Inlander]

There is no better drink to drink during a summer thunder storm than a nice glass of white wine. Many are the times I've sat happily in my doorway watching the lightning and the rain crash down on a warm evening with a glass of white wine in my hand.

[squawk]

franzia is my favorite. but i'm also nineteen and very, very classy

[ackblom12]

Franzia is the only wine I have ever liked sadly.

[scarred]

I've been drinking a lot more wine lately. I like red wine best. Champagne gives me headaches as I drink it.

[squawk]

it (franzia) basically just tastes like juice that gets you drunk! and you get this big ol' catheter of wine for really cheap! what's not to love?

[Ozymandias]

The only good wine is sangria you fucks.

[Patrick]

I don't drink anywhere even CLOSE to a bottle of wine a week.

What is wrong with you

More things than I care to think about.

HEY GUYS does anybody wanna help me move my shit from Livermore to Berkeley this Sunday? The only people who were willing to help me are now making like Catholics and pulling out, and now I am shitting myself so fucking hard that I don't know which way to aim it all