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[20 jazz funk greats]

PIES THE SIZE OF A REALLY BIG CAT.

i could go for one of these.  om nom nom nom.  (however i would not eat a pie made of cats.)

dear blog thread,

my apartment is ridiculously cold. 

time to wear huge baggy sweatshirts and drink lots of tea and cuddle up with a cute boy while watching entourage.<3 i am missing the cute boy part though because he doesn't live in my city. but that's not a big deal. i'm not lonely or anything.

i don't know if any of you pay attention to my rants about school (and it's okay if you don't because they're not anything exciting. i don't even like writing them too much), but i am not as freaked out about it as i was earlier even though not much has changed. i just feel like it's not as serious a  problem as i originally thought. all i need to do is get my midterms over and done with and start attending class on a more regular basis. i can easily do that. i believe in myself.

love,
a way more cheerful anna

[ViolentDove]

Dear diary blog thread,

Cloning stuff is nowhere near as interesting as it sounds.

Warm regards etc. etc.

-Nick.

[SonofZ3]

I was talking with my friend Jenny the other day and she sent me a pic of a squirrel with a piece of pocky. She commented that it looked like it had some sort of weapon and we ended up jking about squirrels having little samurai battles. Then it really made me kinda disturbed that we both found the idea of war in animal life funny. War is terrible in humans, why do we (or at least some of us) find the concept of war in the things lucky enough not to have it to be amusing?

[Slick]

So I am going to a zine fair on Saturday. With a zine. About baking. And selling baked goods!

(hey anna what are you up to Saturday? Starlight, doors open at 1PM, runs till later in the day)

[20 jazz funk greats]

i don't have any plans for saturday yet, james.
my parents may want me to come home though. hmmm...decisions.

[Slick]

Well I am not offering internet discounts. If you want hand-made croissant, you will have to pay for it.

[20 jazz funk greats]

but i'm kinda broke 

[Vendetagainst]

Dear diary blog thread,

Cloning stuff is nowhere near as interesting as it sounds.

YES IT IS. Look beyond the dense and dull terminology and what you have is very awesome.

[Dimmukane]

I'm now officially allowed to drink and don't have anything to drink.  I'm going to just pretend that I downed a bottle and act accordingly tonight.

[Liz]

One of the best feelings in life:

Getting back a paper that says "A+ Thank you for the great read."

...I don't think this has ever happened to me.

[squawk]

i honestly cannot remember the last time i ever had a truly clear thought

nor can i fathom it happening any time soon. but i hope it does.

[ViolentDove]

YES IT IS. Look beyond the dense and dull terminology and what you have is very awesome.

Well, yeah. I was talking more about the actual process involved, which is mainly moving small bits of liquid from A to B. And then into C. And then C is all "Look at me, I've got DNA from A, fuck you antibiotics!"

At least that's what I imagine them saying to keep myself entertained.

[Emaline]

Emaline you are rad and you should do rad things. Have you tried doing arty things? Any kind of creative process might make you feel better.

I think this actually sorta sparked my depression. For the past few days at work, I have been working strictly on our Halloween display, and that is it. This means carving things out of scrap cardboard, and spray painting a lot. I realize I'm at my best doing these things, I am playful, and friendly, and socialible, and everyone really likes me in general when I am doing creative things. I am pretty stress free when I do those things.

What has me down is I know it won't last. I can't work on displays forever. I can't do arty things all the time at work, and that makes me miserible. For awhile I used to make postcards for money. This was when I first moved back home, and I had some money saved to pay my one bill, so I made art for going out money. I don't even have time for that now. I don't have time to sit down and draw. And god it frustrates me. I want to quit my job and just focus on art. But I have $200 in bills to pay every month, which will triple soon. And I can't make $600 a month on art alone.

[Elizzybeth]

Today was pretty cool.  It was a professor-less day. Of my four classes, two were cancelled: one professor was sick, and the other was at a conference in New York.  The other two classes were student-led, more like study groups: one professor had a doctor's appointment, and the last was at a conference in D.C.  The student-led classes drove home the fact that graduate school is more about the critical conversations and less about making learning absolute and hierarchical, which makes me really happy.

Then, when I got home, my boyfriend had gone to the farmer's market and bought a half flat of strawberries, and my package of stuff from a local coffee house (shipping was about as much as bus fare) had arrived in the mail.  This package had three bags of coffee (a mixed espresso roast, a dark French roast, and a Dutch chocolate roast), two bags of loose leaf tea (jasmine green and raspberry black), and this:



When I saw this picture on the company's website, I couldn't believe it and bought the mug pretty much just in support of their audacity (evidently it's from a San Francisco artist named Win Ng, who has designed a bunch of really cute mugs).  Part of me feels kind of dirty drinking my coffee out of this thing every morning, but the rest of me is giggling.  It's a mug with fucking bunnies!  So many fucking bunnies!

[Liz]

Oh man. I want the penguin one SO MUCH.

[Patrick]

So some dude is starting a fencing club in Albania and I am SO FUCKING JOINING. There is nothing I like more than poking people with shit and getting applauded for it.

[KvP]

So I went to see a friend's band play tonight, and it was really great. There was some disappointment, though. The first opener (my friend's band was the second) was a terrible jock-rock band that closed out their set with a cover of "Bulls on Parade". I was in the back listening to Radiohead for their set. But that wasn't the bad part. What was bad was that since it was a Thursday night and so many of the audience had class the next day, the crowd started pretty full for the first opener, and the crowd thinned out a little more every song. My friend's band had a decent crowd for it, but the actual main event, The Switchback (who I guess are the biggest indie group in CO, I suppose I'll put their stuff up in the mediafire thread soon) had less than half a dozen audience members by the end of their set, despite them putting on a pretty impressive show. I blame whoever set it up, as the first band started playing at 9:30. At real, grown-up shows, the main attraction usually takes the stage by that time.

Anyway, that was fun, I drank some and played some pool with some pretty girls (you know what I didn't realize makes you more confident in your appearance? Alcohol! Who knew?!) and after the show we all headed to the band's house and hung out. I talked to the synth player for the band, and he's apparently no more skilled in his instrument than I am. He floated the idea of recording music once their album is cut, which I guess confirmed as real what I had sort of assumed was idle talk by a flaky creative type (my friend had previously suggested we record). According to the synth player we likely won't be playing any live shows, so it'll be all studio stuff. So really, if it comes to fruition it'll be about exactly as I want it to be.

Ah, also, the guy wants me to teach him how to use Reason, which I haven't fully figured out yet myself. But hey, the best way to learn is to teach, no?

[Eris]

My internet wouldn't connect until about an hour ago (it's about 7:30 here now), so I got a bit bored. I played a lot of solitaire today (that sounds like a euphemism; it's not. I played the computer version of the card game), which made me realise that I lose at solitaire a fair bit and that I play it way too much. I have played about 4429 games and my longest winning streak is 5 games. My longest losing streak is 28 games. I think I might just possibly need a life.

[Tom]

Dear diary blog thread,

Cloning stuff is nowhere near as interesting as it sounds.

YES IT IS. Look beyond the dense and dull terminology and what you have is very awesome.

Well, the concept certainly is.

[SonofZ3]

One of the best feelings in life:

Getting back a paper that says "A+ Thank you for the great read."

...I don't think this has ever happened to me.

What sucks is when you a professor that asks "did you write out a response to _________?" and you say "No, I spent an innordinate ammount of time drining bottom shelf gin yesterday" and they say "Thats too bad, I was really looking forward to reading what you had to say"

[tuna ketchup x]

Emaline you are rad and you should do rad things. Have you tried doing arty things? Any kind of creative process might make you feel better.

I think this actually sorta sparked my depression. For the past few days at work, I have been working strictly on our Halloween display, and that is it. This means carving things out of scrap cardboard, and spray painting a lot. I realize I'm at my best doing these things, I am playful, and friendly, and socialible, and everyone really likes me in general when I am doing creative things. I am pretty stress free when I do those things.

What has me down is I know it won't last. I can't work on displays forever. I can't do arty things all the time at work, and that makes me miserible. For awhile I used to make postcards for money. This was when I first moved back home, and I had some money saved to pay my one bill, so I made art for going out money. I don't even have time for that now. I don't have time to sit down and draw. And god it frustrates me. I want to quit my job and just focus on art. But I have $200 in bills to pay every month, which will triple soon. And I can't make $600 a month on art alone.

This is exactly what I was trying to get at with my last post. When you have a sucky job, doing amazing things that make you feel good is worse than just curling up in front of the television, because the discrepancy between your "good times" and your "bad times" is just so severe. But if my nights are gray then it won't be as hard to segue into a black day. Ideally, you'd have light and light (or light and gray), but I can't handle this schizophrenic dual-life thing. And my mood shows it, that I'm in gray or black most of the time, half of the time of my own devising.

[öde]

I'm glad I don't have a job!

[Slick]

I've baked a bunch of cookies I'm on no sleep I'm about to make a sponge for tomorrow's bread and I hope I'll be alive in 60 hours from now. I've also got to program a numerical PDE solver for a simulation of shallow water in a box.
For those of you on Dan's forum, I've just stuck my zine up there hoping for last-minute proofreading/reviewing/critiquing if anyone has some time to spare and wants to read what I've written about baking.

[RedLion]

 The coming of winter always puts me in a blue mood. It's only the late end of October, but I'm already feeling down. I like drinking hot chocolate or coffee/cappuccino during winter, I like cuddling up close to a lady under blankets when it's cold, and for awhile, the snow is beautiful. But pretty soon everything is dead, frozen, barren, gray, cloudy..I can't stand it. I need sunlight and at least relative warmth. I love this state, and so many of the places where I want to live in this country, if I do stay and live in this country very long after college, are in the north. But I can't handle winter.

How do you guys beat the winter doldrums?

[Alex C]

By enjoying winter immensely.

[Liz]

I don't. I hate winter and the cold and the snow and the dreary and I get all sad.

More people need to visit me so I am not sad!

[Slick]

So I've realized in the past few years that every time the season changes I get all excited and think 'wow, this is an awesome season!' and remember why I love it.

I mean, on average, I'm kind of depressed in life but I really love each and every season and all the kinds of weather.

[RedLion]

By enjoying winter immensely.

Thank you for this. It is greatly appreciated.

[Alex C]

I do what I can.

[allison]

Winter can be pretty rad! Get drunk and go tobogganing. I think people refer to it as "toboozing".

Blog thread, why is this paper so hard to write? I have been working on it for 2 days and I have nothing at all.

[october1983]

I am preparing to deal with this winter by cooking soup. I am cooking a batch of vegetable soup right now and, while it's not perfect, it is looking good for a first try. Basically I love soup and I love hot soup when the whether is cold (especially as we can't really afford to have heating on all the time) and I am going to enjoy this winter just by cooking delicious hot things. If I do other good things, they will simply be a bonus.

Also, to make this less Cooking Thread-y:

Blog thread, there is this girl who is kind of definitely cute who I have met through friends a couple of times who I really like and we talk and it is fun. I am not all that sure whether or not she is into me but that is not going to stop me finding out.

[maxusy3k]

Blog thread,

This is so stupid but I am getting my friend - who is a huge Metallica fan now - all the Metallica releases for Xmas. All the CD's, the S&M DVD, Some Kind of Monster and the stupidly overpriced coffin box Death Magnetic release. Earlier in the week we found out they're playing near where we live in February, and we were both so excited about it.

Today the tickets went on sale and, surprise, the ticket website was all kinds of unable to cope. Since the tickets went up at 9am, which is like, the time I have to leave for work, I could just sit there hammering refresh all day and, basically, they're sold out now I'm home. So no tickets.

And now I am like... he is going to be so down about it, and I feel like I fucked up... and the £200 worth of Xmas presents I got him is just going to be like "HEY GUESS WHAT BAND YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SEE?". This is how I feel, anyway. I am all kinds of not sure what to do now.

Also I am now no longer excited for Xmas. It can suck a cock.

[KickThatBathProf]

If the dude is any sort of friend to you then he's not gonna be mad at you for failing to get tickets for a popular band because you had to work.

[0bsessions]

Dude, how much disposable income do you have that you can spend that on a friend? I spent that much on my brother like once ever. That is a fuckton of money for a friend.

If he ends up pissy over that gift, he is probably an absolute ingrate.

I do feel on the ticket thing, though. As one of the few Metallica fans on this forum, I know how much of a bitch getting tickets to their current tour is. They're playing literally around the corner from my house, but damned if I am going to pay the like $180 for balcony seats that second hand sellers want (Since it sold out in the first like hour).

[Lines]

I see a gift like that more of a "I'm soirry you didn't get to see the band, so here's everything they've ever done." That's a huge gift. Don't be down about it. If your friend doesn't like it, then they are a complete ass.

[0bsessions]

The more I think about this, the more I wonder: is your friend planning to spend that much on your for Christmas? This isn't a give and receive equally deal, it's a "how will he feel about it" deal.

I know when someone spends a fuckton on me and I can't afford to spend it back, I feel like a top class prick. Unless you're both kind of loaded, that much money on a present for anyone but an immediate family member, a significant other (Present, not potential) or someone you've known your whole life and would take a bullet for, that seems like overstepping one's bounds to me.

[Ladybug]

Obsessions has a point. Hell, even with my best friend since elementary school, we've set a limit that is fairly low for presents, because both of us are students (and thus poor as fuck). I've never ever bought a gift that expensive for anyone.

So, uhm, yeah, do not feel bad about not being able to get the tickets. Or, well, I guess I understand that you feel bad, but you shouldn't worry about it.

[maxusy3k]

It is not so much that he would be 'mad' or so, it is that the tickets is something I said I would do, but failed to, and the Xmas stuff is stuff I just am doing anyway. It's not so much an issue either that like, omg our friendship is ruined forever, I mean we're not high school kids, but I just feel like I dropped the ball or something.

Dunno. Pointless self-loating stuff maybe?

0bsessions (posted while I was typings) - the money I have for Xmas is the result of working 69 hour weeks for the past three weeks. It has been fucking awful. I missed my scheduled overtime shift on Sunday because I woke up and literally couldn't open my eyes. It was physically impossible. I've been living on a diet of coke and pro-plus for the better part of a month and I think now I'm starting to hit the comedown.

But hey at least I will be able to buy people kickass presents and keep the economy rolling, right?

On the same token I suppose I could try doing another week or two of stupidty to buy second-hand tickets. I'm going to London to see Coheed in December which is a week-long thing so that is plenty of time to lay on my friends couch asleep between gigs.

(Blatently ignoring other posts so I can write what I was wanting to write goddammit. Ohmigod essay.)

Emaline... you sound like you are almost in the same place I was when I was 20, except for I didn't even have a job. Maybe that made things easier for me, I'm not sure. I was trying to readjust to being on my own - or living with my mother - after 3 years of living with a girl I even proposed to and shit I don't even believe in marriage. I don't really know what to say in the way of advice that isn't "things get better with time" because damn I know how ridiculously un-comforting that is.

All I will say is that I think the idea of living life in greys and blacks sounds like maybe the worst thing. I know having white and black smashing against each other all the time is jarring as hell, but I always found it was the best way to go. For me right now, the 'white' is hanging out with a girl I love devotedly - though we are friends - and being out, getting drunk occasionally, dancing as much as I can and generally living life for the few hours of free time I get away from work. It makes the grind even harder, yes, but eventually it gets into a routine that is comfortable and you can ride it out a lot easier.

You said you had like no friends and that does make my example a little redundant... if you can afford to save up some then try to do that, so maybe you can have some time to switch jobs and pay your bills. If not then try, trytrytry to find a way to branch out while playing the crappy hand you've been dealt. All of that is so much easier said than done, but resigning yourself to mediocrity is probably worse than taking a bullet to your face.

So don't do either plz.

Edit:

or someone you've known your whole life and would take a bullet for, that seems like overstepping one's bounds to me.

Yes that is my best friend.

[Lines]

Depends on the friend. I had a really good friend do something like that (not buy a ton of albums, but spend a lot on me, though nowhere near that much) and it didn't make me feel bad. But I always tried to do extra things for her because of this. But this was my best friend, so if someone else did it, yes, I would feel weird.

[Alex C]

Man, last Christmas I got my brother like a 5 dollar tin of cookies and a homemade card that said he was pretty cool. It was like the second time I ever got him anything.
 

It's too bad I can't trade you some self-centeredness in exchange for some regard-for-other-people. You'd be less neurotic, I'd be more socially acceptable. Everyone would win.

[Slick]

At least it wasn't diet coke.

[Metope]

Blog thread,
 
Today I went to the dentist and found out I have to remove all of my wisdom teeth. I'm not usually scared of dentists, doctors, needles or whatever, but today was really bad. It started with the usual x-ray pics, which seemed ok until the dentist grabbed this huge flat thing that was obviously going to end up in my mouth somehow. I could feel my heart beating faster and the dentist noticed that I was sort of tense, so she tried to relax me, but I dunno... How comforting is it to hear "Aw, don't worry hon. You just relax now while I SHOVE THIS FUCKING SPATULA DOWN YOUR THROAT. It will be fine!" Ok, she probably didn't say that, but that's what I heard, and that's what it felt like. Except for the "fine" part.

So, the dentist looked at the x-rays, raised her eyebrows and shouted to another dentist "Caroline, get in here! Special case for you!", and Caroline came running in all excited: "Oh boy, I haven't had a special case in a looong time!". Sounds good? Not to me. Turns out I have the most backwards tooth position you can get. My wisdom teeth are literally growing sideways! I actually need surgery to remove them, and not the good kind of surgery where you get to sleep during the whole thing, but the kind where your face is paralyzed and you can hear and see everything. Who would have thought my wisdom teeth would be the end of me? Way to go, evolution, way to go!

[sean]

Oh man I had the best train ride to school today. The lights were broken in the train car I was in, so it was completely dark in there and the only light was from lights in the tunnel which gave an awesome effect. It was so awesome.

[Vendetagainst]

Dear NOT HORRIBLE PEOPLE,

I hate my school so much.
 Today I heard use of the n-word three times (all while discussing Obama) and had a conversation with one of my classmates who described his biggest problem with Obama being that "he wants to help poor people". This complements previous remarks made by students such as "I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die" (I know that's a quote, but no less obnoxious) and a meme in which every time Obama's name is mentioned somebody shouts "he's gonna get shot!"

Another note: at least one hundred of the eight-hundred students at my school are black and they get along fine with the white kids. Also, it's a middle class school.
The fact that these kids are so deluded disgusts me more than anything.


Seriously, if I thought my school was any representation of the world at large I would hammer a bullet into my throat.

[Tom]

Dear thread of blogging,

I'm taking Ext. 2 English for my HSC. I'm really looking forward to writing my major work, I just have to work out what it's exactly going to be. I already have a few ideas, such as: cockroaches that rapidly start to progress from a paleolithic cultural stage to an industrial revolution or probably just the classical age (that way I can chuck in Plato references and maybe have their) that cause the protagonist to experience an existential dread and thus question what he initially thought made him human.

I'm also in Year 12 now, the last year of high school for me. I got my report for year 11 back, some really good marks in there. My English Advanced and Ext. 1 teacher said that I need to refine my essays more and that I'm capable of band 6's and E1's. My Chem teacher, despite me being well above the average and ranked 5th in my year (50 people at my school took the course and there is a total of 175 students in my year), says I'm under achieving.

Tom

EDIT: i hate having short hair.

[pwhodges]

We interrupt this blog thread for an announcement. 

If you are running Windows, and you can see the little update shield, do it now.  This one actually matters.

Carry on...

[Slick]

GOTCHA!
After months of pretending to be a nice older guy with idiosyncratic views on how to post on a message board and charming black and white photos, it turns out, pwhodges is just a front!
Don't click the shield guys, it's a trap!

[Dimmukane]

Jens' Sister (whose name I still haven't found out), don't feel too bad.  I had SIX wisdom teeth.  I had baby ones growing in on top of my upper wisdom teeth.

[pwhodges]

Yes - my messages to this board all add up cumulatively to a subtle reprogramming of your computers.  It's revenge for the fact that only two of my wisdom teeth have grown enough to break through - what greater inadequacy can I feel?  

So why did I not simply unleash havoc without warning you?  Well, I'm nice, you see.

[Tom]

My canines quite litearlly stick from the rest of teeth, one of cousins has the exact same problem and I'll be getting braces to fix it very soon.

Jen's sister, this is a nameless 7 year old girl's dental problem:

so basically, just be glad you don't suck your thumb a lot or thrust you tongue out to much.