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Josefbugman:
Political Humour:

* Stalin's ghost appears to Putin in a dream, and Putin asks for his help running the country. Stalin says, "Round up and shoot all the democrats, and then paint the inside of the Kremlin blue." "Why blue?" Putin asks. "Ha!" says Stalin. "I knew you wouldn't ask me about the first part."

Dazed:
What's brown and sticky?

A stick.

Katherine:
What's brown and sounds like a bell?

Dung.

snalin:
This must be my favorite, I'm just going to copy/paste it from the place I found it on the internetts, looong time ago.

This is the story about Temperatures in Norway:

Temperatures

    * +15°C / 59°F

      This is as warm as it gets in Norway, so we'll start here.
      People in Spain wear winter-coats and gloves.
      The Norwegians are out in the sun, getting a tan.

    * +10°C / 50°F

      The French are trying in vain to start their central heating.
      The Norwegians plant flowers in their gardens.

    * +5°C / 41°F

      Italian cars won't start.
      The Norwegians are cruising in cabriolets.

    * 0°C / 32°F

      Distilled water freezes.
      The water in Oslo Fjord gets a little thicker.

    * -5°C / 23°F

      People in California almost freeze to death.
      The Norwegians have their final barbeque before winter.

    * -10°C / 14°F

      The Brits start the heat in their houses.
      The Norwegians start using long sleeves.

    * -20°C / -4°F

      The Aussies flee from Mallorca.
      The Norwegians end their Midsummer celebrations.
      Autumn is here.

    * -30°C / -22°F

      People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the earth.
      The Norwegians start drying their laundry indoors.

    * -40°C / -40°F

      Paris start cracking in the cold.
      The Norwegians stand in line at the hotdog stands.

    * -50°C / -58°F

      Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole.
      The Norwegian army postpones their winter survival training awaiting real winter weather.

    * -70°C / -94°F

      The false Santa moves south.
      The Norwegian army goes out on winter survival training.

    * -183°C / -297.4°F

      Microbes in food don't survive.
      The Norwegian cows complain that the farmers' hands are cold.

    * -273°C / -459.4°F

      ALL atom-based movent halts.
      The Norwegians start saying "Faen, it's cold outside today."

    * -300°C / -508°F

      Hell freezes over.
      Norway wins the Eurovision Song Contest.


If you do not know what the Eurovision Song Contest is, you have had a sad, empty life. heh, two jokes in one!

Professor Snuggles:
Ha, norway


That's not a real country!

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