jon, how do i tell the boyfriend to stop being an insecure bitch without actually saying "stop being an insecure bitch or else i will leave you forever?"
You don't.
Seriously, though, you have to come out with some of it. If you don't tell him it drives you up a wall, it will continue to drive you up a wall until the point where it all ends ugly. Don't give him a direct ultimatum, but tell him his insecurity is driving you nuts and lay it out that you're with him because you want to be, but his insecurities complicate matters. If that is somehow
not true, then you shouldn't actually be with him.
Dear Relationship Thread,
I really like a girl but she is the wrong colour and in the wrong country.
She also has a really dumb dog.
Am I gay?
Love,
Tommy
Yes.
Hey dating thread, how come guys in my town don't like me, yet when I go out of province or on the internet guys find me attractive and endearing? Occasionally very smart too when they listen. Yet I still get teased and have never been on a proper date despite having three boyfriends. Why do I keep dating crazies?
Part of the problem, honestly, from what little I know of you, is that you have acclimated yourself outside of your age range. You primarily speak online with dudes who are in their early twenties, yet you are, last I recall, sixteen or seventeen. This puts you in a position where you're associating with dudes who are at a vastly different emotional and social level than the dudes you would naturally be encountering in a dating capacity. Meanwhile, if you extend your dating pool to primarily guys in the age range of folks you talk to online, you run into the trouble of dating the kind of twenty something who would date a seventeen year old. This is going to sound harsh, and I know there's exceptions, but many guys who date girls your age at our age are guys who just aren't sufficiently socially competent enough to date a girl their own age, so they 'settle' for younger girls as they're easier to impress.
My basic advice is that your standards are probably part of your problem. Guys your age are supposed to be dumb. If you want to continue dating at your age, you should probably resolve to deal with that for the time being until you're older.
Where do I find intelligent girls? I am sick of all these clueless ladies that have no interest in the subtleties of the stock market and vector calculus. I have tried the library and had moderate success but everyone there is always like "shhh this is a library, not a dating service." If you're an intellectually attractive lady could you please give me some advice on where to search?
Oh, and I have a second problem, I really like redheads but in my experience redheads have proven to be invariably crazy. Am I just grabbing all the wrong redheads? Or do I need to ignore my love of red hair?
On the former problem, you're probably going about it wrong. Honestly, in my experience, the best place to meet smart girls who dig shit like the stock market and maths is online. Girls like that don't go to bars or scout for guys at the library.
In terms of redheads, the problem is that in many places redheads are a minority. It's not that they're less likely to be quality women, just that you're less likely to find one at all. I had a redhead thing for the longest time and Rachel's actually the first redhead I've ever been on more than one date with, mostly because there's just not a lot of them around here.
Mai's in charge for a bit, I have to go watch a baseball game between two teams I don't really care all that much about and then hang out with my girlfriend, because not hanging out with her would be poor relationship advice, guys!