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Author Topic: Out-of-Context Quotes  (Read 11655 times)

Jimor

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Out-of-Context Quotes
« on: 19 Jul 2009, 10:30 »

This thread is for quotes that you see someplace that you just have to share.

-- The idea is that you don't have to explain them, the awesomeness is just apparent. They can be funny, insightful, ironic, moronic, whatever.
-- The person doesn't have to be famous, and if they aren't you don't have to explain who they are. Internet handles are fine, but perhaps list the forum, as this can sometimes add to the flavor.
-- Edit: Quotes from elsewhere here on QC are fine, this is a good way of spreading appreciation of a fine line.

The example that inspired me to start this thread:

"Bacon! It's the candy of meat!"
  --Alex Pournelle

Have at it!  8-)
« Last Edit: 19 Jul 2009, 10:33 by Jimor »
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JD

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #1 on: 19 Jul 2009, 10:35 »

Somehow, I would figure Faye to have rather nice large nipples, while Hannelore and dora have sweet and cute small nipples.
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Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

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tommydski

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #2 on: 19 Jul 2009, 10:38 »

Cathy had a sig for literally years which made me sound like an unrepentant pederast.
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One minute we're playing Mario Kart, the next my penis is in your mouth - it just happens.

valley_parade

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #3 on: 19 Jul 2009, 10:45 »

I was watching soccer the other night, and the announcer said this when David Beckham was substituted off:

Quote
A few cheers, a few boos, a few projectiles thrown on the field. Exactly what you'd expect from Beckham.
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Wait so you're letting something that happened 10 years ago ruin your quality of life? What are you, America? :psyduck:

DarkAvenger

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #4 on: 19 Jul 2009, 10:48 »

My friend Sarah was talking about Hair (the musical) and she shouted out this gem:

Quote from: Sarah
I love Sodomy!
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scarred

Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #5 on: 19 Jul 2009, 12:52 »

Sitting around a campfire with a bunch of friends. Suddenly, the conversations lull, except for one, in which my friend ZoŽ says very loudly:

Quote from: ZoŽ
I really love cock.
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nick is a dick so you don't have to be!

Cartilage Head

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #6 on: 19 Jul 2009, 13:03 »

"Pretend you're a cowboy and lasso my cock with your vagina lips."
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JD

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #7 on: 19 Jul 2009, 13:08 »

Quote from: Some dude at the beach
I want to be a Bankrobber Pornstar
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Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

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RedLion

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #8 on: 19 Jul 2009, 13:26 »

A few choice quotes from my favorite professor

Quote
Never try to change the world.
Quote
Men belong inside of women.
Quote
Children make good prostitutes.
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Zingoleb

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #9 on: 19 Jul 2009, 18:25 »

Something I heard in the high school cafeteria a few years ago:

"I am the goddess of lesbians!" to which my friend yelled back, "I am the goddess of sodomy!"
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Hat

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #10 on: 19 Jul 2009, 18:54 »

Overheard in the smoking area at work the other day:

"She didn't even care I'd pissed myself inside of her"
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allison

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #11 on: 19 Jul 2009, 21:01 »

"It's a really good time to enter her."
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[00:30] KharBevNor: Crawling undead terrorcocks

BrittanyMarie

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #12 on: 19 Jul 2009, 23:47 »

"I didn't have time to pick him up and throw him away, so I just left him in my driveway"
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Joseph

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #13 on: 19 Jul 2009, 23:54 »

"Man, I bet restraining order sex is so hot"
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Zingoleb

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #14 on: 20 Jul 2009, 00:01 »

"I think I used too much lube."
"Don't worry, it's better that way. You'll get used to it."

(was actually talking about foosball)
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phooey

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #15 on: 20 Jul 2009, 04:29 »

Quote from: Some hilarious book dedication
To my parents, Ayn Rand and God.
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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #16 on: 20 Jul 2009, 06:39 »

"Its like bloody knuckles, with guns"
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Avec

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #17 on: 20 Jul 2009, 07:33 »

I don't know how often this is mentioned but I'll never forget when my friend said, "The way you live your life, inspires those around you."
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MadassAlex

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #18 on: 22 Jul 2009, 01:15 »

Here's one from yours truly:

"Yeah, so, killing black people? Fine by me!"

This was following a discussion with friends about Resident Evil 5. One claimed that it was racist. That is how the discussion started.
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Zingoleb

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #19 on: 22 Jul 2009, 01:26 »

Cathy had a sig for literally years which made me sound like an unrepentant pederast.

Wait, you're not?
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Blue Kitty

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #20 on: 22 Jul 2009, 19:43 »

A man came into my workplace, looked at me, and said, "Hey, you're not a petite, Asian girl"
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mberan42

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #21 on: 22 Jul 2009, 20:39 »

"My parents would be so pissed if I ruined an ecosystem!"
--Jodie, tonight.
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Liz

Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #22 on: 22 Jul 2009, 20:44 »

Matt I really do love you.

Please marry me tonight. Or tomorrow.
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Quote from: John
Liz is touching me.
Quote from: Bryan
Fuck you, I want him so bad.

Joseph

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #23 on: 22 Jul 2009, 23:38 »

If QCcon doesn't push this thread to at least three pages, I'll lose faith in everyone here.
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allison

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #24 on: 23 Jul 2009, 11:30 »

"Yeah, I just scream 'baby-lover'."
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Quote
[00:30] KharBevNor: Crawling undead terrorcocks

Mr. Doctor

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #25 on: 23 Jul 2009, 12:57 »

Overheard in the smoking area at work the other day:

"She didn't even care I'd pissed myself inside of her"

LOL... is that even possible? because last time I checked you can't piss while you're having sex. It's almsot impossible.
It's creepy.

I remember when I was like 9-10 year old and I was with my father in town. Two guys with some fancy office costumes were behind us while we were waiting the traffic light to turn green. And just before people started to walk I listened to one of the elegant guys saying this in such an elegant way:

"I swear dude I fucked her so HAAAAARD!!!!"
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BeoPuppy

Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #26 on: 24 Jul 2009, 05:24 »

'I couldn't possibly take that it's way too big!'







(Colleagues talking about the impossibilities of transporting Zucchini's on bike fromHeerhugowaard to Amsterdam).
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Liz

Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #27 on: 24 Jul 2009, 16:29 »

"He does like it in his eyes."
- Jodie (in reference to Jens)

"None of the tattoo men would touch my penis for less than $200."
- Old man in thrift store (crazy?)

"It's too big, he can't fit it in his mouth."
- Me!
« Last Edit: 24 Jul 2009, 16:41 by Misconception »
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Quote from: John
Liz is touching me.
Quote from: Bryan
Fuck you, I want him so bad.

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #28 on: 24 Jul 2009, 16:37 »

Liz's current sig:
Quote from: Darryl
I think we're about 10 years away from really, really convincing fake dicks

Is an out of context quote. It's better in context. We were discussing the intricasies of phalloplasties for transmen. Ten years from now you will be able to get a fully functioning dick and only people who take a really close look will know it's the result of surgery. Of this I am certain. You won't be able to come all over somebody's face though, unfortunately. Babysteps, y'know?
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Reed

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #29 on: 24 Jul 2009, 16:52 »

Darryl, we just want to hear about the dicks, not their explanations!
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[22:49] Quietus: I'm personally imagining a white supremacist locked in his basement, furtively listening to Parliament on headphones
[22:49] Quietus: "Oh, lawd, why must them coons rock me so"

David_Dovey

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #30 on: 24 Jul 2009, 16:55 »

Wait so will you be able to come all over other places, aside from the face? What the tits? The small of the back? The stomach? The dog?
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tinysmidgen

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #31 on: 24 Jul 2009, 17:07 »

At work:
Coworker: "I swear to god I've seen that chick and that dog in a porno/"
Me: "Were they in a scene together?"
Coworker: "No, it was like the girl was dropping the dog off at this dance recital and the dance recital turned into some hardcore orgy."
Me: "Ah"
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Liz

Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #32 on: 24 Jul 2009, 23:48 »

"I think I'm going to crawl into that bed now"
"I think I'll join you."
- Oli/Jon
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Quote from: John
Liz is touching me.
Quote from: Bryan
Fuck you, I want him so bad.

Liz

Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #33 on: 24 Jul 2009, 23:53 »

Addendum:

"If I spoon you in the night..."
- Oli
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Quote from: John
Liz is touching me.
Quote from: Bryan
Fuck you, I want him so bad.

est

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #34 on: 25 Jul 2009, 00:28 »

"Punching's so much fun"
- part of a song from a kid's show called Romper Room
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David_Dovey

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #35 on: 25 Jul 2009, 00:32 »

Holy crap I loved Romper Room!

I used to have a Romper Room game on Commodore 64.
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It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

Inlander

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #36 on: 26 Jul 2009, 08:13 »

That song sounds more like Romper Stomper Room.
« Last Edit: 26 Jul 2009, 08:14 by Inlander »
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kemon

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #37 on: 26 Jul 2009, 15:24 »

Quote
Next patch it's going to be wonderful with the changes to Bacon.
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allison

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #38 on: 26 Jul 2009, 18:01 »

"Every young lady should have a pearl necklace."
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Quote
[00:30] KharBevNor: Crawling undead terrorcocks

Liz

Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #39 on: 26 Jul 2009, 18:42 »

"I don't want to lick the man's crotch."
- Jens

"Do you have the strap on?"
- Liz

"Maybe Oli got off."
- Liz
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Quote from: John
Liz is touching me.
Quote from: Bryan
Fuck you, I want him so bad.

nobo

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #40 on: 26 Jul 2009, 18:42 »

"with the feathers and elmer's glue you can make your wang look like a peacock"
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Well yes but (sorry andy) she doesn't look half as fucking bad ass as this motherfucker in Poland.

Dude is hardcore.

Malek

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #41 on: 26 Jul 2009, 20:29 »

"I dont care who the hell you are. If'n you come near my house and land again,i will shoot you with this here shooty thing"

This was said by the people liveing next door to me.
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Zingoleb

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #42 on: 26 Jul 2009, 21:10 »

"He tried to fuck the furry but it was actually a bear."

- My father, earlier tonight.
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JD

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #43 on: 26 Jul 2009, 21:15 »

"with the feathers and elmer's glue you can make your wang look like a peacock"

I would prefer Elmer's to super glue.
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Quote from: Jimmy the Squid
Hey JD, I really like your penis, man.

Mein Tumblr

allison

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #44 on: 27 Jul 2009, 08:03 »

"You feel like Anne Frank. Let's talk about this."
"I'd say this summer has been very much like the Holocaust."
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Quote
[00:30] KharBevNor: Crawling undead terrorcocks

Scandanavian War Machine

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #45 on: 27 Jul 2009, 10:56 »

"I have a penis and balls, I don't give a fuck!"
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Also I would like to point out that the combination of Sailor Moon and faux-Kerouac / Sonic Youth spelling is perhaps the purest distillation of what this forum is that we have yet been presented with.

MrBlu

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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #46 on: 27 Jul 2009, 11:29 »

"Every young lady should have a pearl necklace."
Not so much out of context as possibly a double entendre.
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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #47 on: 27 Jul 2009, 20:14 »

Quote from: Jeremy Clarkson on Top Gear
They feel like testes! Big, meaty ones!

I've heard several others that I thought at the time would be great for this thread, but then I always forget before I get back on the computer.
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Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #48 on: 28 Jul 2009, 11:33 »

This isn't my quote, but...

"Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis"

Yeeeeaah  :laugh:
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scarred

Re: Out-of-Context Quotes
« Reply #49 on: 28 Jul 2009, 15:36 »

"Oh, it's a white baby!"

During my photoshop class.
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