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Faye catches Marigold reading Slash

2 (2.4%)

Tai WROTE "Quidditch Field Idyll"

3 (3.7%)

WILL YOU SIGN MY NETBOOK

4 (4.9%)

"It's really good though!"

0 (0%)

Wanna come to dinner?

1 (1.2%)

Marigold has no idea, does she?

24 (29.3%)

Novel Euphemism

10 (12.2%)

It's got lots of potential!

0 (0%)

B-but yea, TONS of potential!

4 (4.9%)

You have to show people WHY it's sexy.

4 (4.9%)

Ron... and SNAPE...

16 (19.5%)

I give up.

14 (17.1%)

Total Members Voted: 70

[raoullefere]

What have they done to my thread????  

I don't know, but were I you, I'd've tried to pretend I hadn't started it.

Of all the things we need on the interwebs, more 'inevitable clefts' aren't, I feel, amongst them.

"He traced his finger down to the inevitable cleft of his palate . . ."

Now, see, this is exactly the sort of thing I'm talking about. Ye gods, it even has a potentially catchy name: the "Inevitable" Meme.

Civilization is…well, it's even more doomed.

[Akima]

"He traced his finger down to the inevitable cleft of his palate . . ."

"The plumber crouched under my sink, his sagging jeans exposing the inevitable cleft of his pallid, hairy buttocks."

[Near Lurker]

Ron... and Snape...?

...ew.

Wait, T. Rex?  Wouldn't the T. Rex school of erotic fiction be more like "and Ron was his two-penny prince and he gave him hot love, oh-oh-oh"?

[akronnick]

If Tai were to make a move right now, it would probably be successful.





But I don't think Tai wants to go there anymore...

[iduguphergrave]

Nothing like bad erotic fanfic for killing your (figurative) boner.

Good god, Marigold, take a creative writing course!

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

MARIGOLD YOUR POOR CHOICE IN SHIPPING IS RUINING THE POTENTIAL SAPPHIC GOODNESS D:<

...as is your apparent inability to put what is happening in your mind to paper, I mean dang. I don't know if even Tai's pimp hand is up to this.

[Akima]

Ron and Snape... OK, Jeph is just winding us up now! Not of course that any of us would engage in bizarre shipping like that. Or come up with portmanteau couple-names like Snon or Ra- Lord Buddha, no!

[Heliphyneau]

Of all the things we need on the interwebs, more 'inevitable clefts' aren't, I feel, amongst them.

"He traced his finger down to the inevitable cleft of his palate . . ."

Now, see, this is exactly the sort of thing I'm talking about. Ye gods, it even has a potentially catchy name: the "Inevitable" Meme.

Civilization is…well, it's even more doomed.

"He traced his finger down to the inevitable cleft of his palate . . ."

"The plumber crouched under my sink, his sagging jeans exposing the inevitable cleft of his pallid, hairy buttocks."

Mwahaha -- well, what's the point of writing if not to stab people in the brain?  Brains have inevitable clefts too . . .  So, three cheers for the doom of civilization!   

Ron and Snape... OK, Jeph is just winding us up now! Not of course that any of us would engage in bizarre shipping like that. Or come up with portmanteau couple-names like Snon or Ra- Lord Buddha, no!

Oh man -- thank you for that actual LOL (surprised my husband hasn't run in here to ask what I'm cackling about).  Well done!

And maybe the T. Rex referred to in "The T. Rex School of Erotic Fiction" is actually this guy:   

[Nodaisho]

"I can take it if it sucks, ..."

No. You cant. Nobody can. I thought the same and I couldnt either.

Being told one sucks at writing is hard to take, no matter how many illusions one had one could take it.

No matter how much talent someone has at writing, they need a lot of practice. Rough drafts are always bad. If you look at the more accomplished authors, their rough drafts (if you can find them, which you normally can't) look more like second or third drafts from other people, but they still need work, and those authors have written tens of millions of words. It is a lot of work to write something good. We only see the finished copy, so we don't realize that. Expect to write at least 10 times as much as eventually is in the final item, if not more.

I have never really understood shipping like that. I can see thinking "Man, I wish ___ and ___ stayed together and had more awesome adventures." But "I wish ___ and ___ had sex a lot?" Where do you get that?

[Skewbrow]

So Tai has found that her calling is to teach creative writing at junior high school. And Marigold embarks on a new career of writing lyrics for Sven's new genre of music: Country&Western for otaku aka YeehawYaoi.

[IlGreven]

...eh, just teach Marigold the other way. She'll be like Peter Chimaera, only with slashfic.

Atuhors Nose: Uncycylopedia (which is online encyclopidia like wikiped) said I was writing story called Quartergasm: Halfway to Climax and dontn't know where come but I decide to write anyway.

[iduguphergrave]

And Marigold embarks on a new career of writing lyrics for Sven's new genre of music: Country&Western for otaku aka YeehawYaoi.

If I could actually stand country music I would kind of want this.


Like, really  want it.



...

[Kugai]

Actually, with a bit more patience, she could teach Marigold.

[Near Lurker]

And Marigold embarks on a new career of writing lyrics for Sven's new genre of music: Country&Western for otaku aka YeehawYaoi.

If I could actually stand country music I would kind of want this.


Like, really  want it.



...

It has to exist.  I know it does.

...well, there's always Willie Nelson's "Cowboys Are Frequently Secretly Fond of Each Other."

[ecstaticjoy]

Actually, with a bit more patience, she could teach Marigold.

mmmm hmmm 

[cuzsis]

"I can take it if it sucks, ..."

No. You cant. Nobody can. I thought the same and I couldnt either.

Being told one sucks at writing is hard to take, no matter how many illusions one had one could take it.

No matter how much talent someone has at writing, they need a lot of practice. Rough drafts are always bad. If you look at the more accomplished authors, their rough drafts (if you can find them, which you normally can't) look more like second or third drafts from other people, but they still need work, and those authors have written tens of millions of words. It is a lot of work to write something good. We only see the finished copy, so we don't realize that. Expect to write at least 10 times as much as eventually is in the final item, if not more.

I have never really understood shipping like that. I can see thinking "Man, I wish ___ and ___ stayed together and had more awesome adventures." But "I wish ___ and ___ had sex a lot?" Where do you get that?

 No idea.

 Self insertion maybe? 

[Nodaisho]

That must take a lot of flexibility.

[laizeohbeets]

Ron and Snape? I'm sure someone out there ships it, but it's not got a super-huge following. Now, Snarry on the other hand...

[Carl-E]

Good god, people - I'm gone for two days, and have to spend the third reading the WCDT?!?

And it wasn't really worth it...

Reiver, another beer here!  If I'm gong to watch this, I haven't had nearly enough. 

The week is over, but is this arc? 

[Exar_Kun]

I'm kind of surprised Marigold hasn't picked up at least a few pointers in writing erotic fiction from all that yaoi she reads. I mean I can assume Tai picked up her skill for it from reading Jimbo's work.

EDIT: Looks like Marigold needs some writing lessons from Jimbo?

[Sorflakne]

I just want to say that I'm going to have nightmares after reading today's (Friday) comic, and that I really should not read new QC comics before going to bed.

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

Actually, with a bit more patience, she could teach Marigold.

Marigold could learn by doing (IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN)

(...yes I am fully aware she would have to write femslash instead for that to make sense properly but hush)

Ron and Snape... OK, Jeph is just winding us up now! Not of course that any of us would engage in bizarre shipping like that. Or come up with portmanteau couple-names like Snon or Ra- Lord Buddha, no!

HA!

...Y'know, tying this to earlier in the thread, that means that Marigold, not Tai, is a Rapi--

...But it's funny, see, cause she likes--

...I'll get my coat.

[squishything]

Hahaha, way to pre-emptively kill the mood Mar.

Yahoo Yaoi must be made. It will be deliciously sexy and postmodern.

Until then, have this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lj0yaxVCU6I

[steveh11]

Yes, a lot of fanfiction, and for some reason it seems a lot of HP fanfiction especially, seems to be poorly written slash.

Though, in fairness, there's quite a lot of poorly written Buffy femslash, too.

[Arky]

Geez, last two strips have brought it all flooding back how ANNOYING the Marigold character is in large doses (yes, I was a bit down on QC for a while during the long interrgnum where it seemed QC was the Marigold Show and even Fangus was just there for Marigold's greater character development. I mean, Raven died so that Marigold may have more screentime folks- Jeph SAYS she's at school, but we all know the truth!   Although it was all kind of worth it for the Momo/Sven strip...).

[snubnose]

Todays comic is weird.

Nuff said.

[Mr_Rose]

Although it was all kind of worth it for the Momo/Sven strip...).

Wait, they stripped? Was this on Jeph's Tumblr?

[Border Reiver]

Carl, I'm switching to scotch for the forum - and given Akima's reaction she'll be joining us.  Car keys are to be put into the jar on the counter, there are extra blankets and pillows in the closet.

Apparently Marigold slept through the English class where they discussed the "show, don't tell" principle of story telling.  That and she has an "active" imagination.  It would also appear that Mar's "erotic fan-fic" has killed Tai's libido, or at least caused it to go whimper in the corner and ask the bad man to stop.

[Mad Cat]

Ron... and Snape...

Thus is a new `ship launched.

And why does it bug me so much when some guy is all up like

Hurr, hurr. She lost her boner. But she couldn't really lose her boner, because she's a girl and so she doesn't have a penis, hence she cannot get a boner, so she didn't lose her real boner. She lost her figurative boner. Herp. Derp.

?

I think it's because it betrays an ignorance of anatomy that makes me fearful for the climax of any female he manages to get with. Besides which, if Tai wants to have a cock, she can damn well have one.

[akronnick]

You don't need a cock to have a boner. 

[innermoppet]

Marigold's fanfic sounds awful and also sounds like 75% of the fanfic I've read. It's not unusually awful. It's typically awful. What is unusual is the people who write so badly are usually fifteen years old and don't know any better. That shows how naive and unschooled Marigold is with regards to love and sex.

Ron... and Snape...

Thus is a new `ship launched.

It's so cute that you think that's a new ship.

Snape/Anyone is extremely popular and was long before he was outed as a good guy. In the realms of fandom, there are no new ships. No matter how pervy, illegal or just plain despicable, it's been written and then fantasized about. I once started reading a fic about zombie necrophilia incest rape with BDSM where Lucius Malfoy forced Draco to do disgusing things to his dead (as written) mother.. I did not finish reading that one because I was too busy vomiting.

Fred/George fic was also popular (they charmingly call that twin-cest).

Fandom means never having to say you're sorry for your sick f***ing mind.

[Skewbrow]

And Marigold embarks on a new career of writing lyrics for Sven's new genre of music: Country&Western for otaku aka YeehawYaoi.

If I could actually stand country music I would kind of want this.

Like, really  want it.

It has to exist.  I know it does.

...well, there's always Willie Nelson's "Cowboys Are Frequently Secretly Fond of Each Other."

So they would get to do the soundtracks to all the umpteen anime versions of Brokeback Mountain?

[jwhouk]

Just how bad IS Marigold's Slashfic?

Makes Jimbo look like Tolstoy.    - 16 (19.3%)
Makes Erica Jong look like Dickens.    - 2 (2.4%)
Is the literarly equivalent of the Sex Pistols.    - 10 (12%)
So bad it's mediocre.    - 12 (14.5%)
So bad it's bad.    - 2 (2.4%)
Bad enough that even Pintsize doesn't like it.    - 20 (24.1%)
Oh, just GOOGLE it.    - 15 (18.1%)
What? You haven't bought QC Volume 1 yet? SHAME on YOU!    - 6 (7.2%)

Total Voters: 83

[maddness]

I once started reading a fic about zombie necrophilia incest rape with BDSM where Lucius Malfoy forced Draco to do disgusing things to his dead (as written) mother.. I did not finish reading that one because I was too busy vomiting.

And still not as sick as the Lucius/Draco snuff slash that Topless Robot sprang on me one Fan Fiction Friday involving incestuous necrophilia, scat and skull fucking.

I mostly try to stay away from Fan Fiction Friday because it's always icky, but I would still occasionally check it out until I saw that one. That one was the deal breaker for me. I haven't read a Fan Fiction Friday since then.

[Dliessmgg]

...well, there's always Willie Nelson's "Cowboys Are Frequently Secretly Fond of Each Other."

Rewrite it into "Cowboys Frequently Secretly Fondle Each Other".

[Prince of Space]

I used to write fanfic back in the day (bad, out of character fanfics...but I'll toot my own horn on grammar and word flow).  I was about 14 when I started.

I was also about as nerdy/anti-social/anxiety ridden as they come (think 'almost' Marigold). 

Yet even I knew that you couldn't just write 'and it was sexy' at the end of something.  How old is Marigold, again?  Did she graduate high-school?  Who, past the age of 16, thinks you can write like that?   Honestly, I still know some people who write fanfics (even in their 20's) and none of them would think this sounded legit.

I think I'm mostly sad because I wanted to like Marigold, but this kind of paints her as a fangirl idiot (idiot being the key word here).  And you know what?  That would be fine...if she were in her teens. 

Edit: And is anyone else tired of the 'nutsack-hamster face' the characters keep making?  :3 <------nutsack

[fifthfiend]

Nothing borings up Potter-porn like a bunch of fuckin' words.

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

I once started reading a fic about zombie necrophilia incest rape with BDSM where Lucius Malfoy forced Draco to do disgusing things to his dead (as written) mother.. I did not finish reading that one because I was too busy vomiting.

And still not as sick as the Lucius/Draco snuff slash that Topless Robot sprang on me one Fan Fiction Friday involving incestuous necrophilia, scat and skull fucking.

I mostly try to stay away from Fan Fiction Friday because it's always icky, but I would still occasionally check it out until I saw that one. That one was the deal breaker for me. I haven't read a Fan Fiction Friday since then.

...That is, in fact, actually worse than the Dumbledore/Snape/Harry mess that ended up being I discovered the meaning of the term "mpreg".

......I was much happier with my life before I knew the meaning of the term "mpreg." Thank you, Harry Potter fans! (Also thank you, too, morbid curiosity)

I used to write fanfic back in the day (bad, out of character fanfics...but I'll toot my own horn on grammar and word flow).  I was about 14 when I started.

I was also about as nerdy/anti-social/anxiety ridden as they come (think 'almost' Marigold).  

Yet even I knew that you couldn't just write 'and it was sexy' at the end of something.  How old is Marigold, again?  Did she graduate high-school?  Who, past the age of 16, thinks you can write like that?   Honestly, I still know some people who write fanfics (even in their 20's) and none of them would think this sounded legit.

I think I'm mostly sad because I wanted to like Marigold, but this kind of paints her as a fangirl idiot (idiot being the key word here).  And you know what?  That would be fine...if she were in her teens.  

Edit: And is anyone else tired of the 'nutsack-hamster face' the characters keep making?  :3 <------nutsack

You can like someone despite their being a fangirl idiot.

And some people just fuckin' do not know how to write. I have edited for these people--I know. You tell them things, they go and "work on it", they come back with the same shit in a different order with maybe a few small tweaks or more detail here and there. Whatever the problem was, though? Is still there. These people graduated high school with 3.5s at the lowest, and are in their 20s, and they just do not have the chops to do the writing thing, especially not creatively.

If Marigirl actually does have potential, and Tai wasn't just sparing her feelings, I think the problem is she probably has trouble describing action. She sees it in her head just fine, and in her head it's playing out, so she assumes the reader knows what she's thinking. She also is not writing something she knows anything about beyond Internet sources, and those ain't necessarily good.

She may be very good with dialogue and setting! She may even be good at coming up with plot for the characters! ...but she may need a creative writing class like right fucking now.

[Border Reiver]

On a different note - anyone else notice that Tai's been in Dora's closet?

The evidence is here.  Time to arrest the miscreant and throw her in prison. 

Then we can get the "Girls in Prison" arc going - you can thank me for the mental images later.

[raoullefere]

Marigold could learn by doing (IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN)

You're being funny, but I do suspect this is at least part of the problem, the other being that all Marigold reads seems to be comics, where such things are mostly handled by the illustrations, and fanfic, some of is likely on the same level as Marigold's piece. My compliments to Tai for trying, but Marigold's response indicates Tai's likely fighting an uphill battle. In torrential rain, amidst a mudslide.

On a side note, I know it isn't Jeph's style, but yesterday I kept thinking how the googly-eyed poster that replaced the window ought to be rolling its eyes in the last panel, and today, the happy green-haired girl out to be weeping in the last one. Too much Breathed in my past, I guess.

[foolsguinea]

Marigold. She's hopeless. Oy.

[Border Reiver]

Too much Breathed in my past, I guess.

There can never be too much Bloom County.  Even here.

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

Marigold could learn by doing (IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN)

You're being funny, but I do suspect this is at least part of the problem, the other being that all Marigold reads seems to be comics, where such things are mostly handled by the illustrations, and fanfic, some of is likely on the same level as Marigold's piece. My compliments to Tai for trying, but Marigold's response indicates Tai's likely fighting an uphill battle. In torrential rain, amidst a mudslide.

On a side note, I know it isn't Jeph's style, but yesterday I kept thinking how the googly-eyed poster that replaced the window ought to be rolling its eyes in the last panel, and today, the happy green-haired girl out to be weeping in the last one. Too much Breathed in my past, I guess.

I actually wholeheartedly agree that some of Marigold's problems stem from not knowing what the hell she's talking about, and not having good examples to work from. The girl needs to read some good writing, and, well, have some experiences. Hell, I think Marigold would benefit from life experience in general. The girl is heartbreaking, because she's clearly been bullied into basically inverting on herself and never interacting with people except through the Internet.

And true to life, she is, I think, a really good, worthwhile person. I like Marigold. But she's got deficiencies.

Which is why I've come to really want Tai and Marigold to just fuckin' go for it. Marigold needs to take more chances/have more opportunities presented to her, and even if they turn out bad, like Angus, then at least she's had the experience, and she can get through the Life Lesson and move on.

Finally: Reiver is correct, Bloom County is something there can NEVER be too much of.

[Aggie]

Monday's comic: 3 panels of Tai making a move on Marigold by getting her hot and bothered describing the scene as she would write it, with a fourth panel of Yelling Bird saying, "AND THEN TAI AND MARIGOLD HAD SEX."

[Near Lurker]

No, it'll be,

Tai: "Wow, you just... I'm really sorry, but I don't think I can do this.  Don't take this the wrong way, but going through this much bad lime... I'm leaving now."
Marigold: "Okay.  See you."
(Tai leaves.)
Marigold: "Wait..."

[Nightson]

In monday's strip the first three panels will be shots of two people having sex, the details in the panels will show it must be Tai and Marigold. 

Then the camera will pan in the fourth strip to show that they're watching Yaoi on Mari's computer.

[Prince of Space]

You can like someone despite their being a fangirl idiot.

And some people just fuckin' do not know how to write. I have edited for these people--I know. You tell them things, they go and "work on it", they come back with the same shit in a different order with maybe a few small tweaks or more detail here and there. Whatever the problem was, though? Is still there. These people graduated high school with 3.5s at the lowest, and are in their 20s, and they just do not have the chops to do the writing thing, especially not creatively.

I guess the type of idiot(who happens to be a fangirl) I'm thinking of is this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-crjyRhRkA

Bet you can't get through the whole video without wanting to punch someone in the face (I sure couldn't).

But Marigold hasn't done any of that yet, so I guess I jumped the gun a little by assuming.  Let's hope she'll take some constructive criticism and get better.  Otherwise, she will be the type of idiot I don't like. And then I'll be sad.

[Is it cold in here?]

Yet even I knew that you couldn't just write 'and it was sexy' at the end of something.  How old is Marigold, again?  Did she graduate high-school?  Who, past the age of 16, thinks you can write like that?   Honestly, I still know some people who write fanfics (even in their 20's) and none of them would think this sounded legit.

Some things are most easily explained by the hypothesis that it's just a fictional comedy with things exaggerated for comic effect. However, this explanation is too boring for us to accept it just because it's true.

[Dliessmgg]

I guess the type of idiot(who happens to be a fangirl) I'm thinking of is this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-crjyRhRkA

Bet you can't get through the whole video (I sure couldn't).

fyp 

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

You can like someone despite their being a fangirl idiot.

And some people just fuckin' do not know how to write. I have edited for these people--I know. You tell them things, they go and "work on it", they come back with the same shit in a different order with maybe a few small tweaks or more detail here and there. Whatever the problem was, though? Is still there. These people graduated high school with 3.5s at the lowest, and are in their 20s, and they just do not have the chops to do the writing thing, especially not creatively.

I guess the type of idiot(who happens to be a fangirl) I'm thinking of is this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-crjyRhRkA

Bet you can't get through the whole video without wanting to punch someone in the face (I sure couldn't).

But Marigold hasn't done any of that yet, so I guess I jumped the gun a little by assuming.  Let's hope she'll take some constructive criticism and get better.  Otherwise, she will be the type of idiot I don't like. And then I'll be sad.

...The problem I see in this video is someone who does not know when to stop and/or shut the fucking fuck up, which Marigold...doesn't come off as. She seems more like a troubled chick with a very strong fantasy life and a looooooooot of introversion. (And if the anime thing bothers you, that's a matter of opinion; I'm also biased, since my wife has loved everything Japanese-culture since long ago, and I confess I like it all right myself.)

From what we've seen of Mar-bear, she's afraid to even try...

...which ALSO may be reflected in her writing. I mean, it could be that she wants to write some smut, but she has no experience and she's embarrassed, unconsciously.