Comic Discussion > QUESTIONABLE CONTENT
Why does Dora need therapy?
stoutfiles:
--- Quote from: Blackjoker on 13 Jun 2011, 15:46 ---
1) People have been willing to post links showing rebuttals to your assertions, you seem to have either ignored them or you disagree, fine. But why not offer a few counter arguments for your own position, I am willing to change my view in light of new information and perspectives.
2) Yes, they are Doras decisions to make, but that doesn't mean that people who care about her should be ignored or treated as bad because they try to offer help and advice. Dora also offered plenty of advice to Faye in the strip as well, would you call that being a bad person or friend to her?
3) Their friendship may be rather acidic but it is there. The second thing is that you're hyperbolizing what was said and jumping to an odd conclusion. Faye might just be saying that Jim seems a bit off to her, it might be a bit like her faulty threat detection in earlier strips where she was even afraid of Marten in some regards (and in these cases Dora called her out on it and confronted the issues).
4) Alone forever, maybe maybe not. However it is worth noting that she even realized that her decisions were irrational in the relationship if she was given enough time to think about it. And according to both her and Sven her earlier boyfriends were abusers, maybe just emotional maybe also physical but they were still abusers. Dora might not end up 'forever alone' if she doesn't deal with her issues but she might find herself either in another abusive relationship or flying off the handle one time too often to the point where her friends decide that they have frankly had enough.
5) It's also important to note that Dora had to push Faye a fair amount to help get her into therapy, more to the point so did Marten, would you say that they were being bad friends for doing that? Faye wasn't crying constantly either, she was able to work just fine and had friends, would you say that the therapy for her was unnecessary?
--- End quote ---
1) http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=1395
Dora admits that they don't have much in common.
2) There is a time and place. Not at work in front of people, and not over and over. Faye has made her point already, Dora seems to be rejecting it. If Faye keeps pushing therapy it will only strain their friendship.
3) They just fight a lot lately, but yes, I agree they are still good friends. I don't think Faye should be judging people on their forwardness given that Angus was basically a huge creeper when he first appeared.
4) If her friends deserted her she would be more motivated to get help. Although, it'd be pretty hard for them to do that since she employs half of them. Their just isn't a lot of motivation to get help right now, everything in her life is getting back on track. Only in a downward spiral will she want to get help.
5) There's a difference between a soft push and a forceful push. The way Faye is doing it is coming off as naggy and bossy, and isn't the right way to go about it. She should also wait till after work.
JordanDH:
--- Quote from: stoutfiles on 12 Jun 2011, 21:51 ---Once again, Faye is trying to drag Dora down. Jim is now declared a creeper (Angus was the definition of creeper when he was introduced) and Dora needs to not date and get help. When did Faye become an expert on these things? I mean, her life is so great and on the fast track to success! So naturally she knows everything! It's as if she wants Dora to get help to feel better about herself needing help.
Good for your Dora. Jim is different from your manatee ex-boyfriend and fits you much better. Stop taking advice from all your troubled coworkers!
--- End quote ---
She is the expert on not dating and getting help. She didn't date Marten and got help. And as a result of that she's now in a pretty healthy relationship. Anyone in the comic who commented on the relationship said how well they worked together. Also, being troubled doesn't make someone braindead. Some people don't take their own good advice. Other than professionally, how is Dora successful? Dora admitted to needing help. I think that's everything.
Spectreofwar:
--- Quote from: stoutfiles on 13 Jun 2011, 18:50 ---1) http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1395
Dora admits that they don't have much in common.
--- End quote ---
Stoutfiles, you are seriously reaching.
She said that ONE aspect of Marten, which is a sizeable portion of him, is one she'll never be able to have a conversation with him about, and even if she did it'd be a girlfriend one.
How on EARTH did you take that to mean, and I quote, "they don't have much in common"? Face it, you're projecting, and at this point doing a poor job of it. If you have issues with Marten, just say it, but now you're just grasping at straws.
What really is your problem with this angle of the strip? What about Dora puts you so zealously on her "side" of things?
P.S. Link works now.
tomart:
Spectre, I think the Original Post offers a clue:
--- Quote from: stoutfiles on 09 Jun 2011, 15:54 ---I've not convinced she was happy with Marten; therefore, she created situations in her mind to get mad at him. Dora's a young, successful business woman. Marten is a flaky librarian assistant with no ambition to do anything. Once the initial attraction wore off, I wouldn't put it past Dora to wonder why she was even dating someone who didn't have the same drive as her. Marten is...well....kind of a loser when you look at the big picture. So Dora breaks up with him, with hardly any emotion towards it, and now she needs to get help? I think not.
Dora, you're perfectly fine. Date someone that's more your type and it'll work out fine.
--- End quote ---
Dora is a successful business woman; Marten is a flaky loser with no ambition. By these definitions, they do have little in common besides good sex, and that fades.
If this were an Ayn Rand novel, we'd be bulldozed with Dora's healthy life-affirming positive qualities and business successes, while Manatee boy would be a plot device to show human stagnation and failure. He'd be in therapy, or put on a bus, but Dora? Never! She's the success=hero and can do no wrong!
Except that in Questionable Content, Marten is our (anti?) hero. For him, success = supporting himself and fun with friends. A whole different, relaxed kettle of beer.
I agree, Dora was (unconsciously?) creating problems, perhaps aware she had made a mistake THAT MARTEN WOULDN'T EVEN SEE AS A MISTAKE. So how to end it?
Lots of human mistakes are never admitted, even (especially!) to oneself, just ways are found to "fix" (avoid, walk away from) the problems...
Perhaps this is why she ended it with no real explanation to Marten; he wouldn't have understoob.
edit: he wouldn't have understood "Lack of Ambition" as a reason to leave someone.
TRVA123:
Thank god this isn't an Ayn Rand novel, her characters don't talk to each other so much as monologue at each other.
I think Marten would understand where Dora's problems in the relationship are coming from, it's just that there's nothing he could do about her insecurities that he wasn't doing already. He'd have to go to ridiculous lengths to avoid any other women, discuss every new cosmetic decision he makes with Dora ahead of time, never mention/have feelings or attractions for any other women, and give up all privacy rights. This list is a bit absurd, and I don't think Dora is that bad consistently, but they have had fights based on all of these things.
Dora needs to learn to trust those around her. Part of dating someone is to trust that they won't violate the terms of your relationship, even if you're not there to keep an eye on them. esp if you're dating someone with an active social life, if you didn't just sit back and trust them you might drive yourself crazy.
I don't think dating someone else will change Dora's ability to trust her partner. Unless she dates a shut in with no other friends. She will have to work on her trust issues before she can have a successful relationship. Or a good vacation, for that matter, does she trust anyone to run CoD while she goes away for a week or two/
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