I like you guys, you have a certain je ne sais quoi. I'm gonna let you in on a secret, my own personally proven and patented method for hangover-halting, post-haste! It's a nifty trick that those who know it refer to as "The Triple H Formula". The Triple H Formula is a tripartite method guaranteed to bring you back to 100% effectiveness, fact! Here's what you do:
1: Wake up (This is crucial)
2: Stumble to the nearest water-dispensing receptacle
3: Imbibe yourself on copious amounts of the First H- H20.
4: Shuffle yourself over to a freezer
5: Retrieve from the icy confines the Second H- Hot Pockets.
6: Microwave that greasy goodness for the appropriate amount of time. 2 minutes for one, 3.5 for two
7: While waiting, imbibe further on the First H. Drinking got you into this mess, and it'll get you out of it.
8: Allow your Hot Pockets time to cool, burned mouths are an amateur mistake.
9: Imbibe once more, downing water and C-grade meats with voraciousness. This is no time for dignity, you gave that up last night.
10: Embrace the Third H- the all-cleaning divinity of a hot shower. Feel the accumulated beer sweat and Hot Pocket grease wash away, cleansing your body and mind of the sins of the past 12 hours. Emerge from the steam reborn, like a Phoenix of old. You are now ready to conquer the day.