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Musician jokes!

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confusedcious:
While out on a hunting expedition a man is climbing over a fallen tree when his shotgun goes off, hitting him straight in the groin.
Rushed to hospital, he awakes from the anaesthetic to find the surgeon has done a marvellous job repairing his damaged member. As he dresses to go home the surgeon wanders over and hands him a business card.
'This is my brother's card. I'll make an appointment for you to see him.'
The man is shocked. 'But it says here that he's a professional flute player. How can he help me?'
The doctor smiles, 'Well, he's going to show you where to put your fingers so you don't piss in your eye.'

Q: Why was the piano invented?
A: So the singer would have somewhere to put her beer.

Q: How can you tell if there's a synth player at your door?
A: You hear a knock, but you can't tell if it's real or not.

Q: How many flautists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One, but she'll twist it back and forth for an hour until she gets it just right.

Q: Why is playing an english horn solo like wetting your pants?
A: Both give you a warm feeling but nobody cares.

Q: What's the difference between a clarinet and an onion?
A: Nobody cries if you chop up a clarinet.

Q: Why do trumpet players only use one hand to play their instruments?
A: The other one is busy

I could continue but this could take weeks ^.^;;

KharBevNor:
Off-topic, but ZOMG HELLSINGPUFFS.

^_^ squeeeeeeee

Shaft:

--- Quote from: Rubby ---
--- Quote from: Bastardous Bassist ---
whereas C and Eb make a minor third.
--- End quote ---

Or just a plain old minor since the deffinition of a minor is a minor third or flattened third.
edit: and as far as what I said before. I wasn't thinking of D# in relation to C, but as it's own scale. So in that case it would have to be D#m, but I should have gotten it because C and G have a fifth between them thing.
--- End quote ---


Actually, if you're talking scales, you need a flattened 3rd, 6th and 7th. Next person to mention melodic and harmonic minors gets a slap.

The flautist joke is cool.

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