A jazz player was hired to play with a symphony orchestra. The first
movement was fine as there were some really hairy solo's. However, during the second movement the jazzer started improvising furiously. After the concert the conductor asked what all the impro' stuff was about. 'well man the score said 'tacit', so I took it.
Q: "What do you call a drummer with half a brain?"
A: "Gifted".
A guy walks into a shop.
"You got one of them Marshall Hiwatt AC30 amplificatior thingies and a
Gobson StratoBlaster geetar with a Fried Rose tremulo?"
"You're a drummer, aren't you?"
"Duh, yeah. How'd you know?"
"This is a travel agency."
Q: What's the last thing a drummer says in a band?
A: "Hey, guys - why don't we try one of my songs? ..."
Q: Why to bands need Roadies?
A: To translate what the drummer says.
Q: "What was the epitaph on the blues players gravestone?"
A: "I didn't wake up this morning".
Q: What kind of diary does a piano accordion player have ?
A: A year a page.
Q:What did the drummer get on his I.Q. test?
A:Drool
Q: What's black and blue and laying in a ditch?
A: A guitarist who's told too many drummer jokes.
Q: Why do drummers leave their drum sticks on the dashboard of their car?
A: So they can park in the disabled carpar
Q: Why are so many guitarists jokes one liners?
A: So the rest of the band can understand them.
Q: What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A: A drummer.
A Customer walks into a new shop on his street that sell brains.There are three glass cases,each containing a kilos worth of nice wet quivering grey brain. The first one says "Astrophysicist", and it costs $10. The second says "Avon Salesman" and costs $1000. The third says "Drummer" and costs $10,000. The customer is confused, and questions the salesperson. "why is it that the kilo of drummer's brains is so damned expensive?" he asked, the shop keep said,
"Do you know how many drummers it takes to get a kilo of brains?"
Q: What is the difference between a drummer and a vacuum cleaner?
A: You have to plug one of them in before it sucks.
Q: "How do you get two drummers to play in time?"
A: "Shoot one"
Did you hear about the bass player that locked his keys in his car? He had to break the window to get the drummer out
Q: What's the difference between a dead wombat in the middle of the road and a dead piano accordion player ?
A:The wombat was on it's way to a gig
Q: "What's the range of a fretless bass?"
A: "Twenty yards if you have a good arm"