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Author Topic: DEAR JOHNNY C  (Read 19299 times)

KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #150 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:47 »

A quick search of an about.com article about recipes for salad dressing confirms that every single type of salad dressing that does not actually have the word vinegar in its fucking name contains at least half a cup of vinegar.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #151 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:48 »

Vinegar being, as I have previously stated, the very vomit of Satan, who is the devil.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #152 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:48 »

Mayonnaise is Satans semen.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #153 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:49 »

Mayonnaise is pretty much a crime against humanity.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #154 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:49 »

One time I went to the university sandwich shop, because I was really hungry.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #155 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:49 »

And I quite fancied a sandwich.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #156 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:50 »

But all the Sandwiches had mayonnaise in them.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #157 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:52 »

So I set the whole place on fire.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #158 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:52 »

Well, I didn't actually.
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muteKi

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #159 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:52 »

Who wants to bet Johnny C comes in and deletes all of these extra posts just as he reaches 9999?
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #160 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:53 »

But I should have.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #161 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:53 »

Because they had covered their sandwiches in demon cum.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #162 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:54 »

Which is just a horrible
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #163 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:54 »

horrible thing to do.
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[22:25] Dovey: i don't get sigquoted much
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #164 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:54 »

I'm just wondering if Khar will disappear once he hits 9999
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #165 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:55 »

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zyjrbYWw0p0

KharBevNor: what a douche. -JC

NO JOHNNY

YES -JC
« Last Edit: 02 Apr 2008, 09:14 by Johnny C »
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[22:25] Dovey: i don't get sigquoted much
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #166 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:56 »

That was much quicker than I expected (that is what the lady said!).
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MadassAlex

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #167 on: 01 Apr 2008, 16:58 »

Hahaha, holy fuck.
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Patrick

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #168 on: 02 Apr 2008, 03:11 »

wruisgerhguisehruighsiuehruighseuihrg toasting in a legendary Fred
« Last Edit: 02 Apr 2008, 03:17 by Patrick »
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mooface

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #169 on: 02 Apr 2008, 08:29 »

fun fact:  there is no such things as "italian salad dressing" in italy!
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #170 on: 02 Apr 2008, 08:45 »

I would expect the same to be true about France and Bleu Cheese dressing... wait, hold on.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #171 on: 02 Apr 2008, 09:28 »

fun fact:  there is no such things as "italian salad dressing" in italy!

Let me guess do they just call them 'salad dressing'.

What with them being in Italy already and all.
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Patrick

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #172 on: 02 Apr 2008, 11:50 »

THEY LAUGH, THEY MAKE MONEY
HE'S GOT A GOLD WATCH
SHE'S GOT A SILK DRESS
AND HEALTHY BREASTS
THAT BOUNCE ON HIS locally made LEATHER SOFA
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mooface

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #173 on: 03 Apr 2008, 06:16 »

Let me guess do they just call them 'salad dressing'.

What with them being in Italy already and all.

no.  italians just don't believe in salad dressing.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #174 on: 03 Apr 2008, 07:54 »

Good for the Italians!
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #175 on: 03 Apr 2008, 08:47 »

* McTaggart scratches italy off his list of places to go to.

Do they just not eat leafy salads? Leafy salads are terribly bland unless you have an interesting dressing.

Also I have to question Khar's assertion that vinegar is the vomit of Satan. A lesser demon perhaps, but satan is pushing it no? Besides, there'd be like chunks of carrot and such it was vomit.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #176 on: 03 Apr 2008, 09:07 »

Balsamic vinegar (or even red wine vinegar) and some good olive oil will do me just fine. I don't understand the hatred of vinegar.
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TheFuriousWombat

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #177 on: 03 Apr 2008, 09:17 »

My girlfriend despises vinegar so I can never really have any even if it is mighty tasty. Malt Vinegar on fries is truly one of the best things ever.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #178 on: 03 Apr 2008, 09:28 »

* McTaggart scratches italy off his list of places to go to.

Do they just not eat leafy salads? Leafy salads are terribly bland unless you have an interesting dressing.

Also I have to question Khar's assertion that vinegar is the vomit of Satan. A lesser demon perhaps, but satan is pushing it no? Besides, there'd be like chunks of carrot and such it was vomit.


We (Italians) just use olive oil (I think that's what kind it is, never paid attention as I don't buy the groceries) and balsamic vinegar in salad.
« Last Edit: 03 Apr 2008, 09:32 by shadowsworn »
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #179 on: 03 Apr 2008, 10:20 »

My girlfriend despises vinegar so I can never really have any even if it is mighty tasty. Malt Vinegar on fries is truly one of the best things ever.

YES.  My friends think I'm weird because I eat my fries with barbecue sauce.
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muteKi

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #180 on: 03 Apr 2008, 10:49 »

Weird? Maybe.

Delicious? FUCK YEAH!
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redglasscurls

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #181 on: 03 Apr 2008, 11:14 »

You are a lucky lucky person if you have not been to Maryland and experienced people eating fries with this stuff.
Smells like a crab fucked a fish in a box of salty onions and they both died.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #182 on: 03 Apr 2008, 11:52 »

I purchased that once to season a fish with. Regrets were felt.

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #183 on: 03 Apr 2008, 13:00 »

Weird? Maybe.

Delicious? FUCK YEAH!

I Concur
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #184 on: 03 Apr 2008, 13:28 »

You know what's weird?  Ketchup.  I can't see how people eat it.  I love tomatoes and all, but ketchup is just disgusting.
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Patrick

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #185 on: 03 Apr 2008, 13:36 »

I quite like the stuff. I'm with whoever it was who was hating on mayo, though. That shit does NOT belong on a burger.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #186 on: 03 Apr 2008, 14:26 »

Manda, you fail at living in maryland.

a requirement of living here is to love old bay.  Seafood, fries, whatever.  It's all delicious.  ...when not overused.  Use too much of that shit and it ends badly.
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muteKi

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #187 on: 03 Apr 2008, 15:26 »

Mayo can be good in certain circumstances. I had a sandwich from Quizno's -- a cheesesteak type of thing -- and it had mayo on it and it was good.

Like Old Bay, there is definitely such a thing as too much of it.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #188 on: 03 Apr 2008, 15:59 »

Caesar Sauce is the real villain.

That shit is so strong I feel like dying every time I taste/smell it.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #189 on: 03 Apr 2008, 20:15 »

Mayonnaise is amazing when used correctly.  My family uses it correctly on many a dish.

But, yes, as with old bay, too much of that shit can be squirmifying.  For example, when I go to lunch, and my turkey sandwich is squishy.

No good.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #190 on: 03 Apr 2008, 21:21 »

Caesar Sauce is the real villain.

That shit is so strong I feel like dying every time I taste/smell it.

'choo talkin' bout?! Do you mean Caesar Dressing? That's the best dressing you could ever have on a salad or a wrap or a chicken/lettuce sandwich!
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #191 on: 03 Apr 2008, 21:34 »

YES.  My friends think I'm weird because I eat my fries with barbecue sauce.

This doesn't sound weird at all.  I've never actually tried it, but I imagine it's sort of like a squishier barbecue potato chip, and barbecue potato chips are delicious.  Then again, I love barbecue seasoning to a ridiculous degree, and once made an effort to prove that barbecue sauce could be good on anything if you did it right.  I think I talked about that endeavor in the fusion foods thread.

Salads can be shit or they can be great.  Crappy iceberg lettuce topped with dressing from a packet?  Probably gonna be terrible.  Spinach and baby greens with an assortment of diced vegetables, maybe some tofu or chopped nuts, tossed with fresh dressing?  Probably gonna be tastylicious.  I like to dress my salads with a mixture of peanut butter, soy sauce, garlic and five spice powder-no vinegar involved.  Unless I'm feeling decadent and break out the brown rice vinegar, which just adds a little extra sumthin'.  It's basically peanut sauce, but a little thinner and less complex so as to not overpower the flavor of the vegetables. 

Of course, I have an unrivaled love of leafy greens and vegetables.  I sometimes don't understand how people can dislike them.  Today I made a sandwich while one of my friends watched in horror.  It had hummus, shredded carrot, yellow bell peppers, portabella mushroom, and broccoli (not the best choice, but not a bad one either) on whole wheat bread.  My friend said "what are you going to drink to wash the taste of that out of your mouth?" and I was like "what are you talking about this is going to be FANTASTIC."  And it was.

I get really long winded when it comes to food.  I really like food. 

I am always amused by the fact that I completely avoid two of the major food groups, and am still less picky than most people I know. 
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muteKi

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #192 on: 03 Apr 2008, 23:21 »

Bell peppers notwithstanding that does sound pretty good.
I should not be reading stuff about food when I haven't had anything sizeable for either breakfast or dinner.
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KharBevNor

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #193 on: 04 Apr 2008, 10:50 »

I don't dislike vegetables, but salad is pretty shit.

I mean, we specifically evolved canine teeth and gall bladders so we would no longer have to eat fucking leaves.
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[22:26] Dovey: and at least one of those was a blatant ploy at getting sigquoted

http://panzerdivisio

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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #194 on: 04 Apr 2008, 13:24 »

I'm pretty sure my gall bladder is for the ability to spit alkaline in people's faces.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #195 on: 04 Apr 2008, 14:41 »

One of the most painful things in the world is eating crab, cutting the slit between your fingers on a piece of serrated shell, and getting Old Bay in the cut. 


OWCH.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #196 on: 04 Apr 2008, 14:46 »

I don't dislike vegetables, but salad is pretty shit.

Terrorist.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #197 on: 05 Apr 2008, 02:50 »

Vinegar being, as I have previously stated, the very vomit of Satan, who is the devil.
Fuckin metal! Now, we just need to get hell-greens.
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Re: DEAR JOHNNY C
« Reply #198 on: 05 Apr 2008, 10:41 »

*oh man old bay stinks*

Dude I love old bay! That stuff is really tasty. I hardly ever get it though, because I can never remember to ask for it at restaurants and stuff.

edit: oh shit pagebreak!
« Last Edit: 05 Apr 2008, 10:57 by Objects inside Clouds »
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