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Author Topic: Please, Just Let Me Die Already  (Read 182888 times)

Masterbainter

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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #100 on: 26 Feb 2009, 02:17 »

Ok, ok, so I will admit that I am a major noob at relationships. Parents are a little crazy about the dating thing. In my early twenties, but the boy I am with now is the only steady boyfriend I have ever had. I don't really know what the rules are, what's ok, and what's not ok. And that brings me to my question...

We've been together for two years, but recently his ex has come back into his life. They talk a lot, A LOT. And this makes me really uncomfortable. I don't want to make a scene, and be a crazy clingy girlfriend who keeps her man on a tight leash. But on the other hand, I do not want to get hurt, and their sudden intimacy is making me really uncomfortable. Especially since it is cutting into the time he spends on me. He tells me she is just going through a tough time in her life, and needs someone to talk to. But as a girl, I think I would find a female friend I could talk to rather than an ex who is currently in another relationship. It would make me less uncomfortable if she wasn't single, I think. He tells me he is happy, and that they are friends. But personally, I don't think friends post love poems on your myspace (which she has, recently).

Am I being crazy controlling not wanting them talking to each other like they are?

Advice please.

In your 20s and seeing him for 2 years. 

2 years is a long time especially if you are early in your 20s.

Is your relationship viewed by both parties as a serious progressing relationship?  check with him.

If you have been with this person for 2 years and can't feel comfortable confronting them about your feelings of him starting a relationship back up with his ex...

I think you need to figure out if this guy is really worth it to you.   

From just what you posted It's pretty obvious there is more than just a strictly platonic relationship between him and his ex.

Unless you are skewering the details on it. 

is he spending more time talking to, thinking about and talking to you about this girl than he is about you?
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Masterbainter

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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #101 on: 26 Feb 2009, 02:20 »

Its not like an attractive big butt. It is just a huge big butt. I mean, I could probably stack things on it. Its huge and terrible. So down playing the butt is my goal.

You'd be surprised...

Beauty is in the eye of the buttholder.

Edit: sorry for the double post.


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« Last Edit: 26 Feb 2009, 02:23 by Masterbainter »
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #102 on: 26 Feb 2009, 06:32 »

Well, I was initially intimidated by the two pages of crap that landed while I did other stuff, but there was almost zero substance. I'll tackle to stuff I feel worth tackling.

FIX IT, INTERNET

No cando. Honestly, your entire post can be summed up by the following:

I realized i'm in high school and high-school relationships don't really follow much in the way of logic. If i find a specific problem, I'll post it.

This is the answer. There is no accounting for the absolute bullshit that is relationships and stuff at fifteen. Bluntly speaking, fifteen year olds are pretty much never close enough on an emotional level between genders to actually make shit worth of sense when it comes to romantic feelings. Your friend is clearly using you and you are clearly emotionally investing yourself far too deeply into something that is quite clearly a lost cause. What you have is, by definition, a crush. Crushes don't have an expiration date. If you want to maintain a friendship, stop pursuing the guy, as he has made it clear he's not interested in that way. As much as I'd like to say he's unreasonable for the sake of your self esteem, your post (Unless missing MAJOR details) makes it pretty clear that he's not into you in that way. I really can't see anything he's doing wrong. He's not really leading you on, by definition, because he's bluntly told you there's no emotional investment, just random lust. If that's not good enough for you, you need to accept it and move on.

Jens, your problem is clearly self esteem. I didn't honestly read your post, but I already knew this. The hobby shit to shape up is one thing, but another is to practice the hobbies you are already into in a social mindset. The aforementioned photography angle is one that should be mined heavily. Photography is a fantastic way to meet people and a very likable and common hobby. Find ways outside to utilize your photography in a social atmosphere, be it going to the park to take pictures or some such. A camera also makes for a great ice breaker. If you see a pretty girl, asking her if she can take a shot for you while you get in said shot makes for a great icebreaker without coming off as creepy.

Sam, you don't get my advice. If you became any more appealing to the fairer sex, there would be no women left for everyone else. I have to think of the greater good.

Jace, 'only two days?' Seriously, man, welcome to the real world. Most people only really have two nights a week they can go out. In terms of your other situation, well, you're kind of in no man's land. I was actually there in my early twenties. I dropped out of college at twenty and worked night shifts for a long while. It does make meeting women very hard. Honestly, the only way I met women at the time was because I was working at a mall. Since quitting your job to go work at a mall to pick up women is not what I'd call an even remotely viable option, you'll have to be creative. Expand your hobbies, for one. Kung fu does not make much room for women and you honestly come off a bit two dimensional sometimes because, from my perspective, you don't seem to have enough different hobbies. Get heavier into music, as concerts are one of the better places to meet women with your current lifestyle.

Skinnyfat, your situation is hard to justify as anything but your dude fucking up royally. If your dude can't figure out on his own that what he's doing is going to fuck with your emotions, he might be kind of dumb. Conversely, the onus of responsibility in terms of bringing it up is clearly upon you. You absolutely need to tell him it makes you uncomfortable. Whether or not you're being crazy and clingy is less important than the fact you feel upset by this (For the record, there's nothing wrong with being jealous in this situation, I'd be very put off if my girlfriend started hanging out constantly with an old boyfriend who wasn't the father of her kid). The thing, though, is that he cannot be full on expected to right this situation without being told of your discomfort.

This is going to hurt, but I'll be honest. The situation is likely one of two things: either your dude is up to something behind your back or he is too oblivious to the fact that this girl obviously wants to be all up in him again to notice. Much as it sucks, I have to lean toward the former, as it's hard for me to believe there's a dude out there dumb enough to get love poems on his MySpace without putting two and two together and realizing it's time to take a step back.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #103 on: 26 Feb 2009, 07:22 »

Quote
Since I seem to be the only guy on this forum capable of maintaining a relationship at this point, it has become readily apparent that the lot of you are shitty at not breaking up with people. So, here I am to answer all of your questions concerning relationships.

I am surprised you fit through standard width doors.

And there are some of us other than you in happy, stable relationships, thank you.  And no offense, but I only take advice from people I solicit it from, and rarely take it from people who offer it.

Because those who offer it, I've found, generally have their own agenda for doing so.

Cynical?  Me?

Most definitely.

Pass.

S
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #104 on: 26 Feb 2009, 07:25 »

Ah but see, people come in here and ASK FOR ADVICE. I'm pretty sure that means it's solicited.
Take a joke.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #105 on: 26 Feb 2009, 07:31 »

Guys, I think we need to look at this(skinnyfat's situation) from different perspectives.

Are your boyfriend and this girl close? Was the poem posted on Valentine's day?

If I did the whole myspace thing, and my friends did too, I can see posting love poems to them on Valentine's day, whether they were single or not. I can say without a doubt that I love my Davis and my Jake. Jake is the guy in the relationship that I mentioned previously.


I mean, can we just stop assuming the dude is a bad guy? Maybe he is just being a really good supportive friend. Either way, Skinnyfat, you need to say something to him. It makes you uncomfortable. Say something. 
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #106 on: 26 Feb 2009, 07:46 »

blah boy i used to be friends with benefits with doesn't seem too interested in normal friendship. i am not sure if this is because of the way he sees me and potential awkwardness that may occur between us or because he is just extremely busy with grad school and it is eating his social life and he doesn't hang out with anyone at all anymore.

either way, i am a little disappointed cause i think this could have been an awesome thing.  i'm not sure whether to try to explain this to him, or just drop it entirely so i don't seem creepy and overly persistent.

thoughts?
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #107 on: 26 Feb 2009, 08:15 »

You are absolutely right Jon. In retrospect I find that I do not really talk about my love of music on the forums as much. I listen to all types of music, and I think I will find some concerts to go to instead of playing D&D friday nights. I mean, for god sake, what the fuck am I doing spending my friday nights playing fucking D&D? I am 19, I need to be going to parties and shit.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #108 on: 26 Feb 2009, 08:28 »

I liked this thread better when the makeout hobo did it.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #109 on: 26 Feb 2009, 09:00 »

Pretty much everything is better when the makeout hobo does it.


Wish I still had the password to that account.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #110 on: 26 Feb 2009, 09:07 »

I play D&D on Tuesday nights, I find that works much better for me.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #111 on: 26 Feb 2009, 09:47 »

Why do my girlfriends keep getting pregnant and then claim that it's mine?
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #112 on: 26 Feb 2009, 09:53 »

Skinnyfat,
Right now I'm in a similar situation, except I'm the ex and I think I might have some insight into your situation. My ex and I are best friends, she knows me better than anyone else and she knows exactly how to help me when I'm having a problem. The guy she is dating now originally had a problem with how close we are, and he thought I was trying to win her back. In reality, I don't at all, and she doesn't want to be with me. Granted, neither of us has written a love poem to the other, but your boyfriend might just be trying to help his ex. Definitely talk to him about, but don't automatically assume that there's anything more to it than him trying to help someone because he's the best person to do it.

Now....on to my own problems. I was in said relationship for the better part of my undergraduate life, and I really feel like I missed out on a lot because of it. Now that I'm single I want to go out with bars, have fun, date lots of people, etc. The problem is that everyone in grad school (my friends especially) are all about being 'mature' and looking for serious relationships. If we go to the bar it's to sit in the corner and drink a couple of glasses of beer. It makes it really hard to meet women, especially since most of the women in my program are in long term relationships. So, oh mighty masters of love advice, what do I do?
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #113 on: 26 Feb 2009, 14:56 »

I am surprised you fit through standard width doors.

And there are some of us other than you in happy, stable relationships, thank you.  And no offense, but I only take advice from people I solicit it from, and rarely take it from people who offer it.

Because those who offer it, I've found, generally have their own agenda for doing so.

Cynical?  Me?

Most definitely.

Pass.

S

Cynical's not the word I'm thinking. I'm thinking more overreactionary. Who are you again? And when was it you forgot how to take a joke?

Guys, I think we need to look at this(skinnyfat's situation) from different perspectives.

Are your boyfriend and this girl close? Was the poem posted on Valentine's day?

If I did the whole myspace thing, and my friends did too, I can see posting love poems to them on Valentine's day, whether they were single or not. I can say without a doubt that I love my Davis and my Jake. Jake is the guy in the relationship that I mentioned previously.


I mean, can we just stop assuming the dude is a bad guy? Maybe he is just being a really good supportive friend. Either way, Skinnyfat, you need to say something to him. It makes you uncomfortable. Say something. 

While it's counterproductive to just assume for no reason that the dude's up to mischief, general wisdom and the facts that are presented lead logically to the idea that the dude's up to mischief. He may not be, hence why she should confront him about it instead of just straight out dumping him. The guy, through intent or complete obliviousness, is not considering his girlfriend's feelings. I don't care how good of friends they are, it's inconsiderate of both him and his ex to not consider how his girlfriend of two plus years might feel about a rather sketchy situation such as this one.

Now....on to my own problems. I was in said relationship for the better part of my undergraduate life, and I really feel like I missed out on a lot because of it. Now that I'm single I want to go out with bars, have fun, date lots of people, etc. The problem is that everyone in grad school (my friends especially) are all about being 'mature' and looking for serious relationships. If we go to the bar it's to sit in the corner and drink a couple of glasses of beer. It makes it really hard to meet women, especially since most of the women in my program are in long term relationships. So, oh mighty masters of love advice, what do I do?

Honestly, part of this might be a mixture of your friends aren't considering your needs. It's not particularly difficult to carry on a serious relationship while living a mature lifestyle and still going out with your friends and making sure they have a good time. My friends did as much for me when I was single and I have since done as much for my friends since I came upon a relationship. What I would recommend is extending your social circle to include a couple more single friends who just want to have a good time. Nobody looks lamer than the dude sitting alone at a bar trying to talk to women. If you don't have any friends willing to go out and do that with you, you need more friends.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #114 on: 26 Feb 2009, 16:40 »

I liked this thread better when the makeout hobo did it.
I just had an excellent idea, but I don't think it'll go over too well.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #115 on: 26 Feb 2009, 17:22 »

You are absolutely right Jon. In retrospect I find that I do not really talk about my love of music on the forums as much. I listen to all types of music, and I think I will find some concerts to go to instead of playing D&D friday nights. I mean, for god sake, what the fuck am I doing spending my friday nights playing fucking D&D? I am 19, I need to be going to parties and shit.

D&D is definitely better for Sunday afternoon and evening.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #116 on: 26 Feb 2009, 17:46 »

Man I am reluctant to post about my love life on the internets but honestly advice might be a good idea.

I have a massive thing for my best friend and I do not know what to do. I have known her since I first started uni (so for about 2 1/2 years now), and have probably been attracted to her since the outset of our friendship. However, when we first met, I was still with my ex, and that breakup hit me pretty hard so I did not think about relationships for a while afterwards, and then I kept making excuses for not making moves and before I knew it we were incredibly close friends and saying anything felt dangerous. Around the time that would perhaps have been my best opportunity to tell her, she was having to deal with another mutual friend's unwanted advances and I did not really have the heart to potentially add more to that. Or maybe I was just making excuses again. Either way, I kept my mouth shut. I figure eventually I will get over it/meet someone else, but over 2 years down the line neither has really happened yet, despite a few unsuccessful attempts.

Anyway, we're coming to the end of our undergrad studies and everyone will be going their separate ways soon - she will most likely be staying in London, and I will either be making a short trip to Brighton or staying here too, but either way we will definitely end up seeing less of each other due to new circumstances, so the question is, do I:
a) Weather it out and hope that the extra distance and influx of new people in my life when we leave uni will help me move on.
or
b) Finally let her know how I feel, safe in the knowledge that even if it explodes in my face, it will only be a few months before we are all doing different things in different places.

Whatever happens, I do not want to ruin our friendship as it is the best thing, but at the same time maybe I should stop letting potential good things pass me by.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #117 on: 26 Feb 2009, 18:12 »

Definitely let her know how you feel.

HOWEVER, and this is the hard part, you really should present it in a way that says "I'll be OK if I don't get together with you or anything."  And then you have to actually be OK with that.  The thing you really don't want to do here is drop your emotional health in her lap and say "From the moment I tell you that I'm really into you, I'm only going to be happy if things go my way and we get together ... if you don't return these feelings, I will be in a lot of pain and you will be the reason why."  That is what you absolutely totally do NOT want her to hear.

See the thing is, either the feeling is mutual or it isn't, and if it isn't, you really don't want her to feel bad about it.  That would be terrible because then you both would be feeling shitty ... her for not returning the feelings you have which are obviously so important to you, and you for making her feel shitty over something like that (and of course over not being with her).  So your optimal situation here is one in which she feels safe and comfortable with you even if she doesn't want to be with you.  That is what you are shooting for.  If she doesn't want to be with you, the LAST thing you want is for her to feel bad about that.

So basically you have to take responsibility for your feelings and make it clear that there's nothing wrong with whatever she might be feeling, but you have a lot of attraction to her.  It's a tricky business and I wish you the best of luck.
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Guido Sarducci

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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #118 on: 26 Feb 2009, 18:21 »

Whatever happens, I do not want to ruin our friendship as it is the best thing, but at the same time maybe I should stop letting potential good things pass me by.

I have had, and have, a lot of good friends. I have only had one great love. In my experience, you can often find good friends by being a nice guy and sharing your jelly beans once in a while. Love, however, is rare. And while it is a gamble, if I found a woman who excited me intellectually and I found her attractive, I would be willing to risk the friendship. I would also force myself to be honest--your relationship left the realm of friends when you became interested in her romantically.  That isn't hard and fast. I have had friends who I was attrected to and they knew it, and it was no big deal because attraction and timeliness and urgency don't often coincide. But if this is real to you, and it is not a short termgot the hots, and IF she is really your friend, you owe it to her to be honest about what is driving you.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #119 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:23 »

So I met this guy and I had fun hanging out with him, but I have no real desire to do it again. I think I'm broken. Halp.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #120 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:27 »

So I met this guy and I had fun hanging out with him, but I have no real desire to do it again. I think I'm broken. Halp.

You could start wearing dark clothing and cut yourself and snear a lot.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #121 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:30 »

I wear dark clothing sometimes, I already get enough paper cuts as is, and I only sneer when people do stupid things. Please try again!
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #122 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:34 »

It's because we're meant to be, Linds.

Obviously.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #123 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:40 »

So I met this guy and I had fun hanging out with him, but I have no real desire to do it again. I think I'm broken. Halp.
He's ugly right? He's totally ugly.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #124 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:41 »

Ozy - Obviously.

Gilead - He's not ugly, but I'm not attracted to him.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #125 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:42 »

I wear dark clothing sometimes, I already get enough paper cuts as is, and I only sneer when people do stupid things. Please try again!

Do you have the appropriate tiny little car with no heater?


Do you totally need to be attracted to him? You could always close your eyes and hum Rule Britannia and think of cherry trees in the spring air...
« Last Edit: 26 Feb 2009, 19:44 by Guido Sarducci »
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Ozymandias

Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #126 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:43 »

Linds, if you're not attracted to him, it can't be helped. It's just a thing.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #127 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:47 »

Ok.

I have a spacious compact car with a rather good heating system. Also, my car does not bring all the boys to the yard, so let's not discuss the Blue Meanie.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #128 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:47 »

Ozy - Obviously.

Gilead - He's not ugly, but I'm not attracted to him.

Oh right, totally, I getcha <|; ]
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #129 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:52 »

Blue Meanie.
Is this a nickname for your car or something? The only blue meanie I can think of is the mushroom kind...
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #130 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:55 »

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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #131 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:56 »

but I'm not attracted

I don't think I've actually been attracted to someone since I was super-into this girl just about ten months ago now. I think it is due to other changes in my life-view as well as that, but I haven't felt that powerful crush or attraction I used to get. It is weird.
I mean, there have been a handful of ladies and I have liked them all in different ways to different degrees but I have not had that 'man I want to bone you and also date you and hang out with you and fuck maybe I could see myself settling down with you whatever let's give it a go eh?' feeling for a while.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #132 on: 26 Feb 2009, 19:57 »

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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #133 on: 26 Feb 2009, 20:00 »

you have got to be kidding me. People still know what the Yellow Submarine is? I sudden;y don't feel so old  :-D

You know, slick makes some sense Linds. After my divorce I don't think I will be attracted to another woman for a long while. But that doesn't mean I can't go out on dates with people I'm not attracted to, right? I mean, a date for the dates sake isn't a bad thing. You don't always have to be consumed with the idea of falling i love or getting laid...
« Last Edit: 26 Feb 2009, 20:02 by Guido Sarducci »
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #134 on: 27 Feb 2009, 01:29 »

I play D&D on Tuesday nights, I find that works much better for me.

We were playing on Monday nights, but two of the guys always had to leave early because they have college/work in the morning. And so they moved it to Friday, but I'm just totally unwilling to give up my Friday night to go sit in a room full of dudes.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #135 on: 27 Feb 2009, 05:52 »

Quote
And when was it you forgot how to take a joke?

*looks at watch* What day is again it? *Hic*

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D&D is definitely better for Sunday afternoon and evening.

*Looks at watch again* Damn!  Not this Sunday.  Gun Show in Tampa instead.  Anybody need anything?

S
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #136 on: 27 Feb 2009, 06:53 »

Dear relationships thread. My problem is not so much that there is a girl I like, or that there is a girl who likes me, or that I am in a bad relationship. My problem is that there is nobody. How do I meet girls who are both attractive and intelligent? Answer me that, and I'll... Fuckin'... Do something impressive. And photograph it for you guys. It needs to be a good answer too. Nothin' half-arsed.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #137 on: 27 Feb 2009, 07:51 »

Build a boat, build it tall and proud, pour into it your will and your drive; your personal strength of spirit will show in it and when people see it they will recognize that you are truly a noble soul, a man of actions and ability, a person of resource and motive, someone who can dream and someone who can see. And when the floods come, bitches be all linin' up to get in on the raft before the shit hits kno what i'm sayin'?
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #138 on: 27 Feb 2009, 08:30 »

Dear relationships thread. My problem is not so much that there is a girl I like, or that there is a girl who likes me, or that I am in a bad relationship. My problem is that there is nobody. How do I meet girls who are both attractive and intelligent? Answer me that, and I'll... Fuckin'... Do something impressive. And photograph it for you guys. It needs to be a good answer too. Nothin' half-arsed.


Post an ad on craigslist. Full proof.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #139 on: 27 Feb 2009, 09:04 »

Dear relationships thread. My problem is not so much that there is a girl I like, or that there is a girl who likes me, or that I am in a bad relationship. My problem is that there is nobody. How do I meet girls who are both attractive and intelligent? Answer me that, and I'll... Fuckin'... Do something impressive. And photograph it for you guys. It needs to be a good answer too. Nothin' half-arsed.

Insufficient data.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #140 on: 27 Feb 2009, 11:50 »

but I'm not attracted

I don't think I've actually been attracted to someone since I was super-into this girl just about ten months ago now. I think it is due to other changes in my life-view as well as that, but I haven't felt that powerful crush or attraction I used to get. It is weird.
I mean, there have been a handful of ladies and I have liked them all in different ways to different degrees but I have not had that 'man I want to bone you and also date you and hang out with you and fuck maybe I could see myself settling down with you whatever let's give it a go eh?' feeling for a while.
Dude I know exactly what you mean. Not since she came out to me. :oops:
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #141 on: 27 Feb 2009, 15:49 »

I liked this thread better when Midnight Umbreon did it.

I searched for this thread and I laughed at it.
I
typed
kind of like
this.
It was
incredibly
annoying looking
.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #142 on: 27 Feb 2009, 16:44 »

Say it ain't so, Joe!
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #143 on: 27 Feb 2009, 16:57 »

I'm still in Be My Head's signature though.
That's what the purpose of that thread was.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #144 on: 28 Feb 2009, 12:05 »

Jeans,

A lot of people already gave you suggestions for hobbies, but I'm going to throw my 2 cents anyway. I would suggest joining a gym and making a serious commitment to go regularly. Not only will you get stronger and healthier, but working our releases hormones (endorphins?) that make you feel good.  After a few weeks you will notice your body changing and the progress will encourage you to work even harder. I go around the same time of day every time I go and always run into the same people every time and have started to make a few friendships there. There are plenty of girls to talk to/look at, especially if you decide on a yoga, pilates, or spinning class.
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Well yes but (sorry andy) she doesn't look half as fucking bad ass as this motherfucker in Poland.

Dude is hardcore.

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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #145 on: 28 Feb 2009, 12:19 »

Not always the case Nobo, some people just genuinely despise excersise for the sake of excersise, which is why so many gym memberships fail so miserably. Doesn't matter for some people if they start seeing results or not. It really does sound like his best bet involves a fun hobby that happens to have a side effect of being physically demanding.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #146 on: 28 Feb 2009, 12:45 »

I think if you go into it with the right attitude and have reasonable goals, then it can be very rewarding. However, I am only speaking of my experience, and I certainly can't speak for anyone else. I just suggested the gym as a way of doing a physically demanding hobby and surrounded yourself with people doing the same thing. Stuff like cycling or running seem very solitary unless you look for clubs or groups of people to do it with.
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Well yes but (sorry andy) she doesn't look half as fucking bad ass as this motherfucker in Poland.

Dude is hardcore.

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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #147 on: 28 Feb 2009, 13:02 »

jens whatever you do, please please please do not buy any books claiming they will teach you what women really want or how to get any lady you want and thus improve your confidence vastly.  they offer horrible advice, and i am convinced that every guy who actually takes them seriously ends up turning into a huge dick.

Ahaha, I actually did this once. Not so much far advice to see what it was about though. I read five pages before thinking "man, this guy is an asshole" so I went and got my money back.

Thanks for the advice, folks! hobby it is. I have no idea what it is going to be though.

I just had to go back and reply to this.

Check out Oslo Vápenleikr.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Owbb52innXE

I do this. It's made out of awesome and cookies. And swords.
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #148 on: 28 Feb 2009, 14:20 »

Jens Jens Jens! Parkour! do it now! it's an originally french activity; seriously, it's really cool. it's hard to explain though. to simplify it greatly, it's the art of getting from point A to point B in the most efficient way possible (vault over that fence instead of walking around it etc.). I've been described as a street ninja before, which i decide to take as a compliment. It's not the most amazingly well-known thing, which makes it cool i guess! It's a very physical activity, and you get a good workout without feeling like you're dying. also, it really turns heads in public, usually in a "woah-did-you-see-that-i-want-to-get-to-know-that-dude" kind of way. here is a youtube video showing off Parkour and Freerunning, which is, in a simplified description, Parkour but with flips and whatnot (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEeqHj3Nj2c). also, here is a good website with a forum and tons of articles and stuff (http://www.americanparkour.com/). If I remember correctly, you live in Norway not America, but it's a great site. I hope you give it a try, the world needs more traceurs and traceuses! (french for parkourist and lady-parkourist, respectively).

Also, on a more on-topic note, I was going to post some of my common girl issues, but then I realized i'm in high school and high-school relationships don't really follow much in the way of logic. If i find a specific problem, I'll post it.



PARKOUR PARKOUR PARKOUR! seriously i was thinking this reading the thread and am glad you brought it up. it's hell impressive i'd do it but i'm not in shape at all. but it's amazing
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Re: The Relationship, Or Lack Thereof, Advice Thread
« Reply #149 on: 28 Feb 2009, 14:36 »

So my date cancelled on me. And I got pissed, and said "whatevs, that's fine." And now I have no one to go to Watchmen with. And I am grouchy about it, and bitterly single. And I think my whole movie experience is ruined now.
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