Fun Stuff > CHATTER
THE REALLY BAD JOKES THREAD
Vern LaVey:
--- Quote from: Coward on 11 May 2009, 04:42 ---How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable?
AIDS.
--- End quote ---
Simple, Offensive... I love it!
It comes off as an old "staple" joke, but I've never heard it.
Zingoleb:
I liked the AIDS joke, too.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, grandma was beating off the Indians while the cavalry was coming.
Chad K.:
A man with an enormous head the shade of a construction cone walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender pours his drink, and tries to avoid looking, but he's drawn to the man's enormous day-glo melon. Finally he can't help it anymore and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, and I don't mean to be rude but..."
At which point the man cuts him off with a smile and says, "I know, I know. Don't worry I get this one all the time. You want to know how I got to be like this, right?" "Well, yeah," says the bartender.
"Here's the thing," says the man. "I was walking along the beach one day, when I came upon a lamp that looked like something straight out of 'Lawrence of Arabia'. Of course, I rub it, and sure enough a genie pops out and offers me three wishes. So the first wish I make is to be independently wealthy, which he granted. To this day, I don't believe I'll ever have to want for money again."
"That's amazing," said the bartender. "I know," said the man.
"The second wish," said the man, "Was to meet the love of my life, who would love me forever in return. And sure enough, he introduced me to my wonderful wife."
"That's beautiful," said the bartender, "but what about the third wish?"
"See, that's where I think I went wrong," said the man.
"Why, what'd you wish for?"
"A giant orange head."
Patrick:
A buddy of mine told me this one, a friend of his is serving in Iraq and heard it going around and decided to share.
Why are Iraqis like pool balls?
The harder you whack them around, the more English you get.
Zingoleb:
Two Iraqi mothers are showing each other pictures of their sons. One of them sighs, "They blow up so fast."
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