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THE REALLY BAD JOKES THREAD

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TrekkieTechie:
A horse walks into a bar.
Bartender looks at him, asks "Why the long face?"

Really Bad Pickup Line:

Suitor: "Have you ever had your belly button touched?"
Suitee: "Yeah..."
Suitor: "From the inside?"

Johnny C:

--- Quote from: TrekkieTechie on 18 Jul 2007, 21:57 ---Really Bad Pickup Line:

Suitor: "Have you ever had your belly button touched?"
Suitee: "Yeah..."
Suitor: "Oh. Well, see you later!"

--- End quote ---

Jimmy the Squid:
A man goes to the doctor because he is feeling a bit ill. The doctor tells him that he will need to get a semen, urine and stool sample. The man replies "Gee, Doc, I'm in a big hurry. Can I just leave you my underpants?"

mooface:
 Why was Cinderella bad at baseball?
 She had a pumkin for a coach and was always running from the ball!

What does an agnostic dyslexic insomniac do?
Sit up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse were in divorce court and the judge said to Mickey, "You say here that your wife is crazy."
Mickey replied, "No I didn't. I said she is fuckin' Goofy."

Question: What lives at the bottom of the sea and shakes?
Answer: A nervous wreck!

RobbieOC:
Q: What's big and green and if it falls out of a tree will kill you?
A: A pool table.

Q: What is Michael Jackson's favorite thing about twenty eight year olds?
A: There's twenty of them. (But gosh darn, I do love Michael anyway.)

History joke:


--- Quote ---A millionare goes to the doctor and finds out that he is going to die in two weeks. He has had three passions his whole life and before he dies, he decides he wants to indulge all three so he can be happy. These three passions are art, history, and Paris. So, he cals an artist friend and tells him that he is going to Paris for two weeks, and when he comes back he wants the artist to have painted a mural on his wall. He wants the artist to paint Custer's last stand, so he can get both art and history in one go. So, he leaves and has a great time in Paris. When he returns, the artist is waiting outside his house, shaking with anticipation. He tells the millionare "It may be a little more abstract than you were wanting, but I think it's brilliant!" The millionare tells him he is sure it is OK, and asks to see it. The artists leads him to the painting and pulls the sheet off the wall to reveal it. The millionare is shocked. On his wall is a painting of a cow with a halo over his head and a whole bunch of Indians having sex with each other. He looks at the artist, not sure what to say, but the artist fills the silence. "I know it looks wierd now, but wait til you hear what I've titled it!" The millionare indulges him and asks the name of the painting. The artist smiles and says:

"Holy cow! Look at all the fucking Indians!"
--- End quote ---

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