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Author Topic: Hardcore-ifying fun, but old and archaic games and other media.  (Read 10141 times)

satsugaikaze

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Basically as fanchildren we tell people what sorts of games we'd like to see hardcore-ified into whatever category you want. Warning: fanchildishness may be found here. You have been warned.

eg.

I'd like to see the first few original Contra remade into a 3rd person shooter on the X360 and PS3. *explains*
I'd like to see the Japanese Iron Chef series made into a hardcore cooking battle-type thing complete with dodgy english dubs for the Wii and DS. *explains*

Fire away! =D
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Melodic

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Tetris hardcore-ified into Children Of Men.
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And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

öde

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Pikmin hardcore-ified into Apocalypse Now.
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Cartilage Head

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Pokemon hardcore-ified into Michael Vick's dogfighting circuit.
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Ozymandias

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Cooking Mama hardcore-ifed into a Dio video.
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Emaline

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That last one made me lol.
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benji

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I don't think I understand. To be considered hardcore, does it need to graphically depict penetration?
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est

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I think you're thinking of Screamo.
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Melodic

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Ooh, ooh. Half-Life 2 hardcore-ified into Mythbusters.
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And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

MusicScribbles

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Portal hardcorified into Sliders, and it is great to be back.
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carrotosaurus

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Best idea ever.
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Stryc9Fuego

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Ooh! Ooh! Super Mario Bros. hardcore-ified into a Ron Jeremy flick.

Oh yeah... it's been done.

A cross between Duck Hunt and Legend of Zelda, primarily involving Navi from Ocarina of Time.
"Hey!" "Listen!"
BLAM!

You know you want it.

Nodaisho

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Only if I can shoot that goddamn dog.
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satsugaikaze

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Only if I can shoot Navi.
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Cartilage Head

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 That was the joke.
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Melodic

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Man you guys, that was heck of obvious.
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And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

JD

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Diddy Kong racing hardcore-ified into into Death Race
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satsugaikaze

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Crash Team Racing hard-core-ified into...


Wait, we can't do that. It's already hardcore.
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David_Dovey

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Hardcoreifying this thread into something that makes a lick of sense
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Stryc9Fuego

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It makes sense to me; you take either games that suck, or games that are good, yet tame, and turn it up to 11.

Like remaking Barbie Horse Adventures into MurderPolo.

Melodic

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I think this thread is better without making sense.

Ice Climbers hardcore-ified into Crank.
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And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

satsugaikaze

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^ I like that idea.

Oh, imagine the violence.
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öde

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Contra hardcore-ified into... uh.
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Melodic

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Death Race 2000.
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And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

David_Dovey

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Hardcorifying horse dicks into whale dicks
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satsugaikaze

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You could at least limit the sickery to the video games. <__<
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Dimmukane

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He's allowed to make drunk posts if he wants.
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DonInKansas

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Mario Kart hardcoreified into Twisted Metal.
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I mean, it would still suck, but at least it would suck creatively.

David_Dovey

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He's allowed to make drunk posts if he wants.

I was perfectly sober when I made that post fuck you
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It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

Storm Rider

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This thread sucks.
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Stryc9Fuego

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This is weird. Normally, some of the best threads start out sucky, then someone makes some odd tangenital non-sequitor, and it shoots up to awesome. That's JUST NOT HAPPENING here!

We need someone to hardcore-ify this thread.

David_Dovey

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I'm fucking trying
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It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

Boro_Bandito

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Dude the Mario Kart hard-corified into Twisted Metal was not bad. Everyone remember that game? When Twisted Metal: Black came out I thought my world had ended and I was doomed to the abyss of a dark room while killing people with an ice-cream truck. Now, if you could hard-corify twisted metal into a game that would sell on today's markets, that would be something I think I could suck the next seven dicks I see for.
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Yeah, I mean, "I won't kill and eat you if you won't kill and eat me" is typically a ground rule for social groups.

Melodic

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This is weird. Normally, some of the best threads start out sucky, then someone makes some odd tangenital non-sequitor, and it shoots up to awesome. That's JUST NOT HAPPENING here!

We need someone to hardcore-ify this thread.

Sorry dude, I let loose the non-sequitor too early. Like, second post.
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And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

est

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Dig-Dug hardcore-ified into your mom
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Melodic

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Pac-Man hardcore-ified into abstinence-only sex-education.
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And if you played too hard it'd flop out and dangle around by the wire and that is just super ugly

Stryc9Fuego

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Dude the Mario Kart hard-corified into Twisted Metal was not bad. Everyone remember that game? When Twisted Metal: Black came out I thought my world had ended and I was doomed to the abyss of a dark room while killing people with an ice-cream truck. Now, if you could hard-corify twisted metal into a game that would sell on today's markets, that would be something I think I could suck the next seven dicks I see for.
My favorite thing about Twisted Metal: Black was the credits music, Paint it Black. I love that song.

Boro_Bandito

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If that's the best thing you liked about the game.... like, couldn't you just listen to it elsewhere in a better quality/more complete version?
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Yeah, I mean, "I won't kill and eat you if you won't kill and eat me" is typically a ground rule for social groups.

snalin

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traffic education hardcore-ified into Midtown Madness.

^^
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Stryc9Fuego

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If that's the best thing you liked about the game.... like, couldn't you just listen to it elsewhere in a better quality/more complete version?
That's why I'm glad I only rented it. Seriously, it's a fighting game in cars.

Boro_Bandito

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exactly. it was a fighting game in cars. That's fuckin' awesome. rev the engine, then shoot a missile at a guy riding a motorcycle who's got a skull for a head.
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Yeah, I mean, "I won't kill and eat you if you won't kill and eat me" is typically a ground rule for social groups.

Stryc9Fuego

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I just think it would have been better if it were like a racing game with missiles.

Then again, I enjoyed Wipeout.

ackblom12

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So Rock N' Roll Racing? Cause that game was amazing.

Twisted Metal on the other hand I thought was total shit gameplay wise.
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