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Weirdest Ending of A Relationship?
Alex C:
I think the irritating thing is that not everyone is selfish/unselfish or social/anti-social to the same degree. Varying degrees of circumstances and evolution come about and variations occur. I'm considerably more selfish and less social than my sister, for example. All of our disagreements that I can think of in the past have come about from having different opinions about what is reasonable to expect from other people. My sister is very friendly and sociable. She gets annoyed that people are rude and don't always return greetings etc. On the other hand, I'm fairly reclusive and I find nothing more annoying than someone being relentlessly polite and then acting put out when I don't return the gestures. By my way of thinking, I don't really owe anyone anything until I ask them for something and they oblige. Everything else is volunteered. There's honestly days where I feel a bit put upon when a clerk at a cash register tries making small talk. My sister, on the other hand, wonders what she did to deserve being treated like an object rather than a person.
jhocking:
--- Quote from: Thomas Edison on 19 Nov 2008, 16:34 ---Whilst this is the kind of philosophy of life I'd happily subscribe to, it's also the kind of philosophy that makes me just want to drop college and everything and go out there and enjoy life.
--- End quote ---
My take on the idea of always doing what you enjoy is similar to the view I read in one of Paul Graham's essays. He suggested that you should think about what you want in a time frame of one year. That is, at any given moment sure you'd rather be having sex or whatever, but it's much more productive to think in terms of always doing something that will lead to something you want within a year.
est:
--- Quote from: Ptommydski on 19 Nov 2008, 16:30 ---Is funny! She remind me of last week, no?
--- End quote ---
In this case "nice guy" != "nice guy"
And I don't think that selfish behaviour is "thinking outside the box", or even very hard to grasp the idea of at all. As you said, humans are inherently selfish beings, but that is because we are animals and animals are inherently selfish. Being selfish is pretty much the default human state, that is why children behave in the manner they do and are so goddamned mean to one another sometimes.
I'm not even sure why I keep talking about this, because from what I've seen you're not how you describe yourself. From your actions it is evident that you do care about other people, I am not sure why you would say otherwise. I'm basically just arguing against something you have said rather than something you are, which seems pointless.
tania:
i'll probably contribute to this discussion after i've taken the time to read it all, but for now here's my contribution to the thread's original topic -
i don't so much have "relationships" as "guys i am sleeping with" but i did have a thing with a guy last summer who would always, after sex, launch into this massive tirade about how much he hated this one girl (awkwardly enough, also a friend of mine) who had broken up with him after she realized she was gay and how, even though she had been with her girlfriend for almost two years at that point, it was "just a phase" and eventually she'd realize he was the one for her and rekindle the relationship. after it became apparent this was a major complex for him i decided the best thing to do would be to break things off so he could sort himself out. kind of unfortunate since i was only really looking for something casual at that point and he otherwise fit all the criteria of being incredibly smart and attractive and funny and good at sex and all that, but then there's that whole thing with the crazy ex-girlfriend hating and sort of offensive disrespect for gay couples.
i think it was the right decision to make.
Slick:
(sorry for de-railing you breakup thread)
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