Topic: Unisex Bathrooms - now with TMI! (Read 44472 times)

Siibillam-Law · « **Reply #150 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 14:57 »

Quote from: DynamiteKid on 09 Dec 2008, 14:49

At a university over here apparently there was some furore becuase the transsexual students considered the terms 'male' and 'female' to be descriminatory on the toilet doors. So now it's 'toilets' and 'toilets with urinals.'

YOU CAN PISS STANDING UP INTO A NORMAL TOILET ANYWAY.

And if you really need to try that hard to get offended by something, I think you probably deserve to be offended.

Simple solution really: change the "handicapped" toilet to "minority groups" toilet, and then we can leave those awesome little people on the door

KvP · « **Reply #151 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 14:59 »

Quote from: tania on 09 Dec 2008, 14:51

me and my housemates fart all over each other all the time, it ain't no thang

I'm sorry that is improper.

dennis · « **Reply #152 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 15:20 »

ONE RESTROOM. INSIDE, A LONG TROUGH WITH A CONTINUOUS FLOW OF WATER.

Siibillam-Law · « **Reply #153 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 15:32 »

Quote from: tania on 09 Dec 2008, 14:51

me and my housemates fart all over each other all the time, it ain't no thang

Two people, milling about each other, trying to get the first fart. Room slowly filling with shit particles

Ah pleasentries

Thrillho · « **Reply #154 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 16:12 »

Quote from: Siibillam-Law on 09 Dec 2008, 15:32

Quote from: tania on 09 Dec 2008, 14:51
me and my housemates fart all over each other all the time, it ain't no thang

Two people, milling about each other, trying to get the first fart. Room slowly filling with shit particles

Ah pleasentries

You have the greatest fucking avatar on this fucking forum. If your name was Captain Hair, you'd win the forum.

spoon_of_grimbo · « **Reply #155 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 16:16 »

Quote from: Drill King on 09 Dec 2008, 13:36

I was thinking today about how many guys I know that are utterly disgusted if a girl makes a comment about her poop. This is totally because tons of guys can't find a chick hot if they hear her pooping.

(I am saying this as a blanket for some men, I know a lot of guys are bigger than that but..)

tbh, i can usually "switch off" to toilet sounds if i'm in a close enough vicinity to hear them, so that's not an issue, but i actually think it's cool if a girl can talk about that kinda thing like guys tend to, or if she can fart without making a fuss. i actually find it annoying when girls (or ANYONE for that matter) gets all shocked and offended when someone farts or talks about that kinda thing.

actually, a cool thing happened the other day in relation to poop-talk... i was round a mate's house, and my mate had just returned from the toilet when we heard his female housemate shout from upstairs "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL?!" When she came down, i nodded towards my friend and said "he's just given admiral browning an honorable burial at sea," to which she laughed and then launched into a 10minute conversation with us about pooping euphemisms!

Quote from: nobo on 07 Dec 2008, 16:23

re: pee/poop colors

if you drink alot of grape kool-aid or grape gatorade your dumps turn NEON GREEN. I had a scare senior year of college, but a little bit of internet research brought rest to all my fears. you have to drink a lot of the purple drink though, if you only do it half ass and drink a quart or so, you get a deep forest green instead of neon.

Also, if you eat too much borsch (polish beet soup) it turns your piss orange/red, and your dumps completely beet red. And energy drinks - neon yellow/greenish.

i had one of those slush-ice drink things at a fairground in hamburg once. it was blue. and apparently that was because of INDUSTRIAL STRENGTH COLOURING AGENT, because my shit turned full on grass-green. scary at first, but incredibly amusing when i realised what had caused it!

ViolentDove · « **Reply #156 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 16:51 »

Three people in my lab are currently working on bacteria from faecal samples*. Many people in the lab and from our department donate samples for them to work on. Consequently, we make a lot of poo jokes. Also, I totally won the prize for the least antibiotic-resistant bacteria in the digestive tract. I kinda wanted some kind of trophy.

*Thankfully, I'm not one of them. Also, did you know you need to fill out a 60 page document and apply for ethics approval to work with your own shit? It's bizarre.

tania · « **Reply #157 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 17:00 »

there must be some kind of poo-related lawsuit behind every single one of those pages

tania · « **Reply #158 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 17:33 »

on-topic: yesterday i bought some high-fiber cereal then today got super hungry and ate a whole bunch of it cos it was so delicious and i forgot all about the fiber part. it is really really high in fiber. like, i think it is actually meant to help people who are unhealthy and frequently constipated and also not meant to be eaten in the quantity i just did. now i am a little bit terrified of what is going to happen to me next time i poop.

Runa · « **Reply #159 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 17:37 »

Quote from: tania on 09 Dec 2008, 14:51

me and my housemates fart all over each other all the time, it ain't no thang

When I was 10, I ate 6 re-fried bean burritos. It was the first night I ever stayed the night with my childhood friend. The icebreaker between us was, giving her a dutch oven in the middle of the night. It was awesome. My own fumes had me leaving the room. Up until the end of our day's together we'd catch each other off guard, bend over in the others ear and just let go.

As for my pooin' habits, I'm just naturally a pooey person to begin with. Once in the morning, and then late at night. It really gets me when I'm away from home, cause it's not that I'm ashamed that I do poop. It's that, I can't concentrate unless I'm in my bathroom at my parents house. And I'm moving out next month, no visits home either because it's 5 hours away.. wish me luck.

Vendetagainst · « **Reply #160 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 17:47 »

Ooh, fun story! When my sister was yonger she was very sensitive to smells and had a strong gag reflex. One day (I would have been seven-ninish) my sister, mom, and I were in my sister's room talking and I farted. My sister tried to run to the bathroom but ended up vomiting all over the floor. And we all had a big laugh about it shortly after.

I am still filled with sophomoric glee at the memory.

Dimmukane · « **Reply #161 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 18:15 »

Oh, man. Me and my little brother were throwing a bean bag around. This is when he was like, 10. After a little while he took off his sweatpants and just played in his boxers. Kept playing for another ten minutes. Then all of the sudden, whilst holding my bean bag, he takes off his boxers and runs out into the hall, and just takes a dump on the floor. I could not stop laughing for the next 20 minutes. He apparently could not stop playing catch to go to the bathroom. Just thinking about it now is bringing me to tears.

Edith · « **Reply #162 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 19:28 »

I once shat on a street corner in Guatemala, then wiped with my underwear and left them on top of the pile of poo. Well, more like a puddle of poo. I was suffering the aftereffects of eating food from a street vendor. Also, I was wearing a skirt, that's how I got the underwear off. Also, don't eat food from a street vendor. Just like the guidebooks say, it's a bad idea.

Vendetagainst · « **Reply #163 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 19:31 »

Was the food at least tasty?

Jace · « **Reply #164 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 19:31 »

GUYS! I go to the bathroom and thats it. I don't check the consistency of it or any of that. You are all wierd!

Edith · « **Reply #165 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 19:34 »

Man, the food was SO tasty. But I had the shakes for about two days afterwards. Not to mention the poo.

Inlander · « **Reply #166 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 19:38 »

Your body was overwhelmed by the flavour. It was grieving for the flavour that it would never taste again.

tania · « **Reply #167 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 19:42 »

i pooped on someone's lawn once while i was out on a run. apparently this isn't so uncommon as running (actually, cardio in general) makes you digest a lot quicker. at the time i didn't know you were supposed to try to poop in advance before running. obviously i wasn't proud of this but i was also like 5km from home and there wasn't anything else i could do. i am really hoping the owner of the house thought it was a dog or something.

very shamefully, i told this to my friend after it happened and was expecting him to be disgusted or angry but instead he laughed and said the exact same thing had once happened to him too! amazing.

also, edith, i heard a story from my sister similar to yours, only instead of street vendor food it was a fruit. she was doing an internship in ghana and was told repeatedly not to drink the water there without purifying it first, so she abided by this very diligently and then one day bought a pineapple off the street and ate the entire thing forgetting that fruit is about 95% water. anyway this resulted in her pooping on the stairs in a building and leaving her underwear on a windowsill and running away. she is also the smartest person i know, a lesson that you should never judge a book by it's cover/a person by their poop.

jhocking · « **Reply #168 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 19:49 »

Quote from: Inlander on 09 Dec 2008, 19:38

Your body was overwhelmed by the flavour. It was grieving for the flavour that it would never taste again.

oh so look who decided to join the conversation after all

Quote from: stale on 06 Dec 2008, 16:58

People, you're all pretty cool folks, but sometimes I do not need to know all about your excretory habits and toiletry preferences. - Inlander (P.S.: sorry for hijacking your thread title, stale.)

Gilead · « **Reply #169 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 19:50 »

Quote from: Edith on 09 Dec 2008, 19:28

I once shat on a street corner in Guatemala, then wiped with my underwear and left them on top of the pile of poo. Well, more like a puddle of poo. I was suffering the aftereffects of eating food from a street vendor. Also, I was wearing a skirt, that's how I got the underwear off. Also, don't eat food from a street vendor. Just like the guidebooks say, it's a bad idea.

Gather round children, and attend the sad and terrible tale of the day that the feminine mystique died.

fatty · « **Reply #170 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 20:04 »

Re: "toilets with urinals".

I really do not think this will make gender-confused people any less confused. In fact, it is liable to make me even more confused. There are some obvious things to be addressed about attitudes towards transgendered people, but i don't really think this is a solution. I'd say having a unisex bathroom, or male/female/unisex would be preferable.

Eris · « **Reply #171 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 20:09 »

When I was younger my family went to England for a year, and in school holidays we went camping at places around Europe. In france, the campsite had toilets with a door that said "male", and a door that said "female" on opposite sides of a building. When mum and I went in one door while Dad and Ro went in the other, we met up at the middle. Both doors led to the same set of toilets.

I like that idea.

jhocking · « **Reply #172 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 20:23 »

Quote from: Eris on 09 Dec 2008, 20:09

Both doors led to the same set of toilets.

brilliant! It's like an absurdist art installation.

Patrick · « **Reply #173 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:12 »

Quote from: PantsFTW on 09 Dec 2008, 19:31

GUYS! I go to the bathroom and thats it. I don't check the consistency of it or any of that. You are all wierd!

Man what the hell kind of person doesn't like to take a gander at their creation? We had this AWESOME German toilet when we lived in Luxembourg. Fucker had a poo *shelf* so that you could examine it for parasites (or lulz). It was the coolest and most disgustingly useful thing ever and I totally want one.

Jace · « **Reply #174 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:13 »

It is my waste. I do not need to see it.

tania · « **Reply #175 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:19 »

i was having that conversation with a friend earlier this week actually, on why people look at their poop before they flush. i am annoyingly logical and take an evolutionary approach to everything all the time and my guess is this must be an inborn instinctual thing to check for parasites or signs of bad health, like what patrick said.

Nodaisho · « **Reply #176 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:22 »

We had something similar to the two doors one room thing at a camp I was at once for a school trip. So, there were four rooms in the lodge, the upper rooms were usually for girls, the lower ones usually for guys. Now, the rooms were on the edge of the building, with the bathrooms next to them on the inside, and the staircase between those. The bunks led to the nearest bathroom, ours said boys, since we were on the bottom floor. Here's the thing: on the main door into them, it said girls bathroom. You can imagine how well that went, I guess the teachers didn't know about it, and the staff didn't bother mentioning it.

tania, I don't know about you, but I look so I don't just randomly drop the toilet paper.

jhocking · « **Reply #177 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:23 »

Every time I take a shit it looks different than the last time. It is like an ever-changing art exhibit.

Nodaisho · « **Reply #178 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:25 »

Tomorrow, in the news: "Art critics awed by display of feces"

jhocking · « **Reply #179 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:28 »

Actually, there are a number of artists who really do smear their feces on canvases.

Nodaisho · « **Reply #180 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:32 »

Wasn't that one of the things the guy that did the covers for Load and Reload does? Wish he would have for those albums, would give fair warning.

KvP · « **Reply #181 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:39 »

It's also a common means of expression for mental patients.

Tyler · « **Reply #182 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 21:50 »

And various monkeys.

clockworkjames · « **Reply #183 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 22:01 »

Pretty sure alot of girls can pee pretty accurately standing up. But the whole having to be quite a bit more exposed than a guy does to do it means urinals are a no-no I guess.

tania · « **Reply #184 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 22:06 »

i find a pretty good way of peeing while standing up and having a vagina is to find a tree/fence/something to lean against, and put your feet at the base of it but spread them kind of apart, and then hold on to the support object with your hands. then you lean back as far as you can and sort of arch your pelvis forward and pee. it goes in a pretty straight nonmessy line and if you do it right it shouldn't touch your feet or anything.

however, i don't think i could pee into a toilet or urinal standing up if my life depended on it.

Patrick · « **Reply #185 on:** 09 Dec 2008, 23:40 »

Quote from: Nodaisho on 09 Dec 2008, 21:22

two doors one room

This reminds me of something relevant to poop-talk...

Liz · « **Reply #186 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 08:24 »

All a woman really has to do to pee standing up is spread her legs far enough apart. You can pee in a public toilet without touching the seat if you just stand over it. The only problem is that it is quite loud when the pee hits the water, so not really suitable if there are other people in the bathroom when you are.

redglasscurls · « **Reply #187 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 08:55 »

You could always buy a P-mate, they apparently actually work really well.

Siibillam-Law · « **Reply #188 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 09:12 »

That ... that's kinda weird. I don't see anyone wearing it/ carrying it in their handbag

Might make for a good new fashion trend, though

Everyone! Wear your P-mates on the OUTSIDE!

redglasscurls · « **Reply #189 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 10:20 »

I think it would be great for outdoor concerts and camping and stuff! Also I would totally keep some in the car for when you're driving and it's 3am and you need to pee. Squatting in the dark 'cause the gas stations all closed at 1 is not fun at all!

Someone buy me this, I swear I will use it.

Patrick · « **Reply #190 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 11:16 »

There's a blogger somewhere in the Israeli Defense Force who uses one of those to the complete and utter fascination of her male fellow soldiers.

Drill King · « **Reply #191 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 11:34 »

Okay this sounds weird but you can totally direct your pee standing up. Therefore using a urinal. If you spread your legs a bit and pull the skin up by where your pubic hair normally starts you can get about four inches distance, thus peeing standing up in a urinal without getting it on yourself! It's not really useful but occasionally awesome for winning bets.

redglasscurls · « **Reply #192 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 11:38 »

I've heard that works, but it seems like something that should be practiced first. I'm disinclined to risk peeing on my hands though, and most of them recommend practicing in the shower and that's just ew.

Edith · « **Reply #193 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 12:06 »

I was about to say I should try that in the shower.

Then I read Manda's post; apparently that's ew.

I pee in the shower, folks. If you pee on your feet in a public shower (campground, dorm room, prison, etc), you are less likely to get athlete's foot. My grandad, a medical doctor, told me that when I first went to camp.

Jace · « **Reply #194 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 12:08 »

I usually try not to pee on myself in the shower. you know, bad practice...

eddie · « **Reply #195 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 12:17 »

Wouldn't it just be alot less gross to wear waterproof sandals to public shower then scrub your feet later?

Liz · « **Reply #196 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 12:21 »

I pee in the shower. Doesn't bother me at all!

RedLion · « **Reply #197 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 12:25 »

Isn't peeing in the shower actually supposed to be, like, healthy or something? I mean, the acidity of it washes away bacteria on the shower floor?

I heard that somewhere.

Edith · « **Reply #198 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 12:27 »

Yeah, pee is actually really clean.

Jace · « **Reply #199 on:** 10 Dec 2008, 12:30 »

I never said I didn't pee in the shower, just that I didn't pee on myself. I also did it with a perfectly placed pagebreak so it seems entirely out of context.
LEAVING IT THAT WAY.

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Author Topic: Unisex Bathrooms - now with TMI! (Read 44472 times)

Gilead