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The Funniest Quotes

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Jimmy the Squid:
CUSTOMER: Those books over there. The leatherbound ones.

BERNARD: Yes, the complete works of Charles Dickens.

CUSTOMER: Are they real leather?

BERNARD: They're real Dickens.

CUSTOMER: I have to know if they're real leather because they have to go with a sofa. Everything else in my house is real. I'll give
you 200 pounds for them.

BERNARD: Are they leatherbound pounds?

CUSTOMER: No.

BERNARD: Sorry, I need leatherbound pounds to go with my wallet.

Will:
"Bender, why are you spending so much time in the bathroom?  Are you jacking on in there?"

Aztex:
Southpark season 10, episode 8,

Butters: i don't play world of warcraft
Cartman: butters you said you're on your computer all the time
Butters: but i'm playing hello kitty island adventure
Cartman: butters, go buy WoW install it on your computer and join the online sensation before we all kill you.

Jimmy the Squid:
ZAP: So the toilet seat is like the uncle or something?

Tenge:
Sealab 2021:

"I knew this day would come... dopplegangers!"

"Nice try doppleganger. Save it for queen Dopplepopolis"

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